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Secondary education

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Original poster

So.....will it be social death to start year 7 in September and not have a mobile phone?

57 replies

MrsFogi · 26/06/2017 19:18

Dd doesn't have a mobile and seems to be in a serious minority in year 6 but doesn't seem too bothered. In year 7 she'll be walking 5 minutes to and from school. So I suppose there is a case for getting her a very simple phone to be able to contact us in an emergency etc. But.....does every child need a smart phone these days? Will it cause her irreparable social and psychological damage not to have apps etc?

OP posts:
Sittinginthesun · 26/06/2017 19:20

Depends on the school, but DS finds his useful (cheap Vodafone own brand, no way is he getting anything more expensive!).

jeanne16 · 26/06/2017 19:23

I think she may well be the only pupil without a phone and may feel left out of groups using Snapchat, whatsapp etc. Personally I would suggest you get her one.

PatriciaHolm · 26/06/2017 19:29

DD uses it in school to take pictures of home work, stuff on the whiteboard to save writing it all (they are encouraged to do so) so it would be a pain not to have just for that reason!

BertrandRussell · 26/06/2017 19:31

Yes.

Justmadeperfectflapjacks · 26/06/2017 19:32

Dd will be getting one for Sept. Early birthday present and won't be a flash one either!!

mayoli · 26/06/2017 19:33

Definetely. Primary school it's not really needed, but as PP said often students use them in class these days anyway, plus a lot of early socialising/friend making is done through the internet when kids first start secondary school

CrazedZombie · 26/06/2017 19:36

Yes.
The average secondary school child has access to social media (Snapchat, Instagram) through their phone and they message each other on Snapchat.

Hulababy · 26/06/2017 19:36

IME Year 7 is when social media hits. I know they are only 11y and not really at the magical 13y when it's officially allowed. But pretty much every Y7 child I know of have some form of social media - Instagram, Snapchat and at the very least WhatsApp. And it is how their social lives are conducted, and this seems to be especially so for girls even more so than boys, again IME only.

If no phone, does she have any other way of accessing social media (supervised initially) or not?

Round here most children seem to get a phone either for starting Y7 or for their 11th birthday.

Those friends of DDs who started with basic phones had moved onto a smartphone of some form during that academic year.

oncewasawarrior · 26/06/2017 19:37

Sadly yes. We tried to resist getting DD one this year (year 6) but had to accept that she was missing out of things. Her friends were arranging impromptu meetings at the park and she wasn't finding out. When she eventually got one she went a bit nuts (for about a month) which is apparently normal. Now she's used to it and quite often chooses to leave it behind and only checks it occasionally. I think letting her get it out of her system in the tail end of year 6 before she needs to start high school was useful.
Finally, she had her induction day at her new school recently. She knows no one where she's going. This evening she was joined into a whats app group with some lovely girls she met at the induction, and they're planning to meet up. It's not all bad!

(Disclaimer- she's 11. I check her phone and messages and she's got no right to digital privacy for a few more years. I don't care if people think this is rude!)

Sittinginthesun · 26/06/2017 19:44

Most of DS's WhatsApp chats seem to relate to homework anyway.

starfish4 · 26/06/2017 21:56

Probably depends on her and the school. We got my DD a phone for secondary school, it's rarely on and half of the time she left it at home. However, she has an ipad so messages friends on that in the evening. She's just left Year 11 and has two very good friendship groups, as well as one or two others she sometimes see out of school. Her mobile has played no part in these relationships. She only did it a couple of times, but student reception let her phone us a couple of times she needed to.

The one time not having a phone would help, if is they're chatting to friends on the way home or go back to someone's house - I always had a rule if she was going to be more than 15 min late I wanted a phone call and didn't get one!

lacebell10 · 26/06/2017 21:59

Check with the school if they use any apps before making a decision. Dd uses Show My Homework app that they need to use to get their homework and to tick off that they have done it. She'd need one capable of using it. Also if they do anything after school. Dd was in lots of rehersals and needed to let us know when to pick up as they always changed them.
They do talk a lot of c*** on whatsapp but useful if they forgot what the homework was or if Sir has their book or not.

Rudi44 · 26/06/2017 22:05

Yes, my year 6 DD got one at Christmas. She walks to and from school with pals each day and it's been useful for her to text if she is running late etc. I would say 90 per cent of her class has either a basic phone or an iPhone and most are on some form of social media and there are group chats going on. We monitor it and she doesn't have it in her room at night

PettsWoodParadise · 26/06/2017 22:05

Yes. Best not wait until Sept, give them a chance to get used to charging it up, not maxing out data, walking along with it, crossing roads with it etc. We started DD with an old model iPhone that used to be mine and it was £5pm with Virgin. I loved the fact I grew up without a 'phone, but times have changed. We have rules about no screen time an hour before bed etc and it isn't allowed in her room at night.

RhinestoneCowgirl · 26/06/2017 22:06

We'll be getting one for DS (young yr6 and birthday in summer hols). I'm not that happy about it but accept that it's how they organise their social life these days.

His secondary school has a strict no phones out in school (have to keep in bag).

fusspot66 · 26/06/2017 22:08

The Alcatel Pop 4 is a nice little phone and you can cap.it. My DD is on. £7.50 pcm for 500 mins, 5000 texts and 500MB Data. She can make free phone calls using WiFi on.whatsapp. it's capped at £10.

TheSnorkMaidenReturns · 26/06/2017 22:14

Yes. Get her a phone. Maybe a burner first and then a smart phone for Christmas?

We have a c£10 a month contract for two secondary kids. Very limited data but they can call or text me any time (not in lessons!).

AChickenCalledKorma · 26/06/2017 22:26

DD2 is in year 7 and one of her friends has no phone. Not even a brick. She is the only one in the year without one.

I kind of admire her parents' principles. And she is by no means a social outcast - she's actually really popular.

But I must admit it's a pain in the neck, because I have got so used to my secondary aged children being able to communicate easily with friends, sort it their own social life etc, and everything involving this one child is three times more complicated because we have to go through her parents, who are also very slow to pick up messages.

I also don't know how she manages when teachers let them use phones to take photos in class (eg a picture of the homework task off the board), which is an increasing occurrence.

stonecircle · 26/06/2017 22:37

Yep

Original poster
MrsFogi · 26/06/2017 22:47

Looks like I'm in th market for a phone then! If anyone has pointers on the best contracts/plans please do let me know Flowers.

OP posts:
oncewasawarrior · 27/06/2017 08:08

Gifgaf seem ok for us. We got DD a second hand iPhone 5 from a reconditioning place with a years warranty (didn't go for the ones marked immaculate as she likes buying silly plastic cases and drops it daily!) I think we used quick mobile fix who were efficient. As we had the phone we then weren't tied to a network. She was on the gifgaf £5.00 a month plan but is now on the £7.50 plan.

We find she's nowhere near using up free texts and minutes but can burn through data, so it's been a good learning for her to use wifi where possible!

LostMyLunchMoney · 27/06/2017 08:12

If you have BT broadband you can get a deal for £5 a month.We got DD an unlocked Motorola phone for £80 from Argos and with the BT SIM she's been fine. No problems with going over her data so far and she hardly texts as it's all WhatsApp.

I've been so impressed with her BT service that I'm moving over to it when my contract ends. It's really irritating that she usually gets a better signal than DH or me and yet we pay way more for ours.

AChickenCalledKorma · 27/06/2017 08:24

If you're considering a contract look at Tesco mobile. You can set a cap that stops kids accidentally going over their monthly data limit and costing you £££. Also several nice-looking budget phones, which look the part without shelling out for big names.

fusspot66 · 27/06/2017 08:29

Yes, the Alcatel Pop 4 was through tesco

Mulledwine1 · 27/06/2017 10:14

No, it was at least two months in before my ds got a phone and that was only because my mum gave him her old Nokia. However, once he had that, he very quickly wanted a smartphone.

He's in year 9 now and is not involved in any Snapchat or Whatsapp groups and has zero interest in being in them.

Most kids are not allowed to use phones in school - some don't just ban their use in class, they also ban their use on school premises, even after school (I disagree with the latter rule as a kid might want to stay at eg homework club and need to text their parent to let them know where they are). So they are really not needed unless you have a complicated journey to school and/or have ad hoc after-school activities/clubs that they may only want to attend on the day.

My ds tends to leave his phone at home. I think he only really uses it as a music player these days.

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