Practicalities of periods at Primary - TMI warning.

[Strawberrybubblebath]

Did you like my alliteration in the title there?!

I realise I am posting in Secondary but I thought I might get more replies from experienced mums here. Feel free to move this to Primary if appropriate.

So DD1 (Yr 6) has started periods yesterday. All very exciting and positive. She was well informed and prepared , it wasn't unexpected as she has been having cramps, spots etc

She is however first in her small school to start periods. She is not a confident child. She is very embarrassed about being different in any way (eg taller than average, wrong sort of bag/shoes etc etc) She is positive she doesn't want to tell friends. I have explained why she should be proud not embarrassed etc but that is how she feels. It's all very new.

I am after some advice on the practicalities of managing things.

When I started I was at Senior school. Everyone carried their bags round with them every where and took them into into the loos. At Primary their bags live on their pegs. If she takes her bag into the loo I am thinking she might get comments along the lines of "Why are you taking your bag into the loo are you going to write something/eat lunch." etc as the only thing usually in there is pencil case and lunch.
How can she discreetly take towels/pants if accidents etc into loo? A smaller bag? Or will everyone ask what the bag is for?

There are no sanitary bins in the girls loo. What happens? Put it in a double layer of nappy bags and bring home? Discretely put in outside bin? Teachers loo when no one looking? Money is so tight they are literally counting the paper towels used or sheets of paper photocopied etc so I doubt they would put in a sanitary bin just for one child.

Period pains. . Take 2 melt on the tongue paracetamol to keep in bag or is that dangerous in case gets into wrong hands? From my experience of period pains I have to get a painkiller quickly or they take hold and are hard to get on top of. I realise she might be different to me. This is her first period so it hasn't been painful so far but I it might be different next time.

Tell the teacher or not? DD1 has forbidden me on pain of death from telling the teacher as its "Way too embarrassing". Do I go behind her back or not? Is it helpful for the teacher to know or is it unnecessary? Don't know how she will be at school as its her first period.

It's so weird that my baby could now have a baby!

All advice gratefully received.

Speak to the Pastoral worker if there is one. There should be sanitary bins if there are Y6 girls!

I fear this is imminent for my dd(10). School should really have a bin and separate loos for yrs5&6, I would certainly mention it and speak to the teacher. I would do it without dd knowing though if she would be uncomfortable. My dd keeps a tiny pouch with a towel in in her PE bag which is hanging en route to the toilets so hopefully she could grab it discreetly. Hopefully someone with more experience can help!

Thank you. She does really like the First Aider so perhaps I could persuade DD to let me speak to her rather than the teacher.

Most primary schools have a sanitary bin in the girls loo. However if they don't, standard practise is that they use either the disabled loo or a staff toilet if it is single user (staff can't share student facilities).

Some girls share with staff, others don't. Some will tell another female member of staff rather their male class teacher. It's really up to them. However if there are no facilities at your dd's school it might be more practical to let them know.

You can't give her medication unless prescribed by a doctor and then held by the school.

Sorry, obviously you can give her painkillers but she can't take them to school in her bag.

i do think you need to speak to someone.

At year six they should have bins as it is certainly not uncommon at all to have started periods at that age. However poor they are they can surely have bins.

Carrying a used towel in her bag till she gets home would be rather worrying for her no doubt, and a rather difficult thing to be asked to do,.

Can you sew a little pouch in her trousers or skirt so she can keep her supplies in there? I would mention it to the teacher just in case of accidents so they don't panic.

Boots do great pants called Diary Dolls

Oops posted too soon . Diary Dolls are great for avoiding leaks. You wear them with a towel / tampon but they made of special material . My daughter swears by them .

Your DD cannot be that unusual in starting her periods in year 6. It's atrocious if there isn't a sanitary bin available in the girls' toilets. I would be asking the school to address this.

I started age 9 and there were no bins then (and that's 24 years ago!)
I had to use the staff toilet. They're not cheap but I trialled fab little bags for here and they seal brilliantly so might be worth a look? https://www.fablittlebag.com

Thanks for all the ideas.

Please don't send tablets in with her! It's so dangerous if other children get hold of them. Much safer to be provided officially through the office/ first aid.

We have girls in Y4 upwards who have started, so there are bins in all KS2 girls toilets. We also have a single adult loo that they are able to use, separate from the main staff toilets.

It's so much easier of we know and in my experience, most girls tell us. Personally, I keep a massive box of spare pads and new underwear, which all girls know about. I think most primaries would have this somewhere. It doesnt have to be a teacher, but any adult wil help!

If its possible, the most discrete method I have used is for girls to leave a supply in an adult toilet. I then let them go to the loo whenever they need, and the rest of the kids don't notice.

That being said, all the girls in Y6 at my school see it as some kind of badge of honour, so wouldn't bat an eye. So far, the boys are entirely oblivious.

My dd started her period youngish in year 6 too and I think it was a big help to her that she felt able to talk to her teachers, the lady in medical office and her best friend. So work on helping her feel comfortable about that. They do have some things set up for girls in year 6 normally.
My dd found it helpful watching things about starting your period on YouTube. That might help your daughter feel more comfortable about it as she is not very confident about talking to friends and they aren't going through the same thing.

If she's only just started she may well get through Year 6 without periods that are heavy enough to need to change sanitary protection during the school day (I'm not saying this is ideal, but it certainly helped my DD - who started in Year 5, also the first in her peer group - get to grips with managing periods without having a whole new series of worries.

I'd agree with questioning why there are no sanitary bins though.

I'm surprised your DD doesn't want to talk to her friends, I've found girls at this age to be very open about periods and it would help to have one friend on side!

I posted a thread before about painkillers for period pains in primary school. The consensus was that I should tell a trusted member of staff, but DD really didn't want me to do that, so she does take some in her bag - although the layout of her school does mean that only her class and one other class in the year group can get at it - and I'm assuming they don't go through each others bags anyway!

We told her teacher,it saved hassle with not swimming.She had a pretty cosmetic bag to keep her things in including a small nappy bag as the toilets were stall type with no bins.After talking to the teacher she was told she could use a seperate toilet.She was lucky as her friend started at the same time and a few boys with older sisters guessed but surprisingly didn't tease.
Again talking to the teacher dd was allowed to take one dose melts but kept them in her pocket.

I work at a large primary school and so there are a number of girls who start their periods before moving to secondary. As mentioned before, it might be worth getting a small cosmetic bag (I got one with a cat on for DD) and DD can keep things in there. She could probably hide it under her jumper if needs be. If she needs painkillers then give them before school. The school office will be used to having medication left with them and she should be free to go down at break times if she needs something you've left for her.

She won't be the only Year 6 whose had periods over the years - the school should have a bin available, even if only in one toilet. You need to insist on one, they'll have them for the staff so it's not as even the bin is being delivered just for your DD.

We are in Scotland so girls are routine starting periods while at Primary, as many are 12 and a half before moving up to Secondary. All of the senior girls' loos have disposal bins. I don't think the "taking things into the loo" is an issue, it's quite easily to do this discreetly and I really don't think other children would notice it as anything odd. Agree that a chat with the first aider is the best way to go.

On the pain relief thing - this is an older child we're talking about. My child of the same age has just had braces fitted and they are quite sore at times, so I give her one single 5ml sachet of Calpol which she keeps in her pencil case so it's there if she needs it. She knows it's there, nobody else knows its there, a class of 11 year olds all know what Calpol is and does and don't take it for fun. With younger children I wouldn't give medication to take to school, but I think a child in this age group can be trusted.

Hi- this is a subject close to my heart, as I am passionate about girls growing up being relaxed and confident with their periods. Girls are starting their periods earlier these days and it seems thathaving a bin in the primary school toilet cubicle is patchy at best! Would you even want typical sanitary bins in the girls loos at primary school, so ugly and scary looking!? Would they even fit?We intend to work to address this issue as part of our #screwthetaboo campaign, any help and ideas from you guys is welcomed given I have older boys!

As well as being a long-term Mumsnetter I am also CEO and inventor of FabLittleBag (mentioned by Olivander84 in the thread above) and we are conducting research right now as to how primary schools deal with periods and disposal.

I would love to know if any of you are aware if your school does provide bins etc? Also I would like to offer any worried Mums of primary school girls a free Starter Pack of FabLittleBags so at least disposal is a confident experience from day one! Even if there is no bin, girls can seal away their pad in a FabLittleBag with total discretion. If you would like a pack just email me directly [email protected] Once our research is back I’ll let you know what we found out!

Teacher here - she must speak to someone in school, as it sounds like they are currently not properly sety up OR haven't commuinicated well about what is already in place.

We include all this type of thing in a talk we do early in Year 5 - show them where the bins are, go through practicalities (small bag in bag on peg works for us, as cloakrooms are outside classrooms and toilets open off them), clear list of people who can be talked to, spare pants & sanitary protection stored at reception and can be asked for by note or code word if someone else is there at the time...

If there are no bins in the girls' toilets, then it may be that she can use the staff toilets, and there may well be the option to leave a small bag of supplies etc in there as well if required (the staff do, as we also don't carry handbags with us around the school building).

We have arrangements for a single dose of paracetamol (Calpol) to be given by a first aider with a parent's permission, as do my dcs' secondary school. All medication except inhalers MUST be handed in to be stored safely though - no tablets in bags!