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Original poster

Time off for periods

51 replies

Emochild · 20/01/2017 21:54

Dd is having a horrendous time -she floods through pads and tampons in under an hour

We have been to the gp and told that because she's not in a regular cycle then she can't go on the pill

She's tried another medication to reduce her flow -didn't work

This morning she flooded before the end of her first lesson -ended up sitting on her coat to protect the chair so she wouldn't leave an obvious mark

She had pads and tampons with her but her trousers were soaked to mid thigh

School didn't ring me to let me know

She went to student services, told them she had leaked (but probably not to what extent because she was mortified) their response was to offer her a fresh pad with a charge of 50p

It's a cashless school, she didn't have 50p -but she had supplies anyway

What she needed was a wash and a change of clothes

Her year have been told in a pshce lesson that periods are no reason to miss school and they need to deal with it

I know this isn't AIBU but WIBU to keep her at home for the first couple of days of her next period?

The last 2 have been in school holidays, she's flooded through to the sofa and her bed both times but this is the first time she's had to deal with it at school

OP posts:
Musicaltheatremum · 20/01/2017 22:55

"Waves at doctorbeat" sounds a rather uneducated GP that OP has

Original poster
Emochild · 20/01/2017 22:56

I'll make an appointment with a different gp -there are many at the practice but we saw the one dd was most comfortable talking to -young female doctor so I was hoping she would be sympathetic

Fortunately her periods aren't painful but every month she gets really moody and tearful whether she has a bleed or not

OP posts:
Popskipiekin · 20/01/2017 23:03

Nothing directly to add re periods but I've just had a baby and felt much more comfortable using Tena lady pants to absorb my very heavy lochia than simple maternity pads. No risk of leaking over the sides - you feel completely enclosed. And with the right clothes you don't notice them. Bit more junk in the trunk perhaps :) Either at school or at home, maybe your DD could consider wearing them purely as temp solution for next monthly bleed whilst you pursue better fix with another GP. I appreciate no child wants to be caught with a stash of incontinence pants in their bag and they are too bulky to carry just in case, but she could put one on in the morning so she can go to school. And she could line them with a normal sanitary pad and change that frequently.

BeingMePls · 20/01/2017 23:06

Get them also to check her bloods. I'm suffering from flooding and it turns out I was dangerously anemic because I'd ignored the issue for so long x

Lemon12345 · 20/01/2017 23:10

Could she use a mooncup or similar. Not sure if it would be suitable for a young woman or not. My thought being some have measurements on, so she could make a note of how much she is actually losing to show the GP it's not just normal heavy period bleeding.
But I'd do that at home, not send her to school to cope with doing it there. Poor kid. I remember it being a miserable time and had time off (as did my sisters and other girls) due to really heavy bleeding and pains.

wtf2015 · 20/01/2017 23:10

An irregular cycle is not a contra indication to the pill. Please go back and see a different GP

BackforGood · 20/01/2017 23:18

The amount of fluid you're describing is not a "heavy period"

Enough blood loss to soak through a towel and make her trousers wet to mid thigh, in an hour? Yours supposed to lose a small glass's worth over the whole period.

This, and this again. She needs to find out what is going on there, because that is not right.

nibblingfingernails · 20/01/2017 23:19

My DD struggled big time with her periods - violently sick, major stomach ache, general unwell.
Saw GP and he offered DD the pill, I have to admit I wasn't happy for her to take the pill, after all she was only 14!! So he eventually prescribed her meformanic acid. TBH best thing since sliced bread! She is now almost 17, still needs meformanic acid but remains in school, no longer sick - yes gets stomach ache but at a more manageable level and now she barely misses school.

At first the GP was a bit Hmmmm.... as I didn't want my DD to take the pill - it wasn't the fact that he was offering a contraceptive but more that she would have to take it pretty much all the month. When he then offered the meformanic acid I jumped at it as she only needs to take it for the first fe days of her period!

sashh · 21/01/2017 06:47

I think you need to send a letter to school asking them what provision they are going to make for her and saying that if they don't she will not be able to attend.

They should do something.

By law schools have to have provision for students with disabilities but this varies. The school I'm currently at has facilities for disabled students that includes toilets and showers and supplies for kids with continence issues, adding some sanpro and a change of clothes would not be difficult.

I was like this from age 11, then I started to vomit as well. The only thing that reduced it was the pill, the only thing that stopped it was the depo jab.

IamWendy · 21/01/2017 07:10

Someone said Tenna pads......what about Tenna pants for the very heavy days? Just to give your dd a break from the worry of leaking maybe?
But I'd keep her home.

wannabestressfree · 21/01/2017 08:31

Why should the school be doing something? Do you know how many things that can be 'put in place'. The op sounds on the ball and I think needed reassurance that the doctor was wrong (they are). Some doctors are woefully inadequate..... before I was on meds this time I had a heavy (and I mean change hourly) period that lasted a year. The old male doctor was useless.... New woman doctor all sorted. It needs fixing medically.
At school we have
A nurse
Lots of spare protection.
Pain killers/ hot pads etc if needed.
If she needs to shower she needs to be allowed home.

wannabestressfree · 21/01/2017 08:33

What I mean is this is not a disability it needs management.

LunaLoveg00d · 21/01/2017 08:41

Having had a long history of exceptionally heavy periods culminating in a hysterectomy, I have realised that just because a doctor is female doesn't mean they're more understanding. Some are, some aren't.

Please make an appointment to see another GP. If your daughter was losing that much blood from her ear, or nose, or vomiting it up she would be in A&E and not released until it was resolved. It doesn't make it better because it's coming from her vagina. There is lots that can be done, and as she's young she needs you to advocate on her behalf and really push this.

chatnanny · 21/01/2017 08:44

Has she been tested to see is she is anaemic? My teenage daughter had similar problems (she was once squelching in her shoes) she became anaemic. The loss you describe, as others have said, can be a medical emergency. We also had lack of support at school. My daughter's problem peaked later than yours in the first year at university and it was unliveable with. The pill helped a bit but she would still bleed through on the first day and also sometimes have 3 week periods. In the end she was referred to a gynaecologist who performed a laparoscopy under GA and saw nothing abnormal but a pool of blood waiting. She inserted a mirena coil which sorted the problem out for a few years. She didn't even have a boyfriend at the time. I don't know if this is a solution for your DD but she needs urgent blood tests and a referral to a gynaecologist. The trouble is some girls use
periods to scive. I think go to school and explain she is flooding and possibly haemorrhaging so it must be taken seriously.

TeenAndTween · 21/01/2017 10:22

What everyone else says.
a) absolutely keep her off
b) see a different GP!

gnoomi · 21/01/2017 10:27

I too had bad periods at school, and they are recurring now (following second child). I've seen these: diarydoll.com/ recommended on here and am going to give them a try as additional back up. Do go back to the dr, but this might be helpful backup?

Original poster
Emochild · 21/01/2017 10:42

She's not been tested for anything

GP was very much 'it's one of those things when you first start until things settle down'

Prescribed mefamemic acid (think that's what it's called)
Dd really struggles to swallow them and they have made little to no difference

OP posts:
AWaspOnAWindowInAHeatwave · 21/01/2017 10:49

Mefanamic acid / tranexamic acid / naproxen etc did absolutely nothing for me either - for the volume or the pain... what did resolve the issue (mostly) was a combination of the combined pill and the depo provera injection together - suggested by a lovely gynaecologist after 4 years of regularly being curled up on the floor in he school toilets and missing lessons. FlowersCake for your poor DD.

Gooseygoosey12345 · 21/01/2017 10:54

I'd keep her off and write a note about "gynaecological issues" saying that it's sensitive and you would like it not to be discussed. I'd also take her to see another GP and make it clear that it's NOT one of those things and you want it dealing with BEFORE it makes her poorly. No woman should have to deal with this and be told it's "normal" because it's not. Good luck to you and DD

hairypaws · 21/01/2017 10:55

I'd see a different GP. My dd started the pill at 12 for the same reason and she wasn't in a regular cycle. She was flooding and periods were between 1 1/2 and 2 1/2 weeks apart at times. Definitely unfair to leave her like that. TBH the GP was more concerned about the flooding. They tried one of the acid tablets first (beginning with t but I can't spell it) but it did nothing.

babymouse · 21/01/2017 11:01

The GP is talking crap. In cases like these I recommend going to the local sexual health clinic - they are so much more clued into things than GPs and have seen everything!

Tigerblue · 21/01/2017 11:07

I totally sympathize with her - I had exactly the same problem at school with a two week cycle. I know I left a few blood strains on the hall floor or chairs as I couldn't just walk out in front of everyone once I'd started to leak. I got more support from the school than my Mum, so it's good your there to support her.

Firstly I'd take her back to the doctor - there must be something they can do to help. Do you really need to be in a regular cycle to take the pill for instance?

When I was at school, I was lucky in that they had a washing machine. The teacher I chose to approach for support had a massive storage room and I'd go in there while they washed my clothes! Does your daughter have a locker? Explain to the school you don't want periods to stop her going in and could they keep a bag of her items items in student reception, Head of Year, First Aid wherever she's got easy access. At least that way she's got access to clean pants, skirt, tights and a packet of personal wipes if nothing else. If they can't help, then you need to tell them she's going to miss school as she can't go around all day with strained clothes feeling dirty.

elephantpig · 21/01/2017 11:15

Sorry I know this is a tangent
But short toilet doors to prevent bullying?!

Surely a proper 'door' would be better to prevent bullying than a door that people could easily see over / under?

I've never heard of this and am a childless twenty-something. Could someone please explain?!

sashh · 21/01/2017 11:25

What I mean is this is not a disability it needs management.

No it's not, I never suggested it should be.

Schools should be concerned about the well being of students and their education. If the school has a shower room then why shouldn't the school make it available.

hairypaws · 21/01/2017 11:33

Also, as a previous poster said, if you go to family planning clinic you need to make appt with doctor. A nurse can't prescribe pill to under 16s. She will need to see a doctor. The day I went we were sent away as there was no doctor available at FP clinic, ended up easier just to see our own gp.

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