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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Year 7 Struggling to settle in

6 replies

perhapstomorrow · 12/12/2016 20:26

Hi, Just wandering WYWD? My DD started Year 7 in Sept. Despite appearing to initially settle in, it has become apparent that she is really unhappy. On numerous occasions she has come home in tears. The issue is that she has failed to make any friendships within her house. She is friendly with people but thinks that none of the girls really like her. She is always left out when they have to pair up for group work. My DD is quite quiet which probably doesn't help (I'm really shy myself so know what it is like), However, she has made a couple of freindships within a different house and now want to move to the other house. I have been telling her that I am sure things will settle down and she will find her feet, but what if they don't. Would you ask if your DC could move house or shall I just leave things as they are?

Just to clarify that the other house has completely different classes so the only time she gets to "hang out" with these other girls is at lunch. However, she feels she should be with people in her class at lunch as she doesn't want to be labelled a "loner" so is caught between different groups and in the process is very unhappy.

OP posts:
perhapstomorrow · 12/12/2016 20:37

Sorry - don't want to drip feed but her best friend from Primary school is also in the house she wants to move to. However, she has told me she doesn't care if she is in the same class as her best friend as she generally thinks she has more in common with the girls in this other house.

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Heirhelp · 12/12/2016 20:43

It is not unusual for children to have initially settled well to suddenly find secondary school difficult at this time of year. I would wait until January and then speak to school about her current difficulties and ask their advice.

perhapstomorrow · 12/12/2016 20:49

Thanks Heirhelp. It's so difficult to know what to do. On one hand, I agree about waiting to see how things go, but on the other hand, if she is so unhappy I want to do something to help.

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whirlygirly · 12/12/2016 21:14

We're having issues too after a great start initially. I feel your pain. I do think it's been a gruelling term for the new year 7s.

I'm dealing with a bullying issue for poor ds but parking everything else until next term now. They're all knackered, wound up and teasy enough.

perhapstomorrow · 12/12/2016 21:21

whirlygirly - Sorry to hear your DS is struggling too. I think what is making me think I should act before end of term is that I think one of the classes in the other house have a free space. But I don't want to teach my DD that she can "opt out" if things are a bit tough.

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Heirhelp · 12/12/2016 22:07

When does your term finish? If it is this Friday then wait until January as staff won't have time to give it as much attention with the end of term rush and it maybe forgotten about in January but if it is later maybe give them a call now.

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