Parents of Year 11DC support thread. The final term.

[OhYouBadBadKitten]

Eep.

That's sad, exit

Hope your DD enjoys time with her friends, and you're taking care of yourself.

May I ask a question about my yr9 DD, seems you guys have had similar issues to deal with.
I have determined underachiever DS-yr11, & hyper-overachiever-yr9 DD. DD is completing a GCSE this yr.
Nothing less than A* will make her happy.
She is doing a mock exam this afternoon (timed in a quiet room). She didn't know any examples for 1 x 6mark question & had a meltdown about it. I talked about strategies to deal with the problem of not knowing a bit of info needed for an exam question, but all unacceptable. So I ended up very unsympathetic, and walked away. She managed to calm herself down, eventually. She had some stress counselling last year, actually, that helped a lot when she is about to go into a panic attack.

What would you have done if that was your teen??

Have you talked to the school about it trout? She might listen to her teacher's advice about how to handle an unexpected question more than she'll listen to yours. Also, you might want to make sure the school are aware that despite being super-bright, she's also inclined to anxiety and being a bit of a perfectionist, and might benefit from not doing any other early entry GCSEs - she is two full years young from the age they're intended for and she might be more mature and resillient by the time she is Y11. My eldest DSD has had panic attacks sometimes, though not really exam related. She learned the best way of coping with them herself and was able to tell others what she needed after she'd had a few and understood that they would pass.

My DD is a bit similar to yours and doesn't like to hand work in that isn't perfect. Actually setting her to talk to my (also similar to yours) DS is a good tactic - he's so laid back about things and tells DD she's being stressy sometimes which can help. I want to put the two of them in a blender sometimes, and produce a more balanced child

I don't think that there's anything at all you can say at the time, it seems impossible to engage with any sort of rational thinking when DS is having a flap. It's later, when he's calmed down, that we reflect on what happened and how to stop it happening again.

That's good to hear dream - I think it's probably teh only book I've ever read from beginning to end with more or less no break :)

I'm sorry to hear about your Dad exit hope you're all ok.
Make sure you let school know too then they can support dd

yeah, we've had that conversation with teachers & other school staff. They just seem to try to give more revision tips without realising that DD needs the msg that it's okay to not be perfect!!

DD feels contempt for DS so I'm afraid he's not a useful influence.

I almost wish DD knew what it was like to have REAL things to be unhappy about (like Exit's DD). Sorry for your loss, btw. x

Have been working all day and only just got home. Exit so sorry to hear about your dad.

exit I am so sorry for your loss.

exit

Exit very sorry to hear about your Dad, so sad for you all.

Thanks all. Will definitely speak to school as I think it has knocked her for six. She and I held his hands as he passed. I was so proud of her for wanting to be there. But it's not pleasant. And you can't erase the memories.

They are both nice Dreams. I am leaning towards the black, as I think the colour flatters her lovely skin colouring.

Be very proud of your DD exit, although I am sure that you are.

DS has gone to the cinema and Nandos this afternoon but is continuing to study. And game. To be fair, more of the latter, but I am not going to natter, he may rebel.

I'd go for the black too dreams - always think it looks great with black hair/dark skin. (Looks rubbish on me though!) She needs a nice necklace to go with it I reckon.

DS meanwhile is not sure he'll bother with the school prom. I think he should go, but the idea of dressing up puts him off. He's going to check which of his friends are going and see how he feels. He says some people are asking each other out on "dates" which also puts him off I think On some levels he can be quite mature and gets on well with girls to chat to, but think that this dating thing is not quite on his radar yet, bless him.

Back from a few days away. Been to see elderly MIL who now lives in a sheltered housing complex and a few days in a relative's cottage with no internet and limited mobile coverage, so dd was able to do some revision and also have a bit of a break too without the distractions of social media.
Sorry to hear about your dad exit. I was there when my dad died (before dd was born) and you are correct that this memory doesn't go away. It will take a while, but try to encourage more positive memories too so that you both have good shared memories of him. I guess you will have better things to do over the next few days than be on MN, but it certainly puts our worries about GCSE exams in perspective.

We have gone full circle this week.
last week I was fretting the DS was not taking it seriously.
On Friday night he went to a friends house - came home drunk
Leave aside all that (whole other thread/topic) - needless to say, next day he was very sheepish.
Later next day DH and I agreed Ds would not be going out for the rest of the hols (hols end 19/04) after 6pm. After various explanations - we agreed that it would be definitely for this week and we would then review.
Since then DS has worked diligently every day, to the extent I am now thinking he is working too hard
I suspect he wants to go out this weekend and so is being extra-serious this week.
Every cloud...