Ds is 11 and just started Secondary school. He has ASD which mainly manifests itself in poor social communication and anxiety. He is an able student but struggles to keep up as his writing is poor and illegible and he struggles to think and write.
In juniors he struggled a lot with the dynamics of pupil relationships. He was bullied by one lad but struggled generally with social aspects. He preferred to use lunch club than go out to play although towards the end of year 6 he began to mix more. It wasn't necessarily successful but gave us an opportunity to work on social communication and friendships with him.
He also attended nurture group 2 afternoons a week, had small group support in literacy and in year 6 has a scribe, a lot of 1:1 and small group support and also weekly ELSA sessions.
We did a transfer review with secondary. As far as I was aware it was recognised that DS needed a lot of support to keep him on an even keel and reach his full potential.
I'm very hopeful for the secondary as it has a reputation for getting the best of its pupils but there is some incidents and some things that are making me question whether he's getting support as needed. However I'm also struggling with not having contact with just one person and not sure if I'm worrying unnecessarily so would value some advice.
It was agreed that DS would have a laptop provided by the school due to his writing and spelling needs. I've signed the forms etc but it's taking a while for it to be provided. Ds says they are telling him it's coming.
However, I've noted on his SEN details on the portal they've removed SpLD as a need and just left asd which is making me feel uneasy.
Ds did get a great set of results for sats, however he did have a scribe and reader and these weren't gained independently. He's told me what his literacy target is and it means that using the old levels he's expected to make 2 sub levels (fair enough) from his sats result - however that's independently and if he'd not had the scribe in year 6 and carried on making the rate of progress he did he'd have been a level lower. Technically that means he's having to make 5 sub levels this year. Ds is already telling me he's struggling to keep up.
Ds has open access to student services and uses this before school, break times and after school sometimes. He is socialising with peers up here which is great. However there is no support given other than a listening ear if there is a problem. Ds doesn't recognise his own emotions and will hold on to everything until he explodes. This was why he had weekly ELSA sessions - so he could dump problems and move on. Something he struggles greatly with.
So school aren't hearing about incidents and concerns he has. He's bringing it home and getting more and more anxious.
Then there is the incident where a boy threw Ds bag and took Ds phone out of his bag. Refused to give it back so Ds physically took it from him. Now Ds says that he has been told he can't go to computer club as they don't want trouble makers - and has to speak to a member of staff - which he can't remember who - about the incident. He really struggles to explain events short and factually and tends to retell it with what he has presumed people's intentions are.
Then there's the homework which Ds just cannot organise himself over and is needing me to support him on daily - including writing in his planner as his records are illegible and disorganised.
would you send an email outlining concerns? Ask for a face to face meeting and a new plan of support to be drawn up? Wait and see what happens and if they realise themselves he'll need more support? (I hate the waiting to fail approach but it can work) or another option?
I really hate being that parent but it seems you have to be 