What would you expect done in this situation?

[Chokingonhollister]

Name changed as very specific.

On a trip a couple of weeks ago one of the boys who has a bit of a reputation was winding my Sen dd up on the coach. He was putting his hands through the seats , poking her and saying she had bit him . She definatey hadn't. He then got several of his mates to chant biter at her.
Dd asked to move explaining why and was allowed but the boy was allowed to move behind her again and continued. Dd text me. I told school and he was moved.

Back at school however he has told everyone who wasn't on the trip she bit him. Lots of people are now asking her why she bit him and she's just saying she didnt. However there are several boys calling her Suarez (as in the footballer who bit) now and dd is getting very distressed. She has Sen and is very sensitive and was already really struggling in school. She is year seven.

Well your DD's form tutor clearly didn't follow the policy. I'd go in to the meeting acting as though you assume that the policy had been followed. So I'd ask:

1. When did the tutor inform the head of year and what action did they take?
2. What form did the investigation take- given that they haven't asked your DD for further details. Have they spoken to the original boy, or just the ones who have been calling DD names?

If they can't answer those questions, you can then ask them to explain why they aren't following their own policy.

a bit confused! befor I can answer, please could someone explain the difference between SN and SEN? You say your DD has SEN, which I would understand to be something ike dyslexia or dyscalculia.I am not sure how that makes her any more vulnerable than anyone else?

TBH it's irrelevant, no child should be bullied regardless of SEN or not.

SEN can include emotional needs, global development, speech & language delay and so on. Anything where they will need additional support to receive their education.

Why is it relevant?

So what is the difference between SEN and SN then?

Remember the previous thread. Yes it is bullying and needs addressing urgently by the school. Was the original child dealt with after the trip? Unfortunately dd had something similar occur on a y6 trip which dogged her until she left a few weeks later even though she reported it. Some schools are just flaky at implementing their own policies.

Well having used google for UK information it would appear SN and SEN are indeed the same thing.

Not sure why you couldn't do that yourself...

OP I implore you, be that parent. Be on at the school every single day if necessary. Escalate it all the way to the top if you need to. But make this stop.

I have AS. I experienced very similar at school. Attempts to deal with it were pathetic. I'm in my 40s now and I am still in therapy because of the damage it has done to me.

SN and SEN are not the same thing although they are often used to mean the same. SEN is a subset of SN and relates to education. eg Needing help to get dressed in the morning would come under SN but not SEN.

maypolist I used Sen because I was relating to issues occurring within an educational environment.

It affects her maturity, her 'mental age' her self esteem, her sense of danger, her understanding, her processing etc. It does make her more vulnerable.

Lizs they haven't spoken to the initial boy since telling him to leave her alone on the coach.

She has not seen him since. It is now his friends who are continuing it in her classes etc as dd does not go on the playground so she doesn't see him.

I've had a meeting with school today and been told boys give each other silly nicknames but need to learn some children are sensitive and don't like it ...

That is complete BOLLOCKS!!!!

What are the school going to do to ensure it stops now?

They've spoken to the boys concerned and the ones who carried on have been reported to their form teacher.

in fairness they did later say it doesn't matter if she is oversensitive (she is in general) they need to stop but the minimising it as just kids giving nicknames did get my back up.

I did mention that dd has asked to move schools and they didn't ask why she felt like that and was basically told that I would possibly find a school on par but not likely one which did as much for her as them. Sadly based on my state school experiences they are probably right . In fairness the senco has done lots for her.

That sounds appalling. I'd have expected there to be consequences for the child and a hardline approach to stop just this sort of "banter" . It is so hard to stop once started. It isn't about being over sensitive at all. Such behaviour should simply not be tolerated. Their bullying policy simply does not work.

Just ensure that you go back to them EVERYTIME there is an incident and tell them that you have a zero tolerance towards your DD being bullied. That minimising it is just arghhhhhh so unacceptable - completely the opposite of reassuring you!

Ironically hedgehogs I struggled to think of any SN that wouldn't then be included in SEN or the full term the LEAs seem to use of SEND. If someone needs help to get dressed in the morning they would also need help to get dressed for PE so then it would become a SEN??? Doesn't matter really just had me thinking!