Is it too early to start a 2016 girls 11+ W/SW London thread?

[orangina]

What do we think? DD is sitting 11+ for various consortium schools in January 2016 and I am slightly desperate for a thread to compare notes, pat each others shoulders etc..... I lurked on last years thread, but it didn't start until much later....

Just booking up open day places and filling in my registration forms now.....

I'll give you my honest view. Six is too many. It's a tough and tiring process and it all happens in a very short period of time. If we had added in two of the schools in your list dd would have had exams every day for 6 days running. Even if you do not have that it will be over around 10 days. There are pretty much 2.5 hours plus of exams per school (2 x 1.15 seemed to be the norm), but you have to get there early, its extremely busy and the arrangements can be a bit chaotic, add in a break and a complicated collection arrangement due to said crowds and it is an exhausting and somewhat bewildering day for a 10/11 year old who will often know no one and have no idea where they are. Repeat 6 times?

Nearly every school will throw in an interview as well, which adds to the process (our first interview was only very shortly after the last exam). As a very minor aside, DH and I had to take quite a lot of time off work between us over the period as well for exams and interviews, another reality check as to why 6 is not a great idea.

I'd agree that 6 is too many. We did 4 and that was ample - you only need 1 yes. It's easy to panic and sign up to do more but with the benefit of hindsight it's not necessary. Mind you I do think they get into the swing of things and get used to the whole thing so for some children doing more doesn't necessarily mean they'll be washed out. It really depends on your child and how they deal with the pressure. My DC enjoyed the whole process, particularly having time out of school and going out to lunch after each exam!

We did 6 private and 2 grammar for DS last year. The grammar were our free mocks as they gave feedback early. In west London 6 private is not unheard of (4 selective and 2 back off) It was really difficult not to succumb to the sheer competitive madness of it all. Ds took it in his stride and it was not at all tiring. He was glad to miss school TBH. Good luck to you all!

Hi Shirleycantbe - we're off to WHS for group assessment this week. Have you had yours yet?

mummyinatizz - I haven't even registered yet! We are going to the Open Day on Friday so was going to register after that if DD still keen.

Good luck and let me know how it goes!

We did the 11+ last year and sat for 4 schools as our head suggested. Two schools DC should get into on a good day, 1 school DC should get into most days and 1 just in case everything went tits up. We ONLY chose schools we liked and although the top two were obviously our hoped-for choices, we would have been happy for DC to go to 3 and 4. In the end DC was offered places at all, BUT the experience was very very tiring and super stressful. I just don't see the point of applying for 6. Don't underestimate the effect it has on your child - and on you.

I would say it totally depends on the child. DS did 6 in a breeze, DD1 will do none and stay in her mixed ability throughout school, and the jury is still out for DD2.

We did three schools that ds would get into on a good day. Which also meant that they were three schools that he could fail to get into on a bad day. There were no obvious back-up safe options for us to go for that were preferable to the local states.

For him three was absolutely enough/too much. He was knackered. He also missed a lot of school (3 days for the exams then two of the interviews were on weekdays). I didn't make him go back to school post exams, though apparently some private schools insist that pupils return (which is harsh).

His schedule was 3 hour exam on a monday, 3 hour exam on the Thursday, 3 hour exam on the following Monday. Friends who did our three plus another had an exam on the Wednesday. Maybe everyone else's children are tougher, but that would have been too much for my fragile one. He also went to a state primary so had very little experience of exams which made them more tiring still.

As it is, he was interviewed at all three and offered two (including the favourite) so it was all fine in the end. However, I did feel bad when I thought he'd get no offers and perhaps I should have made sure he had an ego boost from a less academic place.

Have just come across this thread and am having a wave of deja vu! My DD went through the 11+ last year so I may be of some use to those contemplating the madness that is the West London independent schools' admissions season! I would absolutely say that 3-4 entrance exams is more than enough; along with interviews, music auditions and the like, you'll find that January disappears. We applied to indies and state schools to give ourselves plenty of options and although I really didn't like any of our local state schools, my line with DD was that whichever school she ended up at would be a new adventure, with new friends, where she would do well. She did have her own views of each school we looked at - and they will do at that age - but luckily, our views generally coincided!
I feel I do need to say that the picture given by an earlier poster of the interview day at Latymer Upper was not at all our experience. They were super-friendly, super-organised and in fact I found them to be like this right through the admissions process. They have loads of sixth formers on hand to help out on interview day and while DD was in her interview, I had a chat with a lovely boy. It was all quite nerve-wracking but that was because I was desperately hoping that we would get offers from at least some of the schools we wanted!

The worse really was not the exams themselves, but the preparation involved, the competitiveness of it all and the stress and pressure poor DS was put under. I can't imagined how I would have felt if he didn't get the offers from the selective schools but just the back up ones that he would have got in anyway without any practice papers and extra work.

Shirleycantbe WHS today- Lots of girls, about 50, from whole variety of schools. Impressive words from headteacher, then girls off for group session. Slightly off the wall questions to test their thought process, be creative, ability to speak up, etc.

Stage 1 done, am glad that bit is over.

Annoyingly headteacher told girls not to do lots of practice NVR and VR papers over the Xmas hols - not v helpful for the panicky parents!

Like S999, I am trying to work out what dd's level is, in terms of working out which are the 'sure thing' schools, if such a thing can be said to exist at all.....! No help AT ALL from her state primary, head teacher takes a totally hands off approach to all secondary school applications, whether state or independent.

Sigh.

Anyone doing the Greycoat's language aptitude test this coming Friday?

Thanks mummyinatizz! How long did the whole thing take?

We are off to the Open Morning tomorrow...

It's so hard isn't it orangina. Several of the schools we've been advised to go for have up to 10 applicants for every place. Surely lots of those girls are "good enough" to get in, but some obviously wont.

It doesn't feel like there is a "sure thing" and this is what pushes me to apply for 6 schools rather than fewer. It feels too risky otherwise if only because of the sheer numbers involved

Schools over offer because most children will have applied to many schools. The ratio is not really 1:10 but 1:3 to 1:4

Shirley, I think we will end up applying to 5 independent schools (consortium, so 2 sets of exams) and up to 2 state (but only if offered aptitude places). The possible 6th independent (PHS) will require dd to sit a separate set of exams between the two consortium sets, so to be honest, we will have to feel very positively and strongly about it to take that on as well I think.

I have to believe that she will end up in the right school for her and just stay calm and consistent.....

SO, we went for the first round of assessments for the music/choral aptitude places at Marylebone C.E. yesterday.....

224 children sitting for a possible total of 10 aptitude offers.

"working out which are the 'sure thing' schools, if such a thing can be said to exist at all.....!"

Sorry to be pessimistic, but there isn't really a 'sure thing' among the more central London schools, simply because there are far more candidates than a few years ago (shortages of all types of school places looming across the capital). Even those which were considered easy to get in to a few years ago are really turning down candidates, and barely using their waiting lists.

So applying in parallel to state schools, looking to see if any journeys to schools a bit further out are manageable, or just tucking away in your mind which prep schools go to 13 (at which point weekly boarding becomes a more reasonable prospect) might all be fallbacks to consider in case private day school doesn't work out this time round.

Yeah not too sure about this 'sure thing' also!!

DS sat four last year. The number 1 choice was the hardest exam and hardest to get in to but he did well and has recently started!

Number 2 choice he got into also and was the 3rd hardest exam

Number 3 choice he didn't get to interview stage and was the second hardest

And finally the sure thing banker fall back option... well he was offered 'waiting list' so I guess he may well have got in. The exam was the easiest of them all by far - eg. the maths he finished in half the time and did it again to check.

I must admit, I totally agree with you about the lack of a 'sure thing'... the problem is, everyone says you should apply for an aspirational, a likely and a sure thing. And as far as I can see, NOTHING is a sure thing. So where does that leave you in your choices?

I think I just need to continue to chant my mantra in a soothing way.... "the right school will choose dd... the right school will choose dd..."

(repeat ad nauseam)

Hi orangina and the rest of you going through the entry process for 2016 - good luck!

It's more a marathon, not a sprint so pace yourselves as the stress gets to you otherwise (easily said I know). Just when you think the open days are a challenge, you make your application decisions, then xmas comes before you know it and then they are straight into the madness early Jan, or earlier if boarding.

I think it's a personal decision how many your DC sit for. Only you can tell what their personalities can take or judge on their abilities, how many they need to take. If unsure, many over safety net (again, understandably). If this becomes you, try not to get drawn into the drama of stats of how many children sit for x number of places!

My DD loved the whole thing (I absolutely did not) and after a dodgy first exam day, corrected her approach on the rest (4 in total). She really wanted the chance to secure her ideal school. Other children were completely worn out, and absorbing some of the angst from their parents (natural) but they are still 10/early 11 so read your child's maturity/resilience levels before putting them into too many...whatever that number is for you.

Pizza/lunch always helps after each step if your junior school allows...many have said this process is tougher than GCSEs/A/Uni apps because of DCs' maturity levels but expectation to perform is enormous...

And read previous threads. Learn from them. They are full of knowledge and underlying all of the past years is the same message...most do get selected by the right school, many get a choice

Completely agree with Ealingwestmum, but I'd add that your kids' junior school can take a hike if they insist on children returning to school (unless of course you're unable to be with them or you think they want to). Three hours of intensive work in an unfamiliar environment - that's definitely a full day to me.

The pizza thing really helped... but maybe don't go to the Pizza Express nearest the exam school as it's so embarrassing sitting there surrounded by posh parents and wan children.

Sometimes going back to school after the exams can be a good chance for the child to process the exam with classmates and teachers who've done it all/seen it all, rather than spend time with a wound-up, over anxious parent. I would also add that making sure your child continues in the routine of going to school in between exams is also wise. I know there can be a temptation to keep them at home but my year was told of one boy whose mother kept him at home to tutor him herself, and he ended up burning out and failing to get into the school his family wanted him to attend. Tutoring DC at home myself was never really on the cards for me - so very happy let the school do the heavy lifting and just backed up with practice papers at home.

Makes sense Harlowcar if you've come from a junior where others are going through the process too. In our case DD was sitting solo, as will many DC going through 11 entry, hence the value of using resources like MN for support vs RL! Last thing her school wanted was her coming back!

The after exam/interview 'debrief' routine has been probably the biggest bonding event between DD and me to date. Whilst most would be horrified at a parent asking questions of how things went, what were they asked in interview etc, for us it was the way to de-stress. And laugh at how crazy it all was. By that time, what was done was done..weirdly helping her to move forward. The rule was though, no talking until we'd ran off the school premises, and mindful as thankgoditsover pointed out, not to be over-heard in restaurants.

Not too difficult to spot the prep children who had broken their schools' rules, as they were always in uniform, even when told own clothes were preferable.

Do what ever works for you. Every parent knows they need to try and keep the lid on being too intense, some are more successful than others. Some kids like to do post mortem...others don't.

It is a relief to hear the stories from years gone by and I'm loving all the top tips, many thanks!

We did the Grey Coat language aptitude test today. HUNDREDS of girls there today, and there were 3 sittings. DD reported of girls leaving half way through in tears, teachers wandering around with boxes of tissues..... all for 13 places and no chance of revising for this test. So glad dd has had a dry run at a few tests this week, she has been v relaxed and felt very sorry for the upset girls, but has not absorbed any of their angst it seems.

Am already looking forward to the post exam de-brief ealingwestmum... and I hadn't even thought of NOT sending dd to school in between the exams. Is that what people do?