Waiting list....

[Tiasmummy]

I was just wondering how often I can phone / email to check on a school waiting list ...without seeming neurotic...which I am about schools as every parent is! lol! But I don't want to appear that way obviously :-)

My daughter is 9th place on a waiting list which I last checked a week ago...is too much to check again now? How often do you think is acceptable?

Thanks in advance :-)

I have not suggested at any point that I expect the waiting list to move any quicker if I "chase"

I accept that but there are parents who believe that chasing will result in an earlier offer of a place. I wasn't criticising you at all.

RedSkyByNight I think perspective is needed here. I am not requiring anything to be "fixed". There is nothing to fix. My daughter is not comparable to someone's pc that has crashed. I want to know if my daughter has moved up or down the waiting list. This should not result in a response such as the one I got. I am not asking 4 mins past the hour on the hour everyday... I asked after a week. It really is that simple. It's part of the job. There are parts of jobs we all don't like doing but it's a necessity... As are good manners. Simple as that.

I too believe that there are indeed people who will chase in the hopes it will improve their chances. I just did not see how you saying that bore any relation to me and what I was saying...as it obviously does not apply to me. Not taken as criticism.

Hope its ok to join in, I too am waiting. We are in Herts, and are not allowed to know our 'position' on the waiting list until tomorrow, when we will either get an email offering us a space at one of our higher preferences or we will be able to log in and view our position number. Then nothing will change until the end of April when they do another reshuffle.
When allocation day came, we were very disappointed even though we were not surprised. However, we have since visited the school we have been offered, and have had a meeting with the head. I do feel less 'stressy' now, and am happy that if a space doesn't come up on continued interest that we will give our offered school a chance. But, are still keeping our fingers crossed!

MiffyandSnoopy we are in the same position! When we first found out where my daughter had been allocated we were disappointed as was it was not expected. But now we have had time to really let it sink it and really research the school we don't feel too bad about it anymore. Of course we have higher preferences and will see how we get on with waiting lists.. But our worst case scenario is not actually bad.. If you get what I mean? Hope you get the best outcome for you :-)

Yes, we had to really weigh up how strongly we felt about staying on the waiting list, as we know that if a space comes up we automatically lose our current offer. But after to-ing and fro-ing we decided that even though we have come around to the idea of the current offer a bit more, we would still love the opportunity to snap up our first choice, and ds felt the same as the school has a lot more to offer him based on his interests. But we are ok with the thought that if we don't get the place we can give this place a try.

Tiasmummy I hope you get a good outcome too :)

I think it was unnecessarily snippy email. I contacted the school where my son is on the waiting list last week and this week. On both occasions the admissions lady was lovely and very polite. In fact we had a nice chat about how stressful it is and that the process can turn normal rationale human beings into quite the opposite! She acknowledge what an emotional process it can be.

In my case the school are still chasing up those who haven't declined or accepted places and haven't offered any places yet. I have been told that there are at least 7 places to offer so his waiting list position is likely to change at some point soon - he is currently 9th. When I rang on Monday she was still chasing up the LA for that information so we agreed that I would make email contact on Friday for an update before the holidays. I am concerned that places are not going to be offered until after Easter and I think that this is an unnecessary delay. I have not been reassured that they will be offered in accordance with waiting list position at the time the places became available so being aware of our waiting list position just prior to the holidays and numbers of confirmed places at this point could be important information.

Personally I think that once a week is perfectly acceptable at the moment while there is movement in lists as the trickle down effect of those declining places happens. In another month or so that will slow down and I assume there will be little movement so it may be less acceptable to contact so regularly. I understand that contacting the school is not going to influence my waiting list position but having that information does help me to manage expectations.

kla73 I totally agree! It was indeed snippy and completely unnecessary. I am glad you have such a positive experience with the admissions lady you spoke to. It makes all the difference when you are already stressed out. My daughter is also on waiting lists for two other schools and none of their staff have sent me an email like that. There was not even any avenue left open in terms of contacting me if things change or anything! Just a "we are full" abrupt ending.

Your situation sounds very hopeful! Being 9th with 7 places to offer sounds like a really good place to be. I hope you get the result you want and soon! :-)

Thanks Tiasmummy. I would agree the 'we are full' statement was very much suggesting and don't contact us again. Good luck with your wait.

It's can be a really anxious time, if you don't have a school offer that's right for your child. I wouldn't have been happy to receive that email - and it wouldn't have taken much to acknowledge that it wasn't helpful.

FWIW I am telephoning once a week. We were 4th on offer week and have gone down the list each week. Now 11th. We didn't get any of our preferences; we have the failing school.

The admissions clerk at the school is patient and understanding. There is certainly an expectation that we will want and need to be in touch. The Deputy Head even offered the extension number of the admissions clerk when we visited. At that time I hadn't a clue.

I've heard from two parents about two Heads, who are very supportive during the admissions and appeal process, because they appreciate parents who are so committed, and determines that their child gets a good education.

Good luck everyone. We're generally quite relaxed but have found this situation is taking a toll on the family. My 10year old is pretty stressed out about her offer. I'd phone just to feel I'm doing something to help her.

sparklingsky you are exactly right when you say its an expectation that people in such positions will be understanding. Its a must!
Its a case of having empathy as someone who works in a school environment and is well aware of how anxious parents must feel.

I was not happy about the email to say the least! I did actually email back...I said that I was aware when I last emailed but as waiting lists can change so fast I was not under the impression that enquiring again after a week was too soon. I also said that I am sure she understands that this is an extremely anxious time for parents and children alike... I have had no response...cant say I am surprised to be honest.

The clerk you are dealing with sounds just like how they should be! :-)

I hope you and your daughter get the school you want. Fingers crossed!

When I was in this position 2 years ago our LA refused to disclose my DS place on the waiting list at any point. Hopefully your LA's are more helpful and understanding.

JellyandJam This particular school is a faith school so they organise their own waiting list. I wonder why the LEA would give you no indication of your child's place at all? Other people have said the same thing about their LEA.

well, I was able to log on to the admissions system this afternoon and found that after the first 'round' of continued interest we are in 4th place out of 14 on the waiting list. Even though we aren't far down I don't feel that there will as much as four spaces becoming available in such a popular oversubscribed school. We wont be holding our breath!

I bring you hope. Two days after being told DD was now 11th, we have today been given the 11th of 11 places offered to the waiting list!! Faith school, best results in the city and oversubscribed. Good luck to you all.

I agree with redsky
If a place becomes available and your dc is next on the list, then they will let you know. How is you pestering them every week going to help?

I speak as someone whose dd has had a letter saying she hasn't got a place where she wanted to go for 6th form. It's disappointing, but me harassing the admissions person isn't going to change it - they've explained in the letter what happens, and we will wait and keep our fingers crossed.
Yes, there may well be movement, but it seems unlikely 10 people will have turned down places in 5 days and that they've somehow forgotten you are on the list.

SparklingSky that is fantastic news! Wow! Congratulations! What a weight off your shoulders! There is hope for us all! You must be so pleased. Congrats again :-)

Backforgood have you read my comments throughout this thread? Have I written in hieroglyphics without realising? Once a week is pestering? Really? I have not suggested anybody has forgotten anything. I want to know if my daughters place on the list has moved... And.. That's it... It's that simple. It's not complicated.

Yes. Read them all. Yes, e-mailing 5 days after you've been given an answer is pestering. These people have a job to do, you know.

Backforgood yep.. They do indeed have a job to do which involves helping parents by answering queries about admissions... Which in turn will of course include questions about waiting list places. Yes? Whether it be once a week or once a day, it's their job to answer such queries in a respectful and courteous way as they are dealing with understandly anxious parents. Yes? Like I said.. It's simple.

TiggyTape you have summed it up PERFECTLY! Absolutely spot on. Thank you. There is no place for snippy emails /comments from admissions staff in a situation as tense and worrying as your child's school place. Non at all.

Hi! My DS is number 5 on his list - going up agonisingly slowly! In our LA though, we're given a pupil number and can look up DS's place on any of the various lists he's on online. It's updated every few days, so we can just keep checking there rather than bothering anyone by phoning them (although might have to do that when we get to 1st!). All far more civilised and no snippy emails!