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Secondary education

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Original poster

Emanuel School achievement for nothing...guilt

52 replies

Ummymumski · 14/02/2015 15:30

My DD has passed the entrance exam to Emanuel and been offered a full fee place. However we were hoping for a bursary or scholarship, neither of which have been offered and we can't afford the fees. I now feel guilty that we have put her through this for nothing. We have dangled a fantastic school in front of her and now have had to tell her she can't go. We thought we were trying every option to make sure we did the best by her but I now think our strategy was a mistake. Did we do the wrong thing? I'm not trying to assuage my guilt (well, maybe I am) but would genuinely appreciate others opinions (even negative). Has anyone had the same experience?

PS I'm a first timer here so apologies for any clangers...

OP posts:
jeanne16 · 15/02/2015 20:01

Zinxie - just wondering why you are being so negative about the school. I have a DC there who is doing very well and is very involved in the rowing which is fantastic. Pupils get great results there,perhaps not as good as St Pauls or KCS, who are able to cream off the best, but does that necessarily make them much better?

Zinxie · 15/02/2015 22:28

jeanne hi, I don't feel negative about Emmanuel at all. Just that its nothing for OP to be getting upset over. It's not 'fantastic'.

I do take AuntieStella's point that all things are relative! And in a relative scale, Emmanuel isn't fantastic!

I'm glad you DC is doing well there. As I say, I know lots of kids there and who have been there. And plenty who gave applied there, and not gone there, and flourished elsewhere.

I don't think OP needs to be beating herself up over missing out on Emmanuel. I don't think what I'm saying is negative.

Pop1ns · 16/02/2015 07:49

Don't feel upset.At least you know the level where DD sat in the cohort i.e. near the top but obviously not scholarship level.Better this then having what if questions if she had never sat the exam.BTW she did well.

Scoobyblue · 16/02/2015 10:23

A long time ago, I sat the 11+ at the highly selective independent school because my parents wanted to see whether I was clever enough to get in. I was offered a scholarship but they still couldn't afford the fees (there weren't any bursaries on offer at the school back then) so I went to the local pretty rough comprehensive school. I did really well there and had a really great time. I don't have any negative feelings about it at all - some things you can afford and some you can't - it wasn't my parents "fault" - just one if those things. I'm sure that your daughter will do really well wherever she goes - she has done very well to be offered a place.

hardboiled · 16/02/2015 18:44

Zinxie,
Emanuel is a lovely school with a different ethos to other London day schools. You seem to imply that the OP should not waste tears because it's not a top school. But someone can feel upset for not being able to send their child to a lovely school rather than to a top school. If that was the school of their choice, what does it matter that it's not academic enough for some?

I think the OP should not feel guilty though because trying is better parenting than sitting back. They knew from the beginning what could happen and I hope she had prepared her daughter for these news, and can now move on and fall in love with wherever she attends. Lots of children in the same circumstances today across the whole country.
It will be alright, OP. Life is very long.

Emo76 · 16/02/2015 20:45

auntiestella Battersea park school is becoming an academy. And in fairness unless you live very close to Graveney or do extremely well in the wandsworth 11+, or are religious and can choose Lady Margaret or the Oratory for example, it may not be as bad as you suggest.

Arsenic · 16/02/2015 20:47

auntiestella Battersea park school is becoming an academy.

And!?

Arsenic · 16/02/2015 20:49

You're in danger of going to some kool-aid fuelled extremes there, Emo.

AuntieStella · 16/02/2015 20:50

It's already become an academy. I'm sure parents who live near it are taking that into account.

Still doesn't alter the basic position that Emanuel outperforms every state school in Wandsworth, with occasional exception of Graveney (which has similar levels of achievement).

TalkinPeace · 16/02/2015 20:58

2/3 of all the state secondaries in the country are now academies
what on EARTH would parents change in their choices

Emo76 · 16/02/2015 20:58

arsenic it was the way it seemed referred to as a bad school vs Graveney which didn't seem particularly fair.

Appreciate this is off topic.

OP - don't feel bad or guilty. How you handle it with her is key to her not feeling disappointed.

Arsenic · 16/02/2015 20:59

I hope parents take information, data, impressions from visits etc into account, rather than academy status or otherwise.

And SW London has many and varied schools. The borough boundaries are very porous.

How is Boligbroke coming along? Anyone know?

Arsenic · 16/02/2015 21:02

arsenic it was the way it seemed referred to as a bad school vs Graveney which didn't seem particularly fair.

It is the reputation, but reputations take a long while to shake.

The good news for the OP is that she has a bright DD and bright DDs do well in most settings.

AuntieStella · 16/02/2015 21:14

If you mean the school on Battersea Park Road, which was in special measures in 2013, and which has a history which can best be described as chequered, then I think it is fair comment to call it bad in comparison to Graveney, which has been 'outstanding' for years, and which has had the highest results in the borough for years too.

I expect that idc Bolingbroke will be just as sought after, but until its first cohort reach public exam age any comparison is likely to be based on newish word-of-mouth rather than decades of achievement bolstering the reputation.

minifingers · 16/02/2015 22:50

"Still doesn't alter the basic position that Emanuel outperforms every state school in Wandsworth"

I doubt there is any state school in Wandsworth with anything like the same intake as Emanuel so there are no meaningful comparisons to be made.

I also suspect that if you swapped the children at Emanuel and Battersea Park schools, but left the infrastructure, management and teachers in place, you'd probably not be describing Emanuel as a 'lovely school'.

AuntieStella · 16/02/2015 23:02

That's probably true of many pairs of schools if swops like that could actually happen.

Though of course the real estate and facilities at Harris Battersea (as it now is) are very good.

I'll be interested to see if the weight of opinion about Emanuel on this thread ends up as 'fantastic', 'not worth it', 'selective/unlike local comprehensives', 'most expensive comp in London' or 'everyone gets in' (the school's been mentioned in various other threads on offers shake-down, so paraphrasing other threads as well as this one).

Though I'm beginning to think Emanuel is a school on which there is little consensus.

DontGotoRoehampton · 18/02/2015 15:01

Op, what are the other options? I have taught in a number of local schools, including Emanuel, which is lovely. If you are in the catchment for Dunraven, that is a really fab school. Burntwood, not so much...

Original poster
Ummymumski · 18/02/2015 19:40

Yes, ZeroFunDame we applied for a bursary. We also applied for a Drama Scholarship. Neither were successful but, as I said, my DD has been offered a full-fee place.

I guess we thought we needed to try every option as there are no grammar schools in SW London.

OP posts:
ZeroFunDame · 18/02/2015 21:54

Oh - bad luck.

(Thanks for taking the trouble to answer.)

So what now?

Original poster
Ummymumski · 18/02/2015 22:58

Well... My DD got 84% on the Wandsworth test (I emailed council for the results - stressed much?!) but apparently that's not enough for Graveney where the entrance threshold is more like 95%. Feel like we're between the old rock and a hard place. Waiting for the March CAF results. Burntwood is no. 3 on our list... please don't tell me it's no good DontGoToRoehampton. As we're not likely to get Graveney or Wallington (DD also passed their exam but don't know if we'll be offered a place even so) Burntwood is a very likely outcome.

Heigh ho. We have food on the table and no one's ill. Perhaps these aren't really problems ( deep breath!)

OP posts:
Notinaminutenow · 18/02/2015 23:54

Know several very happy Burntwood high achievers. Parents extremely happy with the school and much improved by recent building works.

Someone mentioned Dunraven. Indeed fantastic, but if you are in Wandsworth you are definitely outside catchment. Furthest distance offered last March was in band 1.1 at 0.81miles. May have widened by
Sept.

Good luck on offer day. Sure your daughter will excel wherever she goes.

Also to those running down the former Battersea Park School; it had some absolutely fantastic teachers working in difficult circumstances. They got their highest gcse results but were still put in special measures. That Ofsted indirection report was robustly challenged to no avail. They had some difficult, troubled, challenging students but also some highly able students. Slagging off a school that is often the only choice locally is not clever. Hate that it has gone to the Harris machine but for the children's sake I hope it is a success.

Original poster
Ummymumski · 19/02/2015 00:16

Thank you Notinaminutenow. Good to hear.

OP posts:
Primaryteach87 · 19/02/2015 00:23

This happened with my brother. He ended up going to a great state school with all his primary friends and was secretly, he admired much later, relieved. My parents felt awful and apologised loads so he didn't think he was supposed to feel relieved, so didn't tell then! At 16 he had the choice to go private (different curcumstances financially) but said he'd rather be where he was. He did extremely well and was very happy.

Primaryteach87 · 19/02/2015 00:23

^admitted

Notinaminutenow · 19/02/2015 00:29

^inspection report

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