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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

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Original poster

Secondary school parents' evenings

42 replies

TheFirstOfHerName · 12/02/2015 13:21

Does anyone actually enjoy these, or even feel they are beneficial?

I don't like crowds, I hate standing around waiting, and it takes me more than 5 minutes to warm to someone and develop effective communication with them.

It doesn't matter what time our appointments are scheduled for; I always feel as though everyone else is managing to see more teachers than we are.

I have two of these evenings coming up, and I find them frustrating and exhausting.

OP posts:

littlesupersparks · 13/02/2015 16:07

I like getting a request for email feedback!!! As an English teacher everyone wants to see me so it frees me up a space. Phone calls are a pain though - it's difficult to fit them into the working day.

littlesupersparks · 13/02/2015 16:11

I understand why parents want to come and hear some praise but if your child is on target and working hard there's not much point coming! I had a class the other night - 32 kids, about 28 of whom I just wanted to say were doing well. I was there from 4.30-8pm seeing every student!! The time would have been better spent having half hour consultations with the kids who needed it.

mathsy · 13/02/2015 16:14

Humanjam asking things like "is there anything he can do to get beyond his targets?" And "what topics will you be covering next?" are good. Also asking if there's any additional support you could give him at home. It just makes the conversation more of a two way thing. And I know some teachers might say the same thing for lots of pupils so it makes sure they individualise their comments a little more.

AtiaoftheJulii · 14/02/2015 10:28

I've been to two this week. They definitely can be stressful/boring, but on the whole I quite like them. I like to hear nice things about my kids, lol I like it when it's clear that the teacher knows my child pretty well. I got told this week that wow, don't you and dc look alike, which really tickled me. It was good to talk to my y12 dc's teachers and be reassured that they and dc have similar aspirations for the future.

I also this week overheard a family sit down in front of a teacher and the teacher say, "remind me of your name?" - ouch!

And I am quite picky now and don't try to see everyone for the lower years - if you do ten appts it's pretty tedious.

SomewhereIBelong · 14/02/2015 10:40

My sister has twins and another DD in the same school year (we joke she had a private room in the maternity suite!) - different classes for every subject - nightmare!!!

ChocolateCherry · 14/02/2015 10:40

I find them beneficial/of interest but nightmarish to negotiate with Dts. Tbh though if I have any concerns I address them straight away, don't wait for parents eve.

We wear stickers to identify us. I think it's fair enough, the teachers must get boggle eyed at the procession of families in front of them.

thehumanjam · 14/02/2015 11:12

Mathsy, I do ask if there is anything I can do to help at home and they always say no he is doing fine or they have made suggestions before I can ask the question, we do go on trips and read books that will supplement his learning but I rarely need to ask the school for further information. Our school is very good at communicating so I know in advance what topics he will be studying, there is a lot of information available online I know what homework he has been set and when it has been handed in as it's all on the online diary. It just surprises me when some parents spend an absolute age with the teacher and I'm done and dusted in a few minutes.

When I was at school there was virtually no communication between parents and school and I can imagine that if I was a parent back then I would have had a lot of questions. These days we are invited into the school regularly for curriculum evenings, option evenings, etc, there is so much information on the website including suggestions to enhance their learning etc I'm not sure there is much more they can say. I do find parents evenings useful the teachers will tell me about a specific piece of work that ds has completed that they are pleased with, they give me information about his strengths and weaknesses and what we can do to help so it's all good. I think because the school are effective at communicating I don't have any need to ask any further questions.

BackforGood · 14/02/2015 14:00

Thing is atia of you teach something like RE or Music, you could teach the whole year group, and only see them once a fortnight - I'd rather the teacher checked they'd got the right person before commenting, if they weren't sure.

Emu1969 · 14/02/2015 14:07

Yep. Can't stand 'em.

And I'm sat in the other side if the desk.

roisin · 14/02/2015 14:16

I don't much enjoy them and don't see much benefit. We have regular reporting of grades and progress, excellent marking in books (which I check regularly) and teachers respond promptly to any (rare) email queries.

We had parents evening this week and were unable in the chaos to see one teacher. Instead we had a brief email exchange, which was probably more helpful that PE appt in the end. They offered a telecon, but it didn't seem necessary.

I like the opportunity to 'meet' teachers if I haven't met them before already, which helps me understand the boys' response to particular teachers better. If they are in need of a boost, it's good for them to hear praise about themselves. Sometimes - when I'm in the mood - I use the opportunity to thank the teachers for the work they do.

I've rarely learned much or had surprises at parents evening. In retrospect I would have been better off attending fewer PEs, or seeing only the teachers we "needed" to see. But as ds2 is in yr11, this was our last big/long PE, so no time for us to change approach.

Notinaminutenow · 14/02/2015 14:29

They are a bit of a bun fight, true - no appointments here, just (fairly) orderly queuing! We split up for some subjects and doubled up on others.

Full of admiration for the teachers - they all knew my DS's name, for the right reasons!

Learned some useful stuff about son's progress and good for him to hear how is doing.

We all took books!

Figmentofmyimagination · 14/02/2015 15:34

I prefer them when I don't have a DC with me - not allowed at their current school - now I have to take them with me and instead of learning anything useful about their performance it just becomes a series of pep talks.

JudgeRinderSays · 14/02/2015 15:42

DD is in Y9 so still does about 13 subjects, but has only managed to get slots with 3 teachers because they all seem to teach more than one class.I don't think that is a satisfactory state of affairs

clary · 14/02/2015 15:45

I prefer people to bring their child - a) it helps me know who they are (I generally recognise the children I teach, not always their parents) so I can call the right person over and b) more seriously, I think it is really helpful for them to hear how they are doing and how they can improve.

I usually take my DC tho sometimes (football practice, gym class) something else gets in the way.

kwerty · 14/02/2015 17:49

We have ours in the Sports Hall, which removes the need for parents to move from room to room, but it is cold and draughty and the acoustics are dreadful. I go home with a sore throat every time.

QuaverQuuen · 14/02/2015 22:15

A sports hall scenario is what I'm dreading. I wouldn't be able to hear a thing.

AtiaoftheJulii · 15/02/2015 06:30

Thing is atia of you teach something like RE or Music, you could teach the whole year group, and only see them once a fortnight - I'd rather the teacher checked they'd got the right person before commenting, if they weren't sure.

I then heard him say he had two y9 classes - so yes, 60odd boys (all boys, so not even a chance to halve his odds of guessing!) for an hour and twenty minutes a week. If he's only had them since September I can see he might not be sure, and of course it's best to check, but I'd still wince. Perhaps I have been fortunate to have memorable children!

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