I'm a weeny bit cross that there hasn't been a SW/W London Independent schools thread this yr.

[SonorousBip]

Every blinking year there is one - and I read, and nod, and note. Sometimes they go on for months and pages. But this year, when I'm actually doing it - pah, not a sausage.

If anyone wants to do a last minute SPGS/Latymer/Godolphin/ KGS/LEH/WHS/PHS thread, please do! (disclaimer - I'm not doing all of those.). But views welcome. Because I've got several days to form my final views

I'd decorate. In my opinion any child who sits these exams has 'done well'. Both DS1 and DS2 got a ride on the London Duck Tour when they did exams. It was a reward for the effort, not the result. Your DD has definitely 'done well'. I don't really approve, however, of big expensive rewards. DD knows someone who has been promised £1000 if she gets into her parents' first choice school. Ugh!

I'd let your DD get excited now about the colour but delay doing anything until everything is resolved.

Go for decoration.

One reason I post is that 11+ was so very traumatic for us, even though we got what we wanted in the end. Each of my DC ended up on wait lists at one point in their school careers. Both came through, one quite unexpectedly. Hence advice of putting a good Plan B in place and then fighting for your place.

Even if you go for Plan B, your DD has done well.

I topo decided on redecoration as a reward, and took them both to Farrow and Ball and let them choose quite sopisticated colours. It had paid off in that several years later their rooms still look nice and grown up.

Definitely talk/plan to decorate it and reward her effort.

mertonmamma I think all schools, especially all girls schools, have children suffering EDs.

Journey to school was a key input in to our application choices, thankfully the Dulwich schools have a bus service from SW London and the other two are a short bus/train.

I definitely think ease of journey is a really important factor to take into account. I didn't really pay enough attention to it the first time around because I was more focussed on micro differences between what were frankly pretty similar schools, when the elephant in the room is that transport was really important and not something we really gave a lot of attention to. This time we are much more attuned to it.

London is funny, beause it is not just "as the crow flies" distance but how the transport works around it. We have a couple of schools that are technically quite close but for different reasons a real bugger to get to, while others although further away are a simple bus or train ride without a change. My other experience is that its useful if you have a "back up" method of getting to school as well

Doubly important if your child is likely to be involved in lots of extra-curricular. DD was involved in the school play one year, so lots of picking her up late after rehersals and performances. The same if they do early morning rowing. And if you live some distance away, discourage them from taking sports, music or subjects which involve stuff. Try to avoid double bass, hockey goalkeeper kit or art folder. Ditto its much easier for them to keep up local after school activities like spoerts clubs if the the school is accessible.

Fiddle with the TFL journey planner, changing the leaving time slightly to get a feel for frequency and then look for alternatives should one transport type be unavailable. There are some odd but useful train, bus and even tram routes which can be used on tube strike days.

I agree that easy journey is vital. My daughter's current school is 2 min walk from our house, and it makes a huge difference. She doesn't waste time travelling and she manages to attend all sorts of activities outside school, has time to practice musical instrument ( she was invited for music scholarship at KGS) and she still had plenty of time to play with her friends.

mertonmama my DD is in Y12 at JAGS and I can honestly say that I have never heard her mention any girls with EDs. That's not to say that they don't exist there (sadly all schools will have cases) but it certainly isn't prevalent.

It's a great school and she's been very happy there.

I think generally in life, transport/commuting is really undervalued as a factor in decision-making. If you offered me a job that was 20 minutes away and one that was an hour away, I know which I'd prefer.

On the 11plus website there are people considering absolutely hellsome journeys to places like QEB in Barnet. Ones that I wouldn't inflict on my worst enemy, let alone my adored offspring.

All a bit irrelevant for us as all three schools are about 2.5-3 miles away and all a similar commute. There are no private schools any closer than that. I'm still conflicted as to whether even this journey is worth it and annoyed that I put my boy through two grammar exams when both would have been awful journeys.

I'm still following this thread with interest if not with much input (I was more active when the stripy blazer convo was happening). It's awfully sort of addictive the highs and lows and stress and it feels flat now there's nothing happening. DS has had one interview where they are interviewing about 280 and will be offering about 200 (I'm guessing) for 80 places. Another one on Saturday and we hear about the third (last one) this Thursday, I think.

DarkBlue, I'm sorry you're down. Please do redecorate the bedroom as its the process not your daughter that is flawed.

i commuted for sixth form. what a waste of time. (my choice not my parents)

as well as leaving home at 7am and home at 5pm, i ended up with friends all over the place too and feeling like i lived in the sticks (i didn't)

if a school is that important then bite the bullet and go boarding!

I agree about really thinking through the transport. One of my DDs schools appeared to be an easy bus ride for the not even 3 miles but though I threw them out of the door at 7.50 they often did not arrive until after 9 and were frequently in the late book. Not enough buses laid on at that time and so buses frequently didn't stop, either full or the drivers just couldn't stand another school child. Irony was that many were traveling greater distances in much less time on the school bus. Most teachers knew it was a problem route but in the sixth form it caused major problems with a tutor. The other school attended was further but a train ride, set out at the same time but bar one day it was totally reliable, in school by 8.30, with not one single late day, and a proper experience of the discipline of getting somewhere on time.

I completely agree that rewards should be for the effort not the results. There is already enough pressure on these 11 year olds, some in particular, adding £1000 or a pony into the mix isn't going to help. And then it is going to carry on, £100 for every A/A* at GCSE was a going rate. Apart from anything else how do you compare, As came easily to one of mine, but much more of an achievement for the other, and then bloody Gove and / or the examiners made a hash of devaluing the currency anyway . That year there were lots of pupils walking out of the schools in tears though they had put in as much effort as previous years. I have always bought them something that mattered to them, decorating a room is a good idea, and given it after the exams not the results. At 11 I allowed them to have their ears pierced, with a trip to Selfridges and a nice lunch, absolutely not a problem overseas but it sparked ear gate at the Prep...it might as well have been a tatoo.......

Congratulations Amidai's DD, especially 50% , usually these scholarships are tokens.

I would say though, since my DDs are Dyslexic (and one was not diagnosed until at the senior school) that poor spelling and grammar are clearly not a bar to getting in these schools. As I said downthreaddown they do all, bar Ibstock end up with around 10% diagnosed, which is the normal incidence, and are used to the signs.

Mertonmama - my dd's school bus serves jags as well - it starts at Wimbledon but at a hideously early hour of the morning and there can only be a handful of children on it. It's an hour and twenty minutes each way to do the whole route and you've got to get to and from the bus stop in the first place

There's no way dd would be coping if her journey were any longer - she's really busy at school and still does stuff out of school as well, then there's stuff like homework and sleep to fit in too

If my dd had a place at an excellent school ten minutes away, I'd take it no matter how good the school an hour and a half away was. Yes JAGS is a great school but not worth that kind of commute

SHS are known to give quite chunky non means tested scholarships.
Reeds is the same i think.

the head at KGS said the scholarship was a "token" monetary discount... I think LEH is more about the award than the discount too.

if anyone knows anything about what it means to be on a scholarship at either KG or SH school please PM me.

hope you all get good news soon.

Another agreement on easy journeys counting for a lot - which narrowed things down for us a fair bit.

dd had her interview/presentation this morning with Kew House and is more smitten than ever with it, and the people she met there. I have to admit (quietly, to myself and here, as its not my future school that we're choosing) that I'm a tad gutted as I'd quite like her to stay in the State system, which is her second choice...I feel guilty saying that, because no one is meant to feel ambivalent about these gorgeous schools, but I do a bit.

That said, she's chosen to apply for the one indie school that suits her personality the best, so hats off to her if she gets in - and nothing lost if she doesn't!

Congrats to all the DC who have secured schools they want to go to, and good luck to all those who are re-routing to other options - I hope they all end up feeling as though it was meant to be x

And absolutely agree with rewarding effort not results - dd has a bunch of new bath bombs from Lush (easily pleased) regardless!

Got a surprising rejection / do you want to go on the waiting list letter this morning from DSs 3rd choice school. Interesting. The exam was very easy for him - did the maths twice to check it, said comprehension was easy, and reckoned wrote a great essay, and the VR was the easiest ever. Small intake school so I firmly believe that they are hedging their bets and rather than just offer, they are avoiding giving a straight offer but testing commitment vs other schools. DS is level 6/5a and an all rounder too, with several sports and music ability in his locker.

Roll on the scholarship interviews and assessments this week and next at his preferred schools!

sounds like it waitingandhoping
if they are a small school they're probably offering first to those they think will take it/1st choice and testing commitment to waitlist for others. makes sense i suppose...

In agreement again about journey times. We chose KGS over Hampton as lots of quick bus routes there from us and definitely the right decision once the after school sport started ( the pitches used are even nearer to us) . We also choose a slightly rubbish (!) primary which is only 100yds from us rather than the much better ones father away. I think there is a danger of being swayed by league tables away from the path of common sense.

I suppose it makes sense Waiting; if he found the exam that easy they'll know he is likely to have lots of other offers and that he's suited to a more academic environment.

But makes sense for you to feel a bit

Yes it does make sense. And yes you still feel a bit

All such useful info about the travel. We are delighted as DD offered Surbiton. Her first choice is LEH though (interview later this week) and she also loved Putney. My dd is likely to be involved in every sport she possibly can- does this mean my life the next ten years will be battling Kingston roundabout /A316 every evening!? Both schools have buses there and back but presume she will miss them every afternoon if she stays on for sport. Putney on other hand, if she were lucky enough to get place, is super easy train ride. Would the experienced parents out there jump on a Putney offer even if the fields and space at Surbiton and LEH (if lucky enough to get offer) made your child jump with happiness?!

how easy are the Surbiton sports fields at Hinchley Wood for you?

If she loved Putney too....then yes. Otherwise, I guess I'd bite the bullet. My dd would rather eat nails than spend time on the playing fields, but she is similarly excited about various art departments/textiles/tech stuff so I understand your dilemma!

Oops - that was for Choc

I'm a bit confused....Wheresthebeach and Waiting - are you saying that a child could do really, really well in their entrance exams and yet still be rejected/offered waiting list because the school knows or perceives that child to prefer other schools over it??

If what you're saying is common practice then that changes things for most kids out there doesn't it?