Tonbridge or Charterhouse?

[violetsareblue11]

Hi all! I'm new to Mumsnet and this is my first ever thread and it's about a topic that my family and I have been thinking about for a fair few weeks. I apologise in advance for the length of this piece of writing! I have two DS's and one DD. DS1 has finished his first year at Eton College and adores it! DS2 is ten, and it's getting to the time where we've looked around some senior schools in the past year and DS2 is headed for pre-assessments this school year! DS2 decided after looking around Eton that it wasn't the school for him- her said it seemed too stuffy for him, and he couldn't abide the tailcoats. DH and I were slightly saddened by this as it would have been lovely for both boys to have sort of shared a school experience and of course it would have been easier having both sons at the same school for several reasons, but there was no use in pushing DS2 to go to a school he didn't want to go to, it'd just make him unhappy! I'll sum up DS2 briefly: he's super sporty and also very academic- and so we had to search for a school that could give him stimulation in all areas. We then looked around Winchester (which DS2 didn't like and he said "because it doesn't seem like a school where sports play big part"). We went on to look around Tonbridge and Charterhouse- both of which appealed to DS2 and he came away from the tours buzzing and I have to say DH and I were also impressed with both schools! So we applied for both schools, and DS2 will be sitting the pre-assessments during Year 6. He would then go on to go for scholarships at these schools providing he was offered a place as there's no way we could scrape through with paying half of DS1's fees for Eton (he's on a bursary) as well as DS2's for a school such as Charterhouse or Tonbridge and of course for DD's prep school and then whatever senior school she goes onto. I might also add that the headmaster at DS2's prep thinks we should go in for another school such as Radley and try to get onto the Wardens List (of which I think the chances of that are very slim!)not a back up, and also has said to us he thinks Charterhouse is too macho for DS2 and Tonbridge won't stimulate him enough, so even though I know DS2 loves both schools- the head' swords still linger in my mind somewhat! So to sum up, the objective of this thread- all I want to know before DS2 slogs through the pre-assessments for these schools is: does anyone here have any experience of Tonbridge or Charterhouse at all- and I want all experiences, warts and all- although preferably not the horrid horror stories I see spurting out about the likes of Eton sometimes! I hope I haven't sounded pushy in this thread, I just want DS2 to be happy but at the same time not to put himself in a school where he won't be stimulated or will struggle with his image! I'd love some experiences from any of you with either schools! Thanks!

If you want an academic school with a good dance pedigree then Brighton is definitely worth a look. I know they opened up another boarding house recently which proves its popularity amongst families who may live a little further afield. No Saturday school so could be good if your DS wants to be home for the weekends?

How things change. I grew up in Kent, fairly near Tonbridge, but was sent to Charterhouse rather than Tonbridge School, specifically because the latter was deemed "too macho" for me. From sports matches, I always got the sense that Tonbridge was a more rugged environment than Charterhouse. Bear in mind that Charterhouse is not a rugby-playing school, something that has quite an influence on the atmosphere at boys' schools. I also had my own room for all 5 years at Charterhouse, which was a rarity in the public school system in my day (early-mid 1990s) and which, again, was a welcome civilising influence, at least from the point of view of a relatively sensitive boy. It wasn't heaven, nowhere ever is - it's school after all. But I was grateful for a higher degree of individual freedom and privacy than I suspect I would have got at the vast majority of public schools.

Hi again, just though I'd give an update to say we looked around Brighton College- as well as Kings Canterbury- and DS2 loved both, and couldn't be dissuaded to select two out of the so we're now pre-testing for Tonbridge, Charterhouse, Kings Canterbury and Brighton College. Not initially what I had though would happen, but hey ho, if DS2 seems to happy with all these pre tests that he'll be dragging himself through, then it looks as if I'll just have let him get on with it! Thanks so much for all your brilliant advice and recommendations! X

That will definitely keep his options open . I would persuade him to throw in the Eton pretest as well since he may change his mind several times in the next couple of years .

We're week 2 into Tonbridge and loving it. We wanted weekly boarding and live v close to the school. We are finding this a massive advantage as we can easily get to all of the events for the parents and feel more involved with the school than we expected. My son is quite bright academically and seems to be in the middle sets. He got an average of 73% in CE and I believe the pass mark was 63% so don't forget that the pass mark only indicates the lower end of the academics, not the average or top end. He loves sport but is not A lister which is why we chose Tonbridge as he gets to play and seems to be coming on in leaps and bounds. It's early days for us and I am sure that others know more, just thought I'd throw my twopenneth in.

Hello
What was the decision in the end?
Is Tonbridge more difficult for international students or those living far away with weekly boarding?