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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

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Original poster

Teenage daughters not allowed to wear school ties!

71 replies

mountainavalanche · 09/08/2014 02:18

My younger son is starting in year 7 at the same high school as my other three next month, his sisters are starting year 10 and year 11, and my older son is starting his first year of sixth form, which has the same uniform.

Their uniform has until now consisted of a sweatshirt and a choice between either polo shirt or shirt with school ties being optional. But the school has changed the uniform for September so that all those starting in year 7 must only wear polo shirts and that although older pupils still have a choice between shirts and polos, older girls should no longer wear school ties although ties are still optional for boys.

My older lad occasionally wears a polo but prefers wearing a shirt and tie, as do both girls, who want to continue to be able to do so. My youngest lad is happy to wear polos but I have also bought him some proper shirts.

If the girls continue to wear ties, they won't be visible under their sweatshirts so I don't see why girls shouldn't be able to wear them when boys can? Most pupils currently wear shirts rather than polos so why ban those for new starters too?

OP posts:

SirChenjin · 09/08/2014 11:52

Whether or not they should wear ties is irrelevant - the fact is, they are dividing uniform on gender basis only, and that's not on. In other workplaces where uniform is work - nursing, armed forces, police - afaik women aren't prevented from wearing part of the uniform that men are allowed to wear.

If this was AIBU YWNBU.

HaroldLloyd · 09/08/2014 11:56

Oh it's not in AIBU is it. Good job I said YANBU. Then

nicename · 09/08/2014 12:07

Is this more about being tod they can't, so wanting to? I hated a school tie - there is no point in ties full stop, and I can honestly say that in the 28 years since I left school, I have never worn, nor wanted to wear one. I mean - it doesn't keep you warm, keep your trousers up, cover your bum...

Acandlelitshadow · 09/08/2014 12:08

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

YourKidsYourRulesHunXxx · 09/08/2014 12:46

What do ties do?

noblegiraffe · 09/08/2014 12:54

I work in a school where both girls and boys have to wear ties. They hate them and I can't imagine many choosing to wear them if they were optional. In fact the girls didn't used to have to wear ties and the boys did and the boys were always moaning about how unfair it was, because ties are crap.

So I suspect the girls will get over it.

YourKidsYourRulesHunXxx · 09/08/2014 13:00

I've just Googled it and one view is that it's like a big arrow pointing to the man's genitals

Sounds about right

nicename · 09/08/2014 13:02

DH wore a cravat to school. hahahahaha!

DeWee · 09/08/2014 13:21

Most children want to wear the ties????? Really?
Two secondary schools here, and most children put as no 1 advantage for school A: No ties.
Ds is already anouncing his plans for juniors next year to wear a summer dress as it's the only way to avoid wearing a tie.

nicename · 09/08/2014 13:28

I look forward to the thread 'DS wants to wear a dress to school...'!

rabbitstew · 09/08/2014 13:42

What a bizarre way to change the school uniform rules. If they want to phase the school tie out, I don't see why they need to ban girls from wearing it, first.

DoItTooJulia · 09/08/2014 13:58

But if girls were told they couldn't wear trousers, there would be outrage....can't see how ties are all that different. (But many will, no doubt, disagree!)

It's making rules based on gender, which isn't fair, is it?

Original poster

mountainavalanche · 09/08/2014 15:04

I just don't see why boys can still choose to wear them if they want, yet girls cannot .

OP posts:

nicename · 09/08/2014 15:35

Let's face it

nicename · 09/08/2014 15:38

(Dumb phone). Males are far more likely to wear ties as adults (at work) than women ever will.

rabbitstew · 09/08/2014 16:23

What have adult male choices got to do with children's school uniform? Neither men nor women will choose to go to work dressed like school children.

Original poster

mountainavalanche · 09/08/2014 18:05

I wonder why they want to phase out ties? Although they aren't really visible under a sweatshirt, it still looks smarter than without a tie.

My son has only gone tie-less a few times but thinks a tie looks cooler.

OP posts:

Original poster

mountainavalanche · 10/08/2014 12:25

A good compromise could be for them to wear ties when they can't be seen under jumpers, and take them off if taking sweatshirt off

OP posts:

blueqwerty · 10/08/2014 20:22

Both my DS and DD wear their ties so loose they can barely be seen beneath their V neck jumpers. Both usually take them off as soon as they are home. Not sure they would choose to wear ties if they were optional.

Suggest to your girls they try not wearing ties for a change. Is there any point their brother wearing his either?

cardibach · 10/08/2014 21:56

A good compromise could be for them to wear ties when they can't be seen under jumpers, and take them off if taking sweatshirt off this makes absolutely no sense, OP. Why wear them if they can't be seen? I just don't get your point.

RiverTam · 10/08/2014 22:14

so, if your DD and a DS both got a job in a bank, for example, would you DD want to wear a tie because her brother would be, even though no other woman would?

I agree it's a bit odd to have separate uniform rules on this issue but I am more boggled by the fact that any teenager, male or female, would want to wear a tie if they didn't have to.

Original poster

mountainavalanche · 10/08/2014 22:17

Ties have always been optional until now, but still worn by most pupils, even though they can't really be seen with sweatshirts on. My son has gone to school without his tie a few times, but said he wished he's worn it when he took his jumper of as his mates had theirs on.

The girls just want to have the choice. They said they would feels illy not wearing them. It would be unfair if a teacher made one of them remove it, but boys can keep them on.

OP posts:

RiverTam · 10/08/2014 22:43

but why will they feel silly, when none of the girls will be wearing them? Again, in the real world, would they feel silly not wearing a tie when no other woman will be wearing one?

It just seems a bizarre thing to get in a pickle about.

blueqwerty · 10/08/2014 22:45

If polos can be worn, tell your kids to just wear those, if not then they will just have to either wear shirts without ties or wear them knowing that they will be asked to take them off.

If your son is tie-less too they shouldn't feel any different, just tell them there's no point wearing ties any more.

Original poster

mountainavalanche · 10/08/2014 23:35

DD1 has agreed to go just wear a shirt but wants to take her tie in her bag but DD2 insists she should be able to wear it, as should her friends.

Yes polos would be a lot simpler!

OP posts:

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