QE Boys Hair policy

[rhubarbmum]

Is it true that you have to cut your hair short at QE Boys. I have heard from a number of reliable sources that this is true - short back and sides. This would be a reason for me not to apply for my son. The school uniform policy implies that this is indeed true. I can't believe it though. Anyone?

Interesting point HotSauce.

Actually, I don't think silly rules stifle creativity - not always anyway. I think some boundaries stimulate creativity. I'm not advocating a North Korea type school, but a few rules to rebel against, well they do the soul good. What teenager doesn't want to rebel a bit? And it gets kids ready to understand social conventions etc.

3littlefrogs - how does a state school prevent someone who isn't 100% behind its rules from getting in? I don't understand what you mean.

I wondered the same

What's the catchment area for QE boys?

I don't understand the question. How does any school deal with pupils that break the rules?? It's s bit silly to say how does the school 'prevent boys getting in' who don't agree with the rules.

The exam is quite hard, they get about 20 applicants or more for each place and the HT spells out the ground rules very clearly (quite terrifying actually) on the open evenings.

I knew it wouldn't suit my DS, but I know people whose boys went there.

That is a very good point to think on, raspberryripple, never thought about it that way and stash your POV away for future use now DS1 is fast approaching adolescence.

AmberTheCat One way you can do it is at EVERY open day and in EVERY piece of the school prospectus you emphasize the importance of following the dress code and indeed all the school rules.

You also make sure that prospective parents and boys understand that infringements lead instantly to detentions and withdrawal of privileges.

Your message is 'If your boy is a little 'different' or finds it hard to follow his primary school rules, he's not going to cope here. Don't apply.'
Hey Presto, possible rebels eliminated even before applications.
If you have been to open evenings at West London Free School or Lady Margaret School, you will know just what one of these talks sound like.

Fair enough. So it's not preventing anyone getting in, but making sure prospective pupils and parents know what to expect.

DS grammar school in NI has that rule. It wasn't strictly adhered to in the lower years-his hair was fairly long then-it would have been collar/shoulder length but he got away with it-inspite of the principals beautifully worded end of term letters about "boys' hair having a propensity to grow in every direction"! As he has got older, his hair has got shorter-if I'm honest it was me who liked it long!! So now that he takes himself to get it cut-it's shorter and shorter DK he's in compliance with those rules!! Facial hair-that's a different matter! He's been shaving since 12! Had ability to grow pretty decent stubble at 13. And at 16 could now grow a full beard! He likes the heavy stubble-it's his ""ID" into places that he isn't really old enough to go!! Must say though that while he's had a few "remarks" from staff, it's all been done in a good humoured/banter type way. He says that when he goes on study leave he's not going to shave. By end of his exams he'll look like Robinson Crusoe!! They'll mistake him for invigilator, not pupil!!

Fair enough. So it's not preventing anyone getting in, but making sure prospective pupils and parents know what to expect.

Well, yes, an emphasis on discipline at Open Evenings doesn't prevent anyone getting in, but it certainly prevents a large group applying in the first place!

Really?? Do you think an 'emphasis on discipline' puts that many prospective parents off? I can't recall any open evening at any north London secondary where there wasn't an 'emphasis on discipline'.

Most parents I know would be pleased with an emphasis on discipline.

My son had a choice between a school with a short hair policy and one without and although he had long hair at the time chose the short hair school. He then joined cadets so had to have extra short hair.
It was something to consider when choosing schools but I'm surprised that for anyone it's the most important factor.

I hadn't thought of the long hair / sex discrimination thing - and I had wondered why DS's comp that is scrupulous about many aspects of uniform (down to the kind and colour of bag they can use) is laid back about hair.

Lots of the boys have long hair, all is fine.

I wouldn't decline the opportunity of a good school over hair, but I am heartily unconvinced (after a good experience with a uniform-free primary) that uniform is overall a necessary or beneficial thing.

For me, it wouldn't have been the most important factor, but it would certainly have been a major indication that the school and I weren't on the same page when it comes to what's important. I think rules and regulations are very important, but only when it's clear to both sides what the reasoning is - so things that directly relate to education, like paying attention and doing your homework. Or things that make a safe and positive environment, like not bullying, not running in the corridors.

But hair length? Nope. I don't see that it directly or indirectly affects a child's ability or willingness to learn.

It's about conformity, and a willingness to obey orders from those above you in the hierarchy even if they make no sense, and that's not something I have done with my child, or would want the school to do.

But... London is a world of its own. If the choices are between a school where you need to cut your hair, vs one where you need to buy a stab-proof vest, then I'd accept the necessity. But I'd do my best to explain to DS why that particular compromise had felt necessary.

Really?? Do you think an 'emphasis on discipline' puts that many prospective parents off? I can't recall any open evening at any north London secondary where there wasn't an 'emphasis on discipline'.

QE is in a league of its own in that department, though. There are schools that have high standards and expectations but enforce them with a mixture of warmth and humour, only bringing out the heavy guns when necessary. And then there are those that expect parents and children to jump as high as they can whenever the school says so, and operate zero tolerance for anyone who might think that things are sometimes a little more complex than that.

So yes, i think QE's attitude (and they're very up front about it, mercifully) does make some parents think it's not the right school for their child. It suits some well, and others not at all. Def one to go into with your eyes open.

Is it like Spag Union in the third Diary of a Wimpy Kid film?

Interesting reading. My dd is going to the girls' equivalent in September - HBS. Do they also have a strict uniform policy?

I think a Sikh boy would be more than welcome to keep his turban on which would keep his hair off his collar and away from his eyes. Not sure why that would be an issue. I don't know of any Sikh boys (or men) who would go around with flowing flappy hair; wouldn't that be against the 5Ks anyway?

A school in Harrow suspended a boy who repeatedly turned up with cornrows, in spite of the parent signing - and therefore agreeing to - the parent contract prior to starting the school, which included hair rules. If hair is more important than education, don't take up a hard fought for place that another boy, who probably fought just as hard to get it, could take.

...and hope he doesn't want to join the military.

HBS is a very different animal. I've never heard any reports of them being particularly draconian or unreasonable.

I did not think there would be so many responses to my question - thank you everyone. I did not mean to upset people.
We have decided not to apply.
My nephew goes there and he told me he knows boys who were suspended for cutting their hair too short but not for having it too long.
My son's hair is of course far less important than a top class education but I also need to know that he will be happy and find like-minded people. It sounds silly but his hair has always been big and curly and it would be hard for him to lose this part of his identity. I cut it short about 3 years ago and he cried for weeks and wore a hat because he felt naked. It clearly would not be right for him nor we for the school.