Looking for alternatives to mainstream school

[Carmen10]

Hello everyone,

I’m having lots of trouble with dd. She has been labelled as a 'school refuser' and is now at her sixth school. It’s awful because she cries literally every morning and begs not to go. Her attendance is low and we have started to receive warnings about it. The school tried putting her in a special centre they have for children with SEN so she can work in a small group, but this didn’t change anything.

In classes she’s the opposite of a troublemaker – teachers all say she’s very well-behaved, always follows instructions and is kind to the other pupils. So there are no behavioural difficulties in that sense, but she’s quietly very rebellious/anti-authoritarian and complains about worksheets being boring. I’d understand if she didn’t like learning, but she is academically motivated outside of school. At the moment she’s self-teaching Arabic from a book and CD, and whenever she gets pocket money the first thing she buys is a book. She’s at the bottom of the class for maths and at the top for English. She never really excels in exams and says that she doesn’t understand what the questions mean.

She’s also different – in personality and interests – to lots of the other students. Her favourite bands are the Velvet Underground and Patti Smith, she reads Allen Ginsberg (!) and is interested in Taoism. She gets on better with her teachers than her classmates and doesn’t like being forced to play with her own age group at break times. At parties dd always wants to sit with the adults. A while ago she refused to return to the Brownies after disagreeing with the pledge (she doesn’t like the royal family and disagrees with patriotism). She hasn’t got this from her parents – I’m neutral on these issues! Despite seemingly not caring about schoolwork she is a worrier with a perfectionist streak.

Not sure whether HE is possible. There are practical reasons why it would be difficult. Also, dd is painfully shy and would never want to go outside unless she really had to!

I just don’t know what to do anymore. She’ll be starting senior school in September so I’m tempted to wait and see whether the environment of secondary school will suit her more. Does anyone have any ideas or recommendations? Do you think she’ll ever adapt to school, or do we need to look at alternatives? She comes out of her shell when she’s in a very informal environment and when she doesn’t feel as though teachers are talking down to her.

(I asked her what she would do if she wasn’t at school. Her response: ‘I could make a treehouse and keep hedgehogs in it!!!’ )

My Ds and DD are not at Steiner schools, but I think it would be worth investigating for your DS.

Heyhey, I know this is a few years later but I would really like to know what you chose in the end and how its going?
I had/have the same issue with one of mine and now hes year 8 its just becoming so difficult. We chose a local sch and its been a disaster! We have CAMHS involved bit school are unhelpful as they just say he should suck it up and deal with it.

If you have any advise/ideas

Hello Carmen10, did you ever help your daughter or find out what was going on? My son, 8, is very similar ... we don’t know what to do and he’s been homeschooled now as 3 schools didn’t work. He’s very bright, and very different! Hope your daughter is happy wherever she is now.

As a youth worker I really feel for you and your young person. There is so much alternative provision, you need to ask youth workers. I only know about London but here is a list of alternative provision:
Online Acorn Online
www.apricotlearningonline.co.uk
Lisa
01242 604985
[email protected]
Dalston, Hackney Inspire 34 – 38 Dalston Lane, London E8 3AZ
020 7275 6060
[email protected]
Millwall, Tower Hamlets South Key College 32 Mastmaker Court, Mastmaker Road, London, E14 9UB

Belsize Park, Camden WAC Arts College - Creative Digital Media or Performing Arts. Old Town Hall
213 Haverstock Hill
London NW3 4QP
020 7692 5860
[email protected]

Walthamstow, Waltham Forest BCE Big Creative Academy - Digital Media, Gaming, Music, Event Management, Marketing and PR, Performing Arts, and Fashion Design BCE Uplands House
Blackhorse Lane
Walthamstow
London, E17 5QJ

020 3873 5800
Silvertown, Tower Hamlets Caramel Rock - creative arts: clothing, Functional Skills, hair & beauty and fashion apprenticeships. (+ 07494436950
5-6 Lower Dock Walk,
London E16 2GT
[email protected]
Haggerston, Hackney ELATT -
IT and Business into work 260 Kingsland Road E8 4DG
0800 0420 184
[email protected]

Stratford, Newham
and
Plumstead &
Bexleyheath

London Skills for Growth – supported apprenticeship and traineeship	379-381 High Street, Stratford, London, E15 4QZ

020 8221 0500
[email protected]
www.skillsforgrowth.org.uk

Shoreditch, Tower Hamlets, The Complete Works – works in small groups in various settings 88-94 Wentworth Street, London, E1 7SA
tel: 020 7377 0280
[email protected]
www.tcw.org.uk

London Fields, Hackney The Boxing Academy - GCSEs with boxing as a discipline 23 Hackney Grove,
London, E8 3NR
[email protected]

020 8986 4674

Holloway, Finsbury Park & Angel, Islington City and Islington College
Tottenham, Haringey The Footsteps Sports Academy - sport with GCSEs New River Sport and Fitness Centre
White Hart Lane
London N22 5QW
Haggerston, Hackney Hackney City Farm – Functional skills provided at the farm Adrian Johnson
07950 536 796
1a Goldsmiths Row, London E2 8QA
London Fresh Start in Education [email protected]
0203 409 6410

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