Why didn't they tell us?

[NettleTea]

Just a rant really
Have another longer thread about yr 8 DD and her school refusal/ MH / physical health issues and had been looking round for alternatives, poss flexi schooling, possible home schooling, possible anything. Someone suggested a hospital school so I did a search in my area and came up with Christs Hospital school, which is not a hospital school, but a wonderful looking independent school with full bursaries available for those who pass the entrance at for yr7 or yr9.
Looked like a fantastic opportunity, and not far from us.
Except that applications closed for year 9 in sept.

So why was the option of local independent schools who offer bursaries never mentioned to us. We have no grammars in our area, and there was only one child we know who took the 11+ and travels 80 mins each way to go out of area. My DD had outstanding results in every test at primary, was put several levels above her peers. Is in the top group at secondary. If schools and government are all for social mobility, why are we not told about bursaries for secondary level? If she was in a prep school we would know all about it. I can understand why the secondary school might not want their brightest pupils absconding after yr 8, but why are the primaries not telling us. Why does the LEA not send out info about independent schools and which offer scholarships and bursaries, as standard, with the info it sends for selecting your Secondary place.

Private schools control their own admissions. If you really think CH might be a solution in the longer term then pick up the phone and talk to them. The worst they can say is that there is nothing they can do for this intake.

Maybe a change of school will help your DD but you need to think about what type of school would really suit her.

Fingers crossed she is recovering well.

Norude my experience is completely different from yours despite living in two areas where the schools were described as ofstead outstanding we found and in fact were advised by the schools that my super bright DS would be better off in the independent sector as they were unable to meet his needs

In those cases I think there is an argument for the LEA to fund the cost of the private school. It isn't really different from funding a place for a child with severe learning difficulties or disabilities that can't be catered for in the LEAs maintained schools. If the LEA can't provide an education for a child then they should fund an appropriate placement. Although I think that most LEAs would not admit to bring unable to cater for the top 0.2% of academically able children especially if it means them funding an appropriate placement.
I do agree that some schools aren't able to cater for the very top ability group. With your DS were you offered any funding for an appropriate education or just advised that he would be better catered for in the independent sector? I'm guessing it's the latter, in which case the LEA is failing in its duty to provide an appropriate education.
One of my children is in the top 0.5% (according to test scores) and our local outstanding school failed him miserably, but they would never have admitted to it. We have moved him to a school which can meet his needs but we are having to pay for that privilege and it isn't easy.

Ch don't give bursaries for day places , only full boarding they come home once every 3 weeks .

Norude of course we weren't offered financial help we've just been lucky and been able to get it from the schools my DS attends/has
Sadly for course many aren't as lucky.

It isn't really different from funding a place for a child with severe learning difficulties or disabilities -- well maybe, but have you actually tried getting that kind of funding agreed either?

As they say if you don't ask you don't get , but CH are on lock down at the moment due to results just coming out for the first round so they've got 400 parents ringing and emailing asking why their child didn't get a place ( guilty as charged your honour ) .

Well the specialist psychologist at the hospital has said today that this goes far, far deeper than 'school refusal' and as such shouldnt be categorised as that as the mental health problems are more complex as that - the refusal is merely a diversion symptom.

Looks like some chatting with the out of school LEA co-ordinator and the thoughts of ANY school (apart from the online stuff she has been offered already, plus gentle social things) is out of the window for the forseeable future.

She is also at the lowest physical place she has ever been too, so getting her strong and well in every way is the ONLY thing I am going to worry about right now

Nettle so sad to read that your dd is in such a dark dark place. Have they been able to give you any help and guidance on how to help her psychologically as well as pysically?

I think that is all starting now. She just wants to be with me, at home, feeling safe. Sadly she has at least 2 weeks in hospital now and I have had to leave her there on her own because they cant let under 16s on the ward and DS is only 7. Luckily we have several friends near the hospital (which is 2 1/2 hours away) and they are doing a rota of visits until Friday when DS's school have given him the day off so we can go up and hopefully stay in parents accomodation, and see her again. Its heartbreaking.
She saw a lovely lady at CAMHs when she was 6, and again at 8 but she seems to have left now. Went back a couple of years later when she started refusing to do her meds/physio and they were useless. Although we live in a nice town we are part of a bigger area which has 2 big towns with bad problems. I felt that they were more assessing my capability rather than our need, and balanced against violent, chaotic families with real drug/violence/antisocial problems we were pushed out the door with a 'you care very much and have a good relationship, just be a good girl' pat on the head.
DDs specialist unit has only just recieved funding for a psychotherapist, and we were referred by our local consultant pretty much as soon as she realised it was available, and that local provision was, basically, crap. They just didnt seem to have the capability of dealing with a kid in DDs situation, which is madness because there must be loads of kids struggling with serious illnesses.

nettle this sounds like a really tough situation.

does DD have a diagnosis? a statement? if so there are some great specialist schools in the area (i'm assuming you're near me as Christ's Hospital is!)

I;m dreading the thought of trying to get DS1 into an appropriate secondary mind you, it's such a minefield.

Is it an option to homeschool for a while? maybe she just needs some time out from the whole thing?

She doesnt have any statement, as up until recently she had a medical condition, but it really wasnt impacting on her education. We are quite a bit further east than you I imagine.

I think what I am going to try to push for is a mix of HE and trying to keep the online stuff to keep her toe in the school door, as there is no way on earth I can come up with the money I would need to pay for exams myself. And she may feel confident to go back in at some point. She said, theoretically, that she MIGHT, later on, consider just going in and doing one or two subjects, ones which she enjoys, so long as she could come straight home. But she was worried that people would think she was wierd doing that and ask why she wasnt there FT.

I did say that they must know she was ill - that they knew she wasnt bunking off, and she hadnt been suspended, plus kids from her last school and in her form knew she wasnt well, so she could always tell them she wasnt well enough to be there FT, and she was having other lessons at home. She seemed as if that might be possible. Hypothetically. But not yet.

I have written to the area co-ordinator of the LEA who deals with all education outside school, and suggested a meeting after DD comes home from hospital. I believe they are obliged to provide her with an education, and this lady is supposed to be really great. I think, given the schools previous attitude, that it would pay to get the LEA onside, especially if we have a report from the psychotherapist, and see whether we can find a solution. I dont think the school is going to argue with the LEA, and it literally is 200 yards from our house, so very easy for her to get in and out of.

well maybe, but have you actually tried getting that kind of funding agreed either?

Yes, as it happens I have tried to get funding for a non maintained special school. I have two children, one in the top 0.5% and one with very severe learning disabilities. When my child with SLD was starting school I was offered an unsuitable placement and refused it and fought for funding for a non maintained special school. Lots of arguments with the LEA and me bring prepared to home educate whilst pursuing a legal battle promoted them into offering me a suitable placement in a maintained special school (that we had not previously been offered, nor known was available as it was a specific unit within a special school).
So I am well aware that it isn't easy to get funding for non maintained specialist education for a child with learning difficulties.
The fact remains though that it is possible to get funding for a child with learning difficulties, either at a non maintained special school, a placement at a maintained special school (which is very expensive still), or additional support in a mainstream school.
It isn't possible to get funding for a non maintained school for a child at the opposite end of the learning scale though, regardless of whether the local state school can appropriately meet his learning needs or not.

Nettle - have you thought about signing your dd up for a virtual school until she is well enough to rejoin a mainstream school environment?

news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/education/5382994.stm

There is some info on that link about virtual schools.
I hope your dd gets better soon.

Norudeshitrequired that seems very similar to what the LEA are currently providing for her.
The inclusion team who arranged this have been in touch, she is recommending a meeting to put a PEP (personal education plan) in place for DD, and says the school need to make reasonable adjustments to support her learning. She has given me her phone number to call, so we can discuss things before this meeting with the school.

Nettletea- it's good news about the PEP, because at least they are acknowledging that they need to do something.
I don't know what area you live in but you could request a Team around the child or child in need meeting be called (the title of meeting depends what your LA call it). The purpose of the meeting is to draw all professionals and yourself together to discuss the best way forward. The process will help ensure that all professionals are on the same page, are aware of the same relevant information and can collectively decided what needs to be done.
When more than one agency (in your case CAHMS, school, other services) are involved it helps for everyone to get together and make plans. It also helps as a minutes will need to be taken and decisions made on who will be doing what and when they will need to have it done by.
I hope that makes some sense.

Nettle, so sorry to hear about your dd.

One thing I do have experience of is of a child returning to school part time.

My dd has a physically painful condition and had bad experiences at junior school, the combination resulting in a breakdown at secondary, school refusal and suicide attempts.

We worked very closely with the school and eventually worked out a plan whereby she went back for half days, but only went to classes in her core subjects, and worked in the special unit for the rest of the half day; the deal was, she could decide for herself when she felt ready to return to any other lessons. She eventually managed to sit enough GCSE's to get into the college of her choice. We did briefly get her a tutor to bring her maths up to scratch.

She doesn't seem to have encountered any odd reactions from her classmates; in fact, she told me it wasn't that unusual for students to have part-time arrangements or work out of class. Any school is going to have a few students who need special arrangements due to health problems or SN. She just told them she hadn't been well.

She is now doing her first term at Sixth Form college, very happy (if exhausted as not used to working full days), sees it as a chance to reinvent herself.

Of course there is no knowing what might work for your dd. But this was one route that worked for us.

Best of luck!

I don't think you can expect state schools to tell you - unfortunately it is down to the parents. This is why my friend went to a great school on a full bursary and I didn't (amongst other things). You are lucky in that now there is the internet to research