Year 7 - please tell me it gets better.

[drzeus]

Struggling with the change from primary to secondary school. So far DS has lost a door key, forgotten home-learning, lost lunch money, lost pupil journal and generally been dis-organised.

To top it off this evening, he told me that he's lost his entire new PE and sports kit including new trainers, rugby boots, shorts, rugby shirt and holdall etc. Oh, and he needs it for PE next Monday. I could cry. He says he's looked for it at school but can't find it. It's all labelled but I wonder if we'll get it back. I can't really afford to replace it all so soon. He doesn't seem particularly bothered.

I've offered to help him prioritise his homework but he just will not sit down and do it (until its due). Complains of tiredness, but then won't go to bed and settle down. We've got a checklist of items to take to school posted on the fridge to help but it doesn't seem to be working.

I am at the end of my tether and it's not yet half term! Anyone got any top tips to getting through this nightmare!

As a secondary school teacher I would say that some kids need extra support from their parents and so whilst I agree with "tough love" 11 and 12 years of age can be quite young to be self organising and motivating.

My advice would be for parents to check the planner every evening and make the child do their homework before they watch TV, play computer games or go around to a friends. Take all screens out of bedrooms too (including the computer - homework doesn't have to be done in their bedroom) kids will go to bed at whatever time you say but won't go to sleep as they will be on FB or on a game.

Vitamins are a good idea too as lots of bugs go around this term.

Bags should be packed the night before and left near the front door so nothing is forgotten.

Lastly allow kids to take the consequences of losing PE kit, pens, etc - they often need to learn the hard way but do make sure all equipment is clearly labelled (on the outside too) so it can be returned easily. Lost property may have your DC's stuff as well so it's worth getting them to check.

If you really have a concern do contact form tutors as they will work with you to get your DC back on track and organised. Good luck!

DD1 somehow, follows the scribbles in her planner and DH chases both of them like a mother hen checking books and kit in the morning. I hide, I'd let them mess it up. He's far too nice.

I issue frequent reminders all evening and all week end to do HW, but no way am I finding, three lap tops, two phones, two iPods, a kindle, two DS's and a mp3 player every time I want HW done.

I do suggest that Dr Who has nothing to do with Geography etc quite often. DD1 still gets 99% in science exams so she must do somethings she should.

Xen do you actually have teen children? If so you might realize that they won't go to sleep when you send them to be regardless of screens. DD1 reads, she draws, she knits and sometimes she practices her singing and wakes up DD2. She does not go to sleep!

Now I need to say HW to DD2 and hang up wet socks.

yep. all the same i'm afraid.
I made ds2 wear stuff out of the lost property for a month before I replaced his lost rugby kit.
I replaced it, he lost it again so he paid for the replacement.

Homework, we give/gave him lot of support but he was still a bit hit & miss, now I remind him, give him the time & space, if its not all done & bag ready for the next day well before bed time - tough! He either has to do it at break time or take the punishment.
& if he gets a note in his diary about missed homework we make him miss his next club football/rugby etc.
Taking away his sport seems to have given him the kick he needs... along with a bit of maturity

Well, I went to say HW to DD only discover she was out in the garden with next doors grand daughter.

So I'll spend today saying it instead.