My son is in bits about his Secondary - what can we do now?

[QuintessentialOldDear]

He has suddenly changed his mind.
We have naturally turned down his state offering. Now he wants it.

He is nr 31 on the waiting list for his Catholic first choice, so not likely to happen. I just spoke to the school, they say it is unlikely that there is going to be that much movement. They also said they disregard what the priests reference said about compassionate grounds, and went on attendance only. (Illness and moving abroad to look after my elderly parents)

Should I regards this as just jitters, and give his chosen school a go, or should we get back onto the waiting list to his state offer?

I agree that you shouldn't change plans simply on the basis of a wobble now but in your shoes I would be asking to go back on the state school's waiting list now. If you were close enough to the top of their admissions criteria to get the place initially, you should also be highly placed on the waiting list. You may even be offered a place before September and there's no penalty (apart from embarrassment) if you turn it down again later. At least that way, if things do go pear-shaped in September - or if another change in your financial situation makes fees difficult - you know what your fallback option is.