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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

The Trinity-Whitgift thread of 2013 continued

860 replies

Somelikeithott · 16/02/2013 16:46

Hi all as I posted on previous thread, I realised we had hit the 1000 mark, do felt obliged to open a new one. Hope everyone finds this thread easily

OP posts:
NotADragonOfSoup · 11/03/2013 10:14

8:30 - 11:30

Croydonmumtods · 11/03/2013 10:27

Whitgift school shop uniform list states 'parents of new boys must schedule an appointment with the school shop by end of April 2013'. Yikes I best get my skates on. The Whitgift secondhand sale was apparently on saturday last 10.30-12 so we've missed that one but believe there is another one after half term in the summer.

burntoutdad · 11/03/2013 10:40

Mis - shouldn't really grace you with a reply but you are now posting wrong information to new parents, so here goes.
As hot mentioned there was indeed a second hand sale, I thought I would take a look see if i could get spare pe kit (some advice from mumsnetter on here) and then revisit for next one if i couldn't. For anyone with genuine interest the next sale is in June, but as the pe kit is relatively new there was not any on sale and unlikely to be (or sparse) at next sale either.
Anyway whilst there I noticed the shop was open was went to take a look and ended up buying bags (they need at least 3 - backpack, sports bag, swimming bag) and some other kit.
And this is where your information is wrong -
New parents will be asked to make appointments for fitting around April time (not August as this is when the masses form long queues). The boys have a fitting session (growth taken into account, and MIS- there are not really that many sizes to consider for some kit S,M,L) and uniform is ordered/bought.
If the DS has a spurt in the time between April and Sept (some will) you can take stuff back to exchange (new parents also given longer return periods)
All this info is from the lovely lady in the shop btw not my supposed 'inside knowledge'.
Mis please tell me where this is confusing or 'perplexing' apart from being contrary to what you have heard and maybe I can help you a little?
The 'network' comment came directly from another parent at the school who's DS has benifited from it, before you can say that there is no substance I suggest you do as much research as I have. I have also spoken to a old Whitgiftian (in late 70's) who still attends meetings etc and has told me he is always welcome at the school. Just in case you are still in doubt a simple click of a mouse button will take you to the Old Whitgiftian Association from the school homepage.
Are you trying to 'censor' my posts? do you not want the balanced view that you are so desperate for, some positive some negative?
I would strongly suggest that you speak to your son and his DS and find more out about the school before misguiding others on forums like this, perhaps you haven't explored enough to get the most out of the school or have sent DS with such a negative attitude that the potential opportunities haven't been realised for you.
Not sure what your problem is but I can answer (if I wish) anything you throw at me because ive nothing to hide, im a genuine poster with a positive outlook on life and will post whenever, whatever I like.

NotADragonOfSoup · 11/03/2013 10:45

Did you remember to ask for your staff discount, Burnt Wink

Lfs2126 · 11/03/2013 10:47

burnt -you are doing exactly the right thing making your appointment early. Easter probs a bit keen but don't leave it too long into summer would be my adviceSmile . the excellent shop staff are well versed in kitting your son out with what he will need ( with the growth factor!) need to remember that as well as the new chaps, there will always be old hands like me popping in for 'top up' bits and bobs, so the appt system is vital when your buying the full kit for the first time. plus the school shop usually shuts for 3 weeks approx in august.

NotADragonOfSoup · 11/03/2013 10:53

Planning uniform early also applies to T. Either turn up at Hewitts at opening time (which I think is 9am most days) or, when it gets to prime uniform buying time, you can make evening appointments I believe.

If you are buying school shoes from Clarkes near the end of the summer holidays, you can book an appointment online which saves queuing time!

cheammum · 11/03/2013 10:53

Croydonmumtods..thanks for that info...remember doing first uniform fitting for my Ds at Nonsuch....had to wait and queue for a tiring 2 hours (fittings were only done on a first come first served basis 1 week in July); didn't realise how much kit there was to buy initially.

Sounds like a good idea to have a uniform fitting on an appointment basis at W..probably saves a lot of time in the long run..and you've then got enough time to get organised before the well earned summer holidays Smile.

cheammum · 11/03/2013 10:55

typo mistake...mean't to say Dd (daughter) at Nonsuch.

Lfs2126 · 11/03/2013 10:57

oh god yes the shoe thing.if circs allow I would buy 2 pairs to rotate if poss. a couple of games of footy on a muddy puntabout(w) and you'll know what I meanGrin

cheammum · 11/03/2013 11:14

Lfs2126...know exactly what you mean...in my case my usually sensible and organised Dd mangaged to lose her coat the first week then her shoes within a month of starting high school...turned up eventually...so God help me in Sept with my (hmm..how shall we put it kindly) somewhat forgetful Ds Wink.

frazzledforty · 11/03/2013 11:17

Been following the thread - thanks for all the valuable input. DS is starting W in Sept and am a little nervous about practical matters. I think this will apply to any school!

What are you planning to do ito mobiles for your DSs? Am very reluctant to get an 11 yo a phone, but I guess we have little choice? I will initially do the school run, but he'll move to the bus as soon as I know he won't go all the way to Brighton. Which phones work best for their purposes and what kind of contracts/plans are they on? I would like to limit him, but still ensure he has enough minutes to get hold of me in an emergency.

Does any of the old hands have any practical advice on the language choices? DS comes from the state sector and his French is limited to "bonjour" and counting to 20.. will he be very far behind the others if he chose French? I think Spanish is very useful too, as is Mandarin, obviously.. how do you choose?

NotADragonOfSoup · 11/03/2013 11:22

DSs have pay as you go phones.

In DS1's case, a £7.99 one from the O2 shop because he lost his iPhone (it was my old one so I wasn't overly bothered but wasn't prepared to replace it with anything above £10!) This cheap one does everything he needs it to.

WRT languages, DSs both came from state school with no previous language experience and it hasn't been an issue. I chose Spanish as they go there a lot and they were allocated German as their second language. As I was unsure of their language ability, I didn't go for Mandarin, even though DSs longest serving friend was running a personal campaign to get all his friends to choose it so they'd be in the same class!

suz742 · 11/03/2013 11:33

The Whitgift old boys network - my uncle is 75 and attends his class annual reunion dinner and any W plays etc and has a strong relationship with the school. He received a full fees academic scholarship post war
I'm not so keen on the 'old school tie' network. I don't want my T boy to be treated any differently to his state educated siblings who work hard to build careers. The T HM at his open day speech stresses the importance of this and I was very relieved to hear the emphasis on emotional intelligence rather than private school links. The tone of the T letters and the charity work promoted fills me with great hope that supporting others is such an important life lesson,more so than any A* star achieved!

cheammum · 11/03/2013 11:52

frazzledforty...not an expert on the best mobile phone contract/plans currently available...but I would say yes..definitely get Ds a standard inexpensive phone before he starts in September... so for your own peace of mind he can at least contact you after school and just confirm his whereabouts etc.

Dd not allowed to be seen with mobile phone at Nonsuch school...if it rings while in a lesson or if seen with it in school building it is confiscated and it then has to be collected by parent..so it is advisable that it is either switched off straight away at the start of the school day to prevent any unnecessary trips up to the school.

With regards to language choices, I have been told by admisssion department, that you get a choice of 3 languages, and they try to accommodate your top 2 choices if possible...So like me, my Ds is not great at French...so it might probably be best to put Spanish as one of your priority choices.

There is a wealth of info on the website with regards to rules and policies..but quite a lot to absorb and take in.

So maybe an existing parent could kindly break it down for us gently Confused.

Seeline · 11/03/2013 11:58

My DS has a basic pay-as-you-go phone which serves its purpose well ATM. He is not into texting mates yet so for texting me when pick up time has changed, or letting me know he is getting the bus etc it is ideal. At T boys have to put phones in their locker for the day until Y3, and have to ask permission if they need to use them during the day which seems to work well.

GetMeOut · 11/03/2013 12:07

It makes sense to get all the uniform early because of the many labels to be sewn on/ in/ indelibly marked on every conceivable piece of kit ( plus mufti clothes that they take on the trips in Sept ) Smile

Somelikeithott · 11/03/2013 12:07

Welcome frazzled and thanks for your mobile phone enquiry, that's one we've been thinking about for a while. Either give DS our old iPhone or get him cheap new one. After reading posts I'm more inclined to do the latter.

Also think we will get it 2 months or so, before he starts, so he can get used to the idea of owning a phone and the novelty has worn off when he starts ( hopefully I'm not being naive). So he doesn't feel the need to flash it around when he is out and about by himself when he starts 'big' school.

I've also heard the boys are sometimes targeted for mugging, hence advice to walk in groups where possible. So will have to have a chat with DS about that one as well.

Cheammum, is that 3 languages in year 6 or 7, or both? Lots to think about eh!

OP posts:
Seeline · 11/03/2013 12:12

Definitely recommend getting an evening appointment at Hewitts for T uniform. We went at the beginning of the summer holidays and had a lovely girl serving us on a one-to-one basis. She was very knowledgable about the uniform, made endless trips to the stock room for different sizes to try on, and even stopped us buying a lab coat as the school had their own but hadn't taken it off our kit list. It does take ages to sew on all the name tags - especially the special ones for sports kit which are huge if your DS has a long name Smile

NotADragonOfSoup · 11/03/2013 12:13

I would definitely go with a cheap phone for at least the first year. I've told DS2 that provided he keeps DS1's old phone safe for a year he can have a better one (probably my current iPhone which will then be due for upgrade)

On phone safety tip is that if someone asks them the time, they shouldn't get their phone out to check. Not a problem if they have a cheap phone but it is an easy way for someone to get their hands on something like an iPhone.

burntoutdad · 11/03/2013 12:22

Frazzledforty - we have been thinking of phones also. Tesco have a Samsung Ace free for £10.00/mth. No idea if they would use that much? but this gives a cheap smartphone alternative which isn't that desirable to others and gives internet access (can be blocked if necessary) and calendar, schedule etc.

Didn't think of the two pairs of shoes, we've been years with DS walking around with muddy shoes covered in bits of sponge balls.

Lfs2126 - Yes the lady in the shop was very helpful and knowledgeable about all kinds things related to the school. Some tips she gave -

  • if blazer sleeves too long (to allow growth) turn sleeve inside out and sew crease in lining at elbow which holds up sleeve and can be let go later.
  • All boys have same bag so personalise the bag i.e. keyring etc so it can be spotted easily in a pile. Match keying's to other bags too.
  • The little gadget/valuables bags are useful to put, watches, money etc. before sports and hand to teacher to put away safely. Remember outside schools etc sometimes come to use the pool.
  • The swimming lockers are small and so the smaller swimming bags are more practical than the large sports bag.

The blazers are quite thick so your DS might not need to wear a jumper under if he is one that hot all the time (like mine).

Label, Label, Label everything!

suz742 - I know what you mean about 'old school tie network' and ive always felt the same to be honest, but it does go on. I was actually referring though to available help and advice resource rather than 'funny handshake and your in old chap' Smile

With regards to travel, the W school rules handbook (on website) gives guidance on the walking route to school from the station taking into account busy roads, safer crossings and police patrols.

DivaMum23 · 11/03/2013 12:23

Frazzledforty- Gave my son a PAYG which he keeps in the inside pocket of his blazer, he only use it to let me know when matches or after school events are cancelled.

suz742 ?both school runs and old boy?s network Trinity is TMWA the ?old? was removed when they renamed it couple of years ago there is a link on T website

frazzledforty · 11/03/2013 12:24

Thank you everyone!

Really good advice - yes, we'll get cheapest phone option. I was worried there might be peer pressure to get the latest and most expensive BB or iPhone. Am relieved that's not an issue. He's thankfully oblivious to brand names and I'd like his naivete to last a while still.

I was concerned about phone safety and becoming a target too. It's sad that we have to even discuss it, but at least I can prepare DS. Hott - it sounds like a good idea to get phone earlier. It's given me the idea to get it for DS for his 11th birthday (still coming up) so that the novelty can wear off and he can learn to look after it (there's no hopeful smiley, is there?)

Somelikeithott · 11/03/2013 12:26

Thanks soupy for that tip. All these practical tips coming out are invaluable. Amazing the things we 'worry' about, and there are simple practical answers for.

OP posts:
frazzledforty · 11/03/2013 12:31

Burnt - thanks for the advice on blazer and sleeves.

DS is a midget (oh dear, hope am not outing him) and I fear he may drown in even the smallest sizes. Not sure my sewing will be up to scratch, though, but I guess I can take it to a tailor if needs be?

May I also ask - sorry I'm on a roll - how easy it is to get to know other parents? We don't know anyone at W and while I know that it's very different to primary school, it must be useful to know someone in he same year group to use as a sounding board?

JohnnyT · 11/03/2013 12:32

I very much appreciate the way the thread has focused on more practical matters. Certainly I'd hope we can move on now that we've all made our decisions. Let's just say we've all made the right and best decisions based on all the evidence. Yes, some of us do have more DS's to consider in years to come but that can wait at least until the DS that we've focused on gets settled in school. I would still love to know if there's going to be a way of staying in touch with current parents at W (or T for that matter) during the school year? By the way, a few more days of lively exchanges and we'll be back at the 1000 limit!