Please help-son may drop out of 6th form

[kazzymac]

Need some advice please. Son is studying a level history and English language along with B tech biology. He had struggled with the English for a while and tonight has said that he can't see him passing so might as well drop out. He just doesn't get it. I've told him to see his teacher tomorrow and write a list of everything he doesn't get and see what she suggests. He doesn't want to go to uni so I'm not sure what to say. It's hard when your 6ft 18 year old is in tears. Any help please?

Sorry no advice but I couldn't just leave your post.
Don't a lot of students just study or a btec? So dropping down to 1 A level plus btec if that's what he eventually decides will still give him a good set of qualifications surely?
And I don't care how tall my boys get (both over 6 foot), they're still my babies, and its even more heart breaking when they're so big but sad.

For what it's worth, my nephew dropped out at the end if his first year of 6th form (didn't even do the exams) much to the worry of his parents. He tried various jobs (bar/coffee shop etc) but suddenly things 'clicked' and a year ago he found a great job (career) with on the job training and great prospects. Education is important but not always the be all and end all. Any chance of him accessing some good careers advice or even swapping to a different school/college? Sometimes a different approach can help. Or having a goal (job/career) in mind can help in reexamining a level choices. Good luck!

Thank you both. I'm feeling better after your posts. We have had a hug and tried to look on the positive. Will see what the teachers say tomorrow. I'm hoping that everything will click into place for him at some stage. It's a tough world out there for them at the moment. Thanks again

No real advice, other than perhaps, if he will let you, trying to talk to his teachers with him. It may be it is not for him, or it may be he is just struggling with the step up fro GCSE. And an adult's perspective on that may help.

But mainly, I wanted to say it is a tough world for them now, you are so right. If they watch the news, or read the papers, then they have relentless exams that are widely derided (by people who don't have to sit them), and then they can look forward to working hard for low pay with high housing costs till old age, to support the two previous generations who have messed up. Not necessarily the reality, quite, but pretty darn depressing if you are 16 I think.

I'm glad you had a hug. Encourage him to take his time with any decisions, and to talk to people like teachers openly.

Will they let him drop one subject and continue with the others?

I would look through other options with him. The sixth form should have a careers adviser who can talk to him about what his other options are - apprenticeship, work with training etc.

If he still wants to drop out, could you talk to him about staying in sixth form and just doing the minimum while looking for a job or apprenticeship? In some areas 10-15% of people his age are unemployed and doing nothing, which is hugely demoralising. Better to do something every day (and presumably see his friends?) even if he isn't enjoying it much rather than be sat at home.

Sorry I didn't say in my earlier post that he is 18 in may and sitting his a levels in June with some resits coming up in jan. I think he feels under pressure and time is running out for him. He is doing well in the b tech heading for a merit/distinction and a b grade in history. It's just the English language. I have no problem going in with him but will see what comes of his meeting with his teacher. He would ideally like to join the police but that is so hard to get into - not much recruiting going on. I'm not sure what the impact will be if he dropped English - maybe a happier son?? It's so difficult but I do appreciate everyone's comments-will keep the dialogue open with him & be there for hugs if needed

Have you asked him whether he just really dislikes English, or whether he'd love to have that qualification but is finding it tough going? If it's the first, drop it, but if it's the second, I bet you can help him pass it.

Can he be specific about what he finds hard? Is it the essay structuring? The set texts? Grammar? Can he break it down even further? Then he can go over the things that he's struggling with, piece by piece.

No shame in finding something difficult, or working hard and scraping a pass. It's a good lesson to learn that not everything worth doing comes easily to us.

But if he just hates it - I think he's too young to stick with something he loathes. He's at the age to cast around and work out what makes him tick. A levels should be subjects you look forward to, having finally been allowed to drop all the compulsory stuff you hated at GCSE level.

No update yet but he has booked a meeting with his teacher for tomorrow. He is more positive today & said that he doesn't want to leave as it would be a shame to waste the work he has put in so far so maybe the hug worked! I think he has found English difficult & buried his head in the sand making it harder to keep up. He loves history so finds it easier & importantly interesting-no issues with this subject. He's not specific with what he finds hard about English- just says all of it in typical teenage fashion! have asked him to find out the exam board so can get him some revision guides. I'll wait until he has seen the teacher before deciding how to approach it but suggested that he looks into the implication of giving up English-an option not explored at all before coming on here so thank you as your thoughts are helping to keep the discussions

Silly phone -should end with going