Moving DS to new school?

[loopyluna]

Hi,
I'm new on mumsnet. I hope I'm posting in the right place! I'm a mum of 3 (ds, 12 and dds 10 and 6). We live abroad so different school system but I'd love your opinions on a tough decision I'm trying to make.

It's a long story but basically, for several reasons, I'm not at all happy with ds's current senior school (he's in his 2nd year) and have decided to send dd to a different seniors in September.
The current school is inconvenient to get to and has a real lack of structure and discipline. DS has got a stinking attitude at the moment and his school work is suffering.
The new school seems great -much closer to home, smaller, friendlier and a lot stricter. DD is really happy to be going there but DS doesn't want to change and seems to think that we have no right to make him change.

So, question is, is it better to leave ds in a bad school and take our chances or move him to a better school but take the risk of him being unhappy?

Any thoughts?

Why doesn't he want to move? Does he thinks he's going to have to work harder in the new school or perhaps he worried about leaving friends or just being an awkward nearly teenage boy? Can he stay at his school if he agrees to improve his attitude to school work but also on the proviso that you will move him to the new school if he doesn't?

Exactly those two reasons -he doesn't want to leave his friends (although he's always falling out with them) and he won't admit it, but I think he's scared that he'll have to pull his socks up and work harder in the other school!
I did originally start by saying he would have to change schools if he didn't start working harder and being less cheeky but he hasn't changed his behaviour at all so I don't think that's working.
I just think that he's too young to know what's good for him (god, I sound like my grandmother) and I really should be calling the shots here...

Ok you've given him an ultimatum change or move he hasn't changed so I think your going to have to move him. He'll make new friends at the new school my DS1 joined his school in yr9 and has made lots of friends. IME if your positive and happy eventually your DS will pick up on this and feel the same.

I agree with happy - he's had fair warning and hasn't pulled his socks up so now it's time to follow through and move him.

From the sound of it, you don't really have much to lose - he is on a downward slope where he is.

A change of friends would probably be good for him, even though he does not see it at the moment. I wouldn't be surprised if he is soon thanking you though. It is just the fear of the unknown that is bothering him.