Unisex toilets in Secondary School

[WC]

DDs secondary school (Holland Park, in west London) is currently being rebuilt and the new building is nearly ready. I have just read in a newsletter that instead of separate girls and boys toilets there are going to be unisex toilets for all. My initial thought was that it was really weird and DD doesn't like it. I was just wondering if this was usual in new builds these days and if others have experience of schools doing this.

Because girls don't go to the loo at school but hold it in until they get home. They avoid drinking during the day to enable this.

Business Trills, This is not about me - I asked whether anyone had come across this before hoping for some reassuring comments not a personal attack on me. BTW DD's primary had shared boy and girl toilets in school at one point where the floor and seats were literally soaked with piss. They separated them after just the issues described here of girls refusing to go or wetting themselves.

Male piss is stinky to females I'm afraid, even if you don't believe it. Personally I have had to share work toilets which were covered in shit and use washbasins which males had used to piss in. The issue is more about whether shared toilets give potential for sexist comments and harassment of girls. Racist and homophobic abuse at the school are stamped on, but boys can apparently make whatever abusive comment they want to girls.

I think its incredably naive to imagine perving and other foolishness wont go on in unisex loos tbh.

I wouldnt want to use unisex loos as an adult (unless it was a portaloo at a festival or something) so I can easily imagine why teenagers of either gender wouldnt want to.

Bound to cause a higher incidence of UTIs, constipation, dehydration and not eating at school.

It's about you and about everyone who finds being in a cubicle next to a man/boy significantly different to being in a cubicle next to a woman/girl.

Piss and shit everywhere is about common politeness, not about gender. I've been in female toilets where there has been blood on seats and walls. I didn't think "woman are disgusting", I thought "some people are disgusting".

It's not about worrying who is in the next cubicle, it is about who has just used it, the state it is in and the comments and baner when you get out.

who has just used it - doesn't matter, why would it?

the state it is in - relates to common politeness and decency, not gender

baner when you get out - no idea what that is

Typo - banter!

If they are going to be cubicles with washbasins inside, like most disabled toilets, I wouldn't see that as a problem. If they're just a row of stalls with shared sinks etc, I would be really unhappy about it. I remember being terribly embarrassed when I was at school and had my period, having to rip open a pad or a tampon wrapper - I hated the idea of anyone being able to hear what I was doing, and that was just in the girl's loos.

Yes, I'm sure the children using the loos are totally fine with it!
What about the ones who are just not going? I would have absolutely hated unisex loos as a child - and knowing what I was like I would have avoided going at all costs.

Not giving girls a private, safe space where they can learn to deal with their periods is imo cruel and potentially damaging to some children. I agree with steamedTS - I was just like that.
I feel strongly about the issue, and would put unisex loos on the Cons list when comparing schools for my kids.

Are the schools really saying they can't handle bullying in loos any other way??
Someone should do a proper survey and find out how young girls really feel about this.

(I'm concerned about it from the girls' point of view, because I have girls and am thinking about it from my own personal experience. But maybe there are also issues for boys?)

Steamed - so true!
Imagine ripping open a wrapper, taking ages in the cubicle (because sometimes it just does) and coming out to realise the boy you secretly fancy was in the cubicle next door. Now you think he knows you are on your period, oh joy. I think for a 13 or 14 yo girl that must be absolutely horrible and humiliating.

If its the noise of a tampon wrapper ripping which is the problem, what difference does it make whether the sink is in the cubicle or not?

I have decided that I wont send my dc to a school with unisex loos - unless they absolutely dont have a problem with it. 'Deal breaker' for me.

New build (2005) primary schools near us have separate girls and boys- i cant see why it should be any different at secondary level.

DD 14 secondary has normal loos and she won't go at school if she can help it. She is often seen doing the wee dance on the door step when she gets home from school.

DS 16 has an after school job at the local sports centre and thinks the ladies changing room and loos are far more disgusting than the mens.

and I have not heard any complaint about the loos at the new build school I talked about above.

TBH, this noise of a wrapper being opened thing, isn't an issue. The toilets are used at break times and lunch times. There are approx 300 kids, all milling around, waiting to use the loos, or chatting. 300 kids make a lot of noise!

Too much noise to hear a wrapper being opened and frankly too much giggling and catching up with the gossip to care what someone is doing in the toilet!

yuck it sounds horrendous. I would hate it and agree with most of the reasons outlined here.

boys are revolting and sometimes pee on seats and don't flush the loo. This happens in my household and it could be my DS or DH.

one of my first-term experiences as a secondary school teacher was to be called to a boys toilet by a girl in tears as her friend had been dragged in and was being gang raped.

unisex toilets do not work for me.

as horrendous as your experience is lovebunny - wouldn't unisex toilets help to combat anything like that happening in the future?

Awful, awful idea. Think teen boy + mobile phone + girl in next cubicle = too tempting to resist. I know a grown man who took a video on his phone in unisex swimming pool changing rooms / toilets because a teenage girl was in next door. He was an adult who couldn't resist a moment of stupidity. Imagine the self-control of the average teenage boy.

How would these loos be "policed" by staff - which gender of staff could be sent in without "risk" of accusations of some sort of perverted behaviour (there will be some kid who will try this on).

And as others have said general hygiene is important - boys can be really messy and foul in toilets. I would hate using a unisex toilet so can only imagine the horror of having to use one as a teenager.

I agree entirely that you need separate ones, but I will mark this thread as a link next time women are insisting on taking their DSs in the ladies and the girls just have to lump it-or they are insisting everywhere should have unisex loos.
Obviously girls are bothered.

How do all these horrified people cope on long haul flights

Stealth, by cubicles with sinks in I meant the totally enclosed type that disabled loos are often like - proper rooms as opposed to cubicles with gaps above and below sides/doors, IYSWIM? They're more soundproof and it's also much easier to wash blood etc off your hands discreetly if you've been dealing with a tampon or something.

I started my period in the middle of a school day. Completely flooded, the blood was even on my ankle socks . Luckily there was two older girls in the toilet who sorted me out, even down to washing my socks off for me and drying them under the hand dryer,bless them.

I would have died off if boys had have been in there.

Awful, awful idea.

I think any school wishing to have unisex toilets should canvas the children as to whether they want them.