Single sex vs Co-ed for DS

[Trix2323]

Can anyone help me think about the pros and cons of single sex vs co-ed schools for DS age 13? He would be there for five years.

I am shortly going to have to make a decision between two schools. Both are boarding schools and DS would be a full boarder.

The co-ed school in question is logistically quite a bit trickier - to what extent should that be a consideration?

Mmmmm
Pros of single sex:
-More chance of him concentrating on his work
-Less reason to show off or play up in class
-More opportunity to be himself- in a single sex school it's easier to like poetry or similar as a boy than in a mixed school

• Whole place will be geared towards boys and staff will generally be people who particularly enjoy teenaged boys. Boys schools know how boys learn, which I think really is somewhat different from the way in which girls learn

-I think that boys that age generally enjoy the cameraderie of being all boys together

Cons:
Risk that he may come out immature in his dealings with girls; but most single sex boys' schools I know are swarming with girls at weekends and for plays etc
Co-ed will generally have a rather gentler atmosphere, which will suit some boys better
co-ed is arguably more "normal"

As far as logistics are concerned, I think that it is v important with a boarding prep but less so for over 13- they come home less and you visit less.

Which school does your son prefer? I think that's quite important

Thank you so much vixatis for your helpful input.

DS strongly prefer the all-boys school. He cannot really articulate why. DH prefers it because of logistics. I like the idea of the all-boys school for the reasons that you mention as ?pros?. I especially like the idea that the teachers self-select in because they like teaching teenage boys ? not all teachers do.

I don?t think the risks associated with all boys are too much of a worry for him ? he has a sister, and is at a co-ed prep and the girls at his previous school seemed to like him and include him in their games, so I am not worried about how he will relate to women in the future. He likes to play lots of sport and insists he will be fine in a ?boysy? environment.

I prefer the way the catering is organised at the co-ed, where they have meals in boarding houses with teachers sitting at each table. I don?t think that happens at the boys school, but I am not sure. In any case, perhaps this would not be a good basis on which to decide on a school.

My DS (now at university) loved his all-boys school. He has always had loads of girl friends. His relationship with his girlfriend seems pretty healthy and grown-up to me. His adolescence was comparatively angst-free but I can't be sure that was down to single-sex education. My guess is that it contributed.

Statistically boys do better in mixed in terms of academic achievement (am teacher do not have link to specific papers). However, I would choose on how I felt about the school.

I think you will find that boys in the independent sector do equally well in single sex or mixed the results of schools like St Pauls (top of FT league tables with a gob smacking 94% getting A?s a A level) Winchester, Harrow, Eton and even the relatively unselective Radley are testimony to this.
Now my DS is at boys only senior having been in a mixed prep I really like it. Mainly male teachers who are very strong role models, very boy orientated activities especially games just a general all round boyishness that I think suits him. Basically my DS?s really school understands boys. The other beauty of his school is that it is exceedingly housecentric I wonder if there were girls in the school whether this would cease to be quite the case.

Trix123 "I prefer the way the catering is organised at the co-ed, where they have meals in boarding houses with teachers sitting at each table."
At Win Coll the boys eat all their meals in their boarding houses with the housemaster and matron. The teachers all live around the school and as there is no staff dining room they too eat their lunches in the houses with the boys. In my sons house the housemaster?s wife and children also eat with the boys and parents viewing the boarding houses are also often invited for lunch. The same thing happens in some of the houses at Eton as well and I believe Tonbridge although this only has a small number of full boarders and about 45% day children. Hope this helps.

In my sons house the housemaster?s wife and children also eat with the boys and parents viewing the boarding houses are also often invited for lunch.

Yes, that happened when we visited the co-ed. I was most impressed with the atmosphere. The all-boys school I am considering has a refectory instead for three meals per day, which I think is less good than the meals-in-house option in terms of ethos.

I have left it too late for the others that you mention, except possibly Tonbridge.

I think if you're too late for either Win Coll or Eton then your too late for Tonbridge as well.
One of the many reasons why we chose Win Coll is the dining arrangements.

I'm guessing Radley?

Radley dont eat in house!

I think if you're too late for either Win Coll or Eton then your too late for Tonbridge as well.

Maybe. But I would have thought a school that had day students might find it easy enough to fit an extra boarder in, unlike the all-boarding schools that have to match numbers of students to numbers of beds. I have the impression that there are a few beds vacant at almost all boarding schools.

One of the many reasons why we chose Win Coll is the dining arrangements.

Dining arrangements there sound good, although I have heard less than good things about the food.

The best boarding environment is full boarding but I think where there are a large number of boarders at a school - not necessarily percentage but numbers - then boarding is fine. Tonbridge is a good option. I even heard that Dulwich College have boarding spaces although it is very much a day school.

happygardening, I know Radley eat in Hall. I thought OP's chosen boys school ate centrally (as at adley) and that she would prefer her DS to eat in his house (or social).

The food at Win Coll varies from house to house because it is organised by the individual matrons and cooked in house.
Sorry grovel you're right memeory is playing up tonight!