Dyslexic, not Einstein, need perspective please - teachers? anyone?

[boschy]

OK, sorry this might be a bit long and rambly, but I am stressing!

This is about DD1 who is 15, in Y10, Sept baby so one of the oldest in her year. She is 'moderately' dyslexic and also not that academically bright (score of about 87 in whatever that score thingy is) - so she struggles.

She works very very hard; is super sociable, generally popular; adults mostly love her because she is polite, but she has lots of friends, both girls and boys. Generally what most would call a 'nice' kid. Doing the usual essential GCSEs plus Humanities, Media Studies and Drama Btech.

She is doing well at school given her levels - ie achieving or slightly above her targets, which are not that high, but she's hitting the mark and I know school will work with her to get her the results. Although she is not academic in any way shape or form, she is by no means stupid - has great empathy, is very perceptive, there are no flies on my baby!

I am slightly in despair because she cannot get her ideas straight - eg have just typed up her drama logbook for her tonight (after a big row because she announced at 9pm it had to be in tomorrow). Her handwriting and spelling and sentence structure are APPALLING and although she can talk the hind leg off the donkey on anything to do with certain subjects (anything from RPatz to Kony!), she cannot seem to translate this into her work. She loves drama, wants to be an actress/work in the theatre/be a drama teacher, but she cant seem to explain her ideas, either written or verbally in this context. (I think she also lacks the confidence to make a career in the theatre, but obviously I wouldnt tell her that).

The school is/has been great; she is regularly tested via the AEN provision to establish levels and what further support could be needed - tho she is adamant she doesnt need any (eg thinks extra time in GCSEs wouldnt actually help her); some teachers will give her a printed homework instruction rather than expect her to write it down from dictation or off the whiteboard; her Humanities teacher who is a wonderful dragon says she doesnt need to do all the homework because her contribution in class is good.

I am struggling I suppose because I want to help her more - she's got to get some respectable grades after all; and my business is all about words, so I find it very hard to cope with the fact that she finds writing (or typing or spelling) so difficult... and because literacy is so easy and natural for me, I almost take it as read that if you can't write fluently then you're not that bright (sorry, that sounds awful, but am trying to explain)

I suppose what I am wondering is can I ask school to give her more help, and if so what/how? how can I help her more at home? and am I just being an over-anxious mummy who thinks because she wont get 15 A* at GCSE she'll never be able to achieve anything?

Hi my DS is "significantly dyslexic", luckily has a strength for science and maths. Does she use a laptop at all for homework? I find my son's work is so much better with a laptop. They need to be using it every day to get up speed and for it to be "their usual way of working". We've been told our son can use it in school but still waiting for it to happen. He also gets 25% extra time, which is just enough to help in maths and science doesn't help much in English and other essay based work, really needs the laptop to help the presentation, omissions and general crossings out and scribbles. It also helps with organisation of thought, the extra time allows him to reread his work and make (scribbly) alterations.
I'd like to know why there is so much help in higher education for dyslexia but the help you need to get there is so sadly lacking.

PS he's not Einstein either! Can relate on the empathy and perception side of things. He's a super person to be around, teachers say he has charisma, pity that can't get you through your GSCEs but it'll sure help in life!

That's typical dyslexic -does she have 'inspiration' on her computer? You can basically type all your ideas, then make links to make it into a mind map and it then convert it to an essay plan.

There are a couple of other programs that help. She NEEDS a computer to present work better, and it will also improve her spelling.

thank lelly and sashh; school have previously said no to a laptop in class because the exams still have to be written by hand - I will reinvestigate that one. (she is never off the laptop at home, but mostly on facebook!! but for example last night she put up a beautifully written, well-spelt and eloquent post explaining Kony to some of her friends who did not know about it... why can't she do this for school work?)

not heard of 'inspiration' so will investigate - what are the others you mentioned sashh?

I'm in school today for something else and will have a chat with her guidance manager as to where to go next.

Do the exams absolutely have to be handwritten? I ask because when I did A-levels (a fair while ago now though!), my bf had an amanuensis for one set and typed his answers on a computer (supervised, it required special permission etc), for another. If it could make the difference between passing and failing the exams it's worth asking if she can take them on a laptop.

DS now yr 11, was diagnosed by Ed Psch end of year 9 (to cover his GCSES). He has a reader, 25% extra time, uses a laptop, has a scribe for some multiple choice type questions (he has convergence issues which mean he cant see patterns or words or numbers, sigh). It has made a HUGE difference. We had parents evening last night and he is now predicited some A*, some A's and then a few B's. In year 9 he was expected to get all C's (school dont do less than C ) yesterday two teachers said they would have been surprised back then if he would have gotten D's!
Get into school and ask for the help, explain to DD how she will progress in leaps and bounds and to be honest the other kids dont care and she will need all the help she can get. Ds is chatty sociable popular with teachers, a nice kid, but it doesnt cut the mustard for a job.

Meant to say he doesnt hand write anything.

My DC too uses a laptop in exams. He was tested and was allowed to use one as his writing was very slow. I believe also that if the laptop is used it has to be their normal way daily of working too.

IdontknowwhyIcare, that is brilliant, well done your boy!

Just had a chat with the guidance manager who is going to investigate for me and see what can be done, so wheels are in motion at least, certainly with things like extra exam time and possibly some extra english support (which should rub off onto other written subjects). She says she doesnt actually mind writing (although I think she writes slowly and letters are poorly formed), but just bringing together the physical skills and the mental skill of being able to not just remember but automatically know the spelling must be an effort.

I will ask if she can be tested for writing speed, I'm not sure if that has happened or not - does that test include accuracy as well?

What I find really hard is knowing whether I am expecting too much - whether I'm judging her from too high a literacy standard (ie mine) or whether what she is doing is really good enough to get her the grades she is predicted, which are mostly Cs.

I dont mean to say that I am judging her to her face, or pressurising her, but simply that I dont know...

Boschy I was reading your post for my own daughters who both have SEN, but thought you may be interested in hearing about me instead. I couldn't spell and my writing was awful while at school and at that time they had no such thing as Dyslexia, I'm 45 now.

I did leave school with very few exams but that was probably more down to my behaviour. More valuable than any exam was that I learnt to type, I was in the top stream of a Grammar school and had to fight for them to let me do it. Somehow I knew it was important then as I hated writing so much. Over the years i became faster and faster.

The first time I noticed the difference it could make to my academic ability was when I asked if I could hand in my A Level English essays typed instead of written. The teacher called me back and asked if someone else had written the essay for me, she didn't think I was capable of doing such a decent essay. I went onto develop my writing skills through work on my very basic, word processor, and eventually became a journalist, television producer, writing scripts every week and an MA in Journalism.

Typing speeds are so important, as you won't really benefit until you have been typing for a few years and your speeds are good enough to keep up with the speed you think at. I disliked school because I was disorganised and struggled with my long term memory, typical dyslexic problems. These didn't affect my ability as a journalist as I was able to completely take onboard complex stories, understand the importance of angles very quickly and wasn't expected to remember them for more than that day, as once you have filed your story it's over. Pace of school was too slow for me I enjoyed the lesson and probably similar to your daughter had so much to say and great ideas, but struggled to put everything I had learnt into my long term memory, so exams were a struggle.

Discipline and training was important, I was a hard worker and did my fair share in menial jobs learning accuracy, really after school. Worked in a fast food place, and learned to be fast on a till and efficient. It really helps focus the mind, my till was always out but it taught me the importance of minor details in a way school couldn't.

Not sure if this helps but sometimes once out of school a bright and socially intelligent child can blossom with the right tools.

Daisysue2, thank you that is so good to read, and inspirational to have achieved so highly in such a competitive field - takes a lot more than basic literacy!! Top set at grammar - you were (are!) obviously bright and academic to have reached that - not something DD1 could do, which frightens me a bit.

I dont mind what DD1 does as long as she has the opportunity to get there, if that makes sense? so if she wants to be a drama teacher then she needs to get a certain basic level of qualification to move onto the next stage and I want to work out the best way to help her get there.

The world seems SO much more complicated for our children.

I only ended up in the Grammar school by accident as we moved areas and my mum just called the school, said we were Catholic and asked if there was a place. I did do a NVR test if I remember, (which luckily dyslexic children do well in) and they had a chat with me, the head probably just asked me how often I went to mass. It would never happen now would it!

My dd is dropping all subjects apart from her five core subjects and doing the NVQ option. Is that option available to you dd. Plus she is doing her LAMDA exams privately, I think they count as points on the UCAS application form. Not that she will be going to university just something I noticed when reading about the LAMDA and music exams.

Def wouldnt happen now daisysue! good on your mum though!

NVQ not available to DD, they obviously think she will get the grades they've predicted which are mostly C or C/D. in fact she is at level or slightly up on all them except maths - which I know school will sort - and PE - which I really couldnt care less about. Just wish she didnt have to work so hard to do what comes naturally to other people if you know what I mean?

LAMDA is good and does count for points - mine have both done grades in it for the last couple of years, DD1 was 1 point off distinction in the last one (might have been Grade 4, I am so vague about these things!) Has yours done any yet? I think it is good for confidence, discipline etc - also teamwork, some of ours have been monologues and others duologues so they've had to work in pairs with others.

she's only flipping well come home tonight with an A* for RPE!!! so maybe more is going in and coming out again in the right way than I think... not going to give up on how we can help her though, but having a proud mummy moment tonight!