Is there a 'model' anti-bullying policy for secondary schools? Can any teachers or parents link to a half-decent one please?

[YangGuang]

Dd is being bullied and we will go in to school as soon as term starts in Jan. She was in tears on the last day of term; upset for Christmas.

The school policy is a bit feeble.

It would be good to point to a better policy; also to clarify in my head what could be done to stop the bullying without making things much much much worse for dd.

Please help.

Have a look on your local authority website. The Education bit might have some model policies? Try googling " Council Anti-Bullying Policy" or phoning them up - sometimes the sites are pretty labyrinthine. Depending on what form of bullying you're concerned about may also be covered under other policies eg inclusion / equalities policy, anti-harassment policy etc.

Thanks, Grumpla, will look at that.

It's a private school - are they still covered by council regs?

Nope.

Oh, OK - have lost your sympathy now, right?

Sorry I am incandescent and upset; I have looked at the local council policy and I do think the school will be covered by that.

However what I really need is an exemplary school policy that I can take in, and say: why don't you consider some of these ideas?

We had to go private because she was bullied in the state sector. It's bloody well not her fault though.

how old is she? ime it's quite hard to actually get hold of a schools anti bullying policy in the flesh, but the school does have a duty of care to your dd.

we had a year of dd being bullied last year by one particular girl which culminated in dd being physically attacked, so i have a little experience of broaching this subject with the school. have you been into school before to discuss it or will this be the first time?

Maybe contact some charities that deal with bullying. They might have an example or know a place that has one. Sorry your dd is being bullied.

Thanks, both.

We haven't been in yet - am actually grateful we have the Xmas hols to gather resources and calm down.

Not how I wanted to spend Xmas though.

She is just 14.

What happened with your dd, Daenery?

I feel as if the bully would have to be expelled before it would stop, but I'm sure I'm not being rational.

what kind of things are happening?, we had a girl hiding keys in dd's locker to deliberately get her in trouble, stealing things from her, putting stuff in her bag, and then the attacking incident which left dd with bruises and scratches. big mistake i made was having informal chats with the teacher, i should have gone straight to the head and made it official sooner.

ironically in our case, dd and the 'bully' have sorted out their differences and become friends again, but the other girl is being moved to a different school in jan as she is being bullied! obviously she can dish it out but not take it!

there will be others who can offer more advice, i got lots of help when i posted about dd when it was all going on.

here's my thread from last year (i was lucykate back then)

dd is 9, so we're talking primary not high school age.

No you haven't lost my sympathy for your daughter being bullied, just seemed an odd question as kind of the point of an independent school is that it is just that - independent! Seemed a bit odd to me.

If you want a model policy to take in as a basis for starting discussion on the school implementing a more robust policy in the future then it doesn't have to be a local one.

However the only policy the school has to
stick to is it's own, so that may not be the most effective tactic. However woolly their own policy is, the kinds of incident you're describing are surely covered by it? In your position I'd be focusing on your daughter's experience rather than trying to change policy (at this stage) and given that many indie schools are shitting themselves about loss of fees ATM then I would think you are in quite a strong position to demand some action from them.

You might also want to look at their general complaints procedure so you know who to go to next (board?) if you're not happy with the way it's being dealt with initially.

Sorry just realised those incidents were a different poster. Knackered and sleepless here

Whatever happens I think the school are going to be very unlikely to expel another pupil over this - remember that is cash going out the door as far as they are concerned. Not ideal in this economic climate.

If there is one ringleader the chances are there are other people also being bullied by the same person. Any chance your DD might feel able to talk to them about making a joint complaint, working together to stand up to the bully?

Yes, there are definitely other people being bullied by the same person. They are talking to each other.

I have to work out how to minimise further damage to dd, as well as further damage to the other victims.

You could try looking at random schools on the internet to see if they publicise their anti-bullying/behaviour policy. The school my kids go to have key policies, including this one, readily accessible on their website. Like other policies, it's regularly reviewed by the school governors. Not sure if private schools have governors?