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Secondary education

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In tears as to what to do

6 replies

hoxtonbabe · 24/05/2011 21:54

i had my sons annual review as he is statemented, I knew I was going to be annoyed by the end of it as last year when he had just started the senco was on his case but this year tops it.

I was basically told by the independent speech therapist whom my lea pay for to teach at my sons school that is not in my lea that my son spends too much time on the laptop, I do not spend enough time teaching him and encouraging him with reading newspapers, books, and current affairs that would help him with his speech delay and if I did this he would be fine?!?

She did not mention anything about what she was supposed to do or had been doing with him and basically blamed me for the reason my son has a problem with his language skills.

What has hurt the most is that comment is not really one she should be making unless she actually sees what goes on in my house and outside of her remit of what she was actually hired to do. For the last 10months it has been a rollercoaster and just finally coming to terms with having to have to raise the boys alone after partner walked out the door and literally never came back, I had no idea he was leaving and just ran off to another country leaving me to pick up all the peices, naturally this did not go down too well and spent a little time in a mental health unit, social services are doing their bit and I have to see a shrink, so when someone comes along and essentially calls you a crap mother when you have been trying your hardest to keep it together so the kids dont get taken into care it has knocked me for six.

I'm not sure I can deal with this constant battle I have with the senco and speech therapist and seriously considering taking my son out of that school and I certainly do not want the speech therapist near him anymore, but my son takes time to settle and to change schools now may not be the best for him as he starts year 9 in september

OP posts:
cat64 · 24/05/2011 22:48

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hoxtonbabe · 25/05/2011 04:23

Hi, I've only told you a snipet of the 1.5 year battle I have had with thr senco who has done nothing but try to reduce my sons hours of help from the moment she laid eyes on his statement and it appears that the slt and senco are in this together which I should have known was going to happen Once I found out that the slt and senco "know each other"

My local parent partnership are not that great and looks like yet another battle is going to commence between myself and solicitors and the lea/school which I really could have done without as I have too much on my plate as it is, but I need to ask myself is this school right for my child? If the people who are supposed to help are not, and trying everything in their power to keep him from receiving the support, not communicating with me in any way shape or form, not abiding to certain things in the statement and best if all blame me for my sons condition, then surely that should be a no brainer for me but sadly it is not, as I need to think about what the change would do to him so it's a bit of a dammed if I do, dammed if I don't situation :-(

OP posts:
YummyHoney · 25/05/2011 19:00

OP I fear you have far too much on your plate. Suddenly being left alone to cope with DC is enough for anyone to cope with, let alone fighting for your DC.

I think cat has given you some good advice, but I wouldn't take him out of the school as I think you've got enough to cope with right now.

cat64 · 25/05/2011 23:08

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tethersend · 25/05/2011 23:22

You mentioned some SS involvement- does your son have a SW?

fisafiddle · 27/05/2011 10:28

Repost this on the SN Children board OP - many posters there have been through the statementing and AR process and will be able to support you and give useful advice.

Sadly many schools aren't as supportive of children with SEN as they should be and SENCOs aren't always well trained or given enough time or funding to deal with all the different issues that SEN can bring. Schools often have to pay for part or all of the hours specified in a statement out of existing funds, so it would make financial sense for them to try to reduce the hours on a child's statement. In some LAs, any statements under 15 hours don't come with any additional funding.

Parent Partnerships can be variable in different parts of the country, they are supposed to be independent of the LA but as they're funded and trained by them, they are not as impartial as they should be. I'd recommend going to a completely independent charity like IPSEA or SOS SEN.

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