11+ - How do you decide if grammar school is right for your child?

[thaigreencurry]

We have a while before we need to make any decisions as ds is still only in year 4. I just don't know how you make the decision as to whether grammar school is right for your child.

Ds is very talented at Maths and above average in other areas (not massively so). He is very competitive and always wants to be tested so he can improve his score. Likes doing crosswords and maths puzzles etc but hates writing and would rather watch paint dry than sit down and write a report or a diary.

We live in Bucks, Bucks only test on verbal reasoning. Ds would most probably do well in the 11+ as he has an aptitude towards that type of test. I bought one of those Bond verbal reasoning test books and ds completed the test without losing any marks. Being good at tests doesn't automatically mean that he is suited to a grammar school environment though does it? Ds isn't always that motivated to complete his homework and often needs a little push. Does that mean that he would find the pressure of grammar school too much or would it be good for him because it would stop him from coasting?

Lots of friends are already sending their children to tutors but I am reluctant to go down that route, I don't want him to pass the test because he has been coached and then find he struggles with the pace at grammar school. I like him to play in the park when he gets home from school I don't want him to be stuck with his head in a book all the time. He has an August birthday.

Talk to his teachers and see what they think. Talk to parents who have kids at the school and see how their kids are finding it. Go to an open evening and see what you think.

To be honest if he's bright but needs a push to do homework etc then he sounds ideal for a grammar. But be warned our local grammar sets 2 hours of homework a night so not much time for playing in the park. Think it may have been a bit less in Yr 7 to get them used to it.

His teacher feels he has a lot of potential, ds is moving very quickly up the key stage levels which the teacher thinks is due to having an August birthday, in her words he hasn't "peaked" yet. Ds is very chatty and a little disorganised, his teacher said if he chatted less and stopped wasting time looking for his pencils and sitting in the right seat his reading and writing skills could match his maths ability.

When it comes to card games and chess ds can put me to shame as he is very quick thinking but then he will do something like come downstairs in his school uniform on a Sunday like he did today and I think I just can't picture you in a grammar school environment. I'll go to the open days in the autumn when ds is in year 5 and see what we think.

Thai

I am in Bucks too and we are watching our DS with interest. He goes to a prep school in MK and the schools support those children who are interested in grammar schools but the Head is very strict about the whole thing - she won't mince her words if she thinks your DC is not grammar type!

DS is only Y2 so it's too early. I have heard other parents who have been told to expose their kids to as much reading as possible so that their vocabulary grows - even reading instruction manuals, newspaper articles etc

With how you describe him I would worry that if he went to the secondary mod/local comp that he could be with boys not as academic as him and join in the chattering/not bothering to do homework and coast along messing about. Obviously not all comps/secondary moderns are like that but IMO its more likely there than at a grammar.

I know what you mean. DS is very similar to what you describe. He can talk to me about physics theories but would not be able to tell me which teacher he had that day. Our Head suggested we looked at Grammars for him but like your DS he hates to write (turns out he is dyslexic) and I felt that the more old fashioned approach I imagine a Grammar offers would not suit a kid who is bright but quirky. We very lucky that he got into a very academic comp this March.

His score on VR and NVR were very high and would have secured him a place at Grammar but I knew in my heart it was not for him. I also would have had to avoid Grammars that tested by asking for an essay as they did not make a reasonable adjustment for his dyslexia. That was another thing that put me off them.

Thanks everyone. We will have a look at the schools next year and hopefully ds will have matured by then and we will have a clearer idea as to his suitability for grammar/comprehensive school.

VivaLeBeaver that is exactly my concern as you have described me. I was very much a sheep and wanted to fit in with my peer group and I'm worried that ds will follow suit.

Your ds sounds very much like ours at that age - always getting told off for chatting, looking out of the window etc, but he's absolutely fine at grammar.

They all get pushed because the school know that they're more than capable of getting results.

It may take your ds a couple of years to get his nose to the grindstone (we were despairing of ds in yrs 7 and 8), but he now puts the work in and is expected to get almost all A * and A at GCSE in a few months.

Don't bother with tutors and stuff at this age. Just get some books and go over them in yr6.

Thai bright but not always focused boys are exactly what the grammar schools are looking for!

Also, don?t know which bit of Bucks you are in, but bear in mind that the county has both very academic, single-sex grammars and slightly less academic (but still very good) mixed grammars so there?s a range of options open to you.

Just one point, though. Don?t leave looking at books until Y6, the Bucks test are pretty near the start of term. I?d recommend giving yourself about 6 months, so around this time next year. Good luck.

You're right, Mattellie, it was yr5 when we got ds started on the practice books and papers. I forgot!

sounds just like my ds! He sounds perfect for grammar school and if we had them in Sussex I'd have put my ds in for it.

as a by the by, does anyone remember this?

Thai - as Mattellie says, he sounds just what they're looking for.

The schools all have open evenings in September, they are madly busy but can really help you focus.

My ds1 is also in Yr4 and have checked with his school as to whether or not they think he'd be right.

We're doing sudokus and word puzzles with him just now plus making sure he reads lots as they need to have a good vocabulary.

From September we're going to start looking at one question type a week so he knows what to expect. We won't be using private tutors.

The Bucks exam is VERY specific, Bond books will give general questions but you really need to look at specific VR tests.

Dd just sat it last September, PM me if there are any specifics you'd like to ask :)