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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

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Original poster

Wrong school uniform trousers GCSE debacle

103 replies

rarebite · 11/03/2011 22:47

My daughter went to sit her Maths GCSE and was told she could not because she was not in the complete school uniform.

She had on a school T-shirt but the teacher said she must wear a jumbper and she had to squeeze into a year 7/8 jumper which made her feel hot and sweaty.

She was wearing black trousers which the teacher thought too narrow. She told the teacher none of the trousers would fit but was made to try and change in the unisex toilets. Three times she tried 3 different pairs.

When she came out the last time the teacher had gone, the exam room door was closed and my daughter came home in floods of tears.

Was this an appropriate way to handle a possible breach of school uniform policy? I am feeling very upset as she spent hours revising for the exam and I feel a detention more appropriate. She didn't intend to flout the policy - that is why she tried to get into the second hand clothes. She wasn't the only child forced into too small clothes but she was the only one who could find nothing to fit. Now she doesnt feel like going back to school.

OP posts:

exoticfruits · 19/03/2011 09:43

This one is was and is weegiemum-hence the thread!

butterpieify · 19/03/2011 09:45

I finally got allowed to not have to go to every lesson (I still had to be in school, but I could study by myself in the special needs cupboard) in the last half of year 11, and it was the biggest relief ever.

I also got banned from all sorts for really stupid uniform rules. I see why they exist, but, like the OP was saying, I couldn't bear to wear a tie on a bad day - it would cause so much anxiety that I was having panic attacks. I still wasn't allowed to do loads because I wasn't wearing a tie, or because I was wearing shoes that supported my ankles properly. It was just more piling on to the problems I had anyway.

I am aware that I am filling in a lot of gaps here, but I found that my grades shot up (I was failing - at the start of school I had been predicted straight As and had been given extention work and been in top sets all through school, but the effects of that damaging environment were too much and I am still affected now) as soon as I was allowed to start working to my own pace and not being distracted by all those rules that I would never be able to meet. It wasn't a case of choice- I physically couldn't keep that up.

And I thought the OPs DD is in Y10? If we include sixth form (presuming she is staying on) that is three more years - surely it is worth at least trying the alternative?

exoticfruits · 19/03/2011 10:19

Year 11- so she has a matter of weeks to go-totally stupid to make a stand IMO.

exoticfruits · 19/03/2011 10:20

Sorry year 10 . Even so.....

butterpieify · 19/03/2011 10:21

Why would the OP be talking about paying for an entire GCSE course then? Surely it has all been done by now anyway, with just revision and exams left? In which case, even if they decided to pay, it is only the exam that needs paying for.

butterpieify · 19/03/2011 10:23

Says Y10 on the first page of the thread.

Original poster

rarebite · 19/03/2011 14:24

How nice to hear from you butterpieify - makes all the difference. I think this issue is general for all parents so didn't emphasise dyspraxia. But I think it is the case that DD is not able to limbo low enough to meet the rules.

She has been diagnosed as having an IQ in top 1% but her potential is always being messed up by stress and anxiety. Despite being ill from school for one third of last year she still got in to top set sciences and maths. So she is clever.

But there is another year and 4 months to go (plus 6th form). She needs to be able to relax to perform and I hear all you say - so sorry you don't feel you met your potential. I hope now you are free of school you can.

OP posts:

Margles · 22/03/2011 00:01

Does dispraxia count as a disability? If so, would causing her to stress about her uniform be seen as discrimination? Shouldn't the school be making reasonable adjustments?

exoticfruits · 22/03/2011 08:37

How does dyspraxia allow her to go in trousers that are not uniform trousers?!
I would have thought that if your DC was dyspraxic you would help by making sure that you bought correct uniform and had it clean and ready for her to put on.

gingeroots · 22/03/2011 09:01

exoticfruits - not sure if you've read whole thread - but OP has explained that the school does not specify a make of school trousers ,or detail as to what is and is not acceptable .
They are not school uniform trousers in the sense that you have to buy a specific pair .
OPDD's trousers ( the pair that were objected to on exam day ) had never been commented on before by the school .
OP has also already explained that DD had got all her school stuff ready the night before ,laid out her school clothes .
She's not specified whether it was clean or not - but I think it's safe to assume that it was .

Original poster

rarebite · 22/03/2011 11:48

Thanks gingeroots. I was worrying about the exam - revision, equipment, right place, right time. I double-checked the exam instructions to make sure there was nothing to cause DD anxiety.

The exam was in a different builing on a different site to previous exams. My focus was to ensure this was in her memory so she would not go to the wrong place and panic. I didn't give the uniform much thought.

So DD failed a unexpected hurdle - does that justifying kicking the eggs we had invested (revision time, not being allowed to go out until exam papers were practiced) out the basket.

OP posts:

Annelongditton · 23/03/2011 10:29

I have read this thread out of interest and am very confused. How comes DD was wearing non-uniform narrow trousers if she has an intolerance of tight clothes?
Stories like this appear in the Daily Mail regularly and my worry is that parents who rush to defend their DCs for breaking what they percieve to be petty rules are doing their children no favours. School is about learning life skills as well as academic learning.
When DD goes out to work, which could be in 1 year and 4 months time she will have to conform to the rules and regulations that her employers stipulate. I wouldn't reccomend any of the armed forces as a career, or the police, fire brigade, nursing, beautician,most retail jobs,hotel work, I could go on endlessly because even my hairdressers has a dress code (black).
If this was my child I would be angry with them for not wearing correct school uniform, however, the matter wouldn't have arisen as I wouldn't have bought the wrong ones in the first place!
Having said all that I do think a Saturday detention would have been a more fitting punishment.

gingeroots · 23/03/2011 16:13

People don't seem to understand that some schools have more of a dress code than a school uniform .
So instead of requiring parents to buy a particular type/brand of trousers
they say black trousers .
Early on in the thread the OP said
The school doesn't have a preferred style supplied by a preferred supplier - and she has worn the trousers before without them being questioned

OP'sDD wore them on the day of the exam and they were deemed too narrow .

Annelongditton · 23/03/2011 19:47

Who are you kidding?
Do you really not know the difference between school trousers and fashion trousers?
Do you really think this kind of attitude helps your children long term?
Both my DCs are in very popular Independent schools and they really wouldn't stand for any of this kind of nonsense.

elphabadefiesgravity · 23/03/2011 20:05

Anne - no many people don;t becasue many schools don;t object to fashion trousers. I saee kids going to school every day wearing them.

If the OP's school has not objected in the past they should not choose exam day to start for the first time.

Uniform requiremtns in state schools are often very differnt to independents (mine are at an independent and the guidelines are clearly laid down but state schools especially those located in areas that are less affluent often don;t do this as they don;t want to stipulate one expensive option.

I am all in favour of strict uniforms but you have to be clear what you expect. The OP's school obviusly wasn't.

I find your attitude quite snobbish.

exoticfruits · 23/03/2011 20:39

I would bet there had been issues beforehand.I can't believe that the school would make an issue of it, out of the blue, on an exam day with no warnings.

gingeroots · 24/03/2011 06:45

I can't believe that the school would make an issue of it, out of the blue, on an exam day with no warnings
I have a feeling that view is shared by OP ,hence this thread .

exoticfruits · 24/03/2011 07:27

If it is the case then she is right to be aggrieved, but I think that her DD must have had a long running issue over uniform and that they must have been given a dress code for the exam.

If the exam was the very first time ever that uniform had been mentioned then the school were being very unreasonable.

If she had been picked up on uniform in the past they were still being a bit unfair to act the way they did, but it is understandable.

Mine have always been given a strict dress code for exams so if they choose not to stick to it they take the consequences.

prh47bridge · 24/03/2011 10:41

You clearly haven't met some of the teachers I've come across.

I would agree that the school should not make an issue of it out of the blue on an exam day with no warnings. However I have known it happen, usually where an individual teacher decided to go on a crusade.

Without giving away too much, I know of an incident where a teacher attempted to stop some children going into an exam on the grounds that their uniform was incorrect even though it was entirely compliant with the school's uniform regulations and the alleged non-compliance had not been commented on previously. In this case the head teacher happened to come past at the right time and stopped the teacher concerned before too much damage was done, although I am sure it still unsettled the children involved. The school was in the process of changing its uniform regulations. It appears the teacher involved was attempting to enforce the new uniform regulations even though they were not due to be introduced until the following autumn. As it happened, the teacher involved left the school unexpectedly that summer.

So I see no reason for your assumption that the OP's DD had a long running issue over uniform. The OP has told us that the school's uniform regulations do not specify a particular style or make of trousers and that these trousers have never previously been questioned by the school. The OP has told us that her daughter was forced to wear a school jumper that was too small for her over her school T-shirt. The OP's school may be an exception but I don't know of any school that insists on a jumper being worn at all times. In all my local schools a school T-shirt on its own is perfectly acceptable. After all, when a child is too hot he/she should be allowed to remove the jumper. The OP has told us that the school is introducing a new uniform in September and the teacher involved in this incident was involved in determining the policy. The OP has told us that other pupils were made to wear clothes that were too small. This has all the hallmarks of an individual teacher going on a personal crusade.

JoanofArgos · 24/03/2011 10:49

Actually PRH lots of schools do insist on jumpers on at all times: when it gets really hot in June, children have to ask the teacher of the lesson they are in if they may remove their jumpers. I know of two (state) schools where this is the case.

I see the reasoning, I suppose - that otherwise some kids will never own/wear the jumper, and will have shirt tails out, not look the same in photos etc.

But I think it's a bit daft - at 15 you should have to ask if you can take your jumper off when it's 30 degrees outside. If your 3 year old asked that, you'd say for goodness' sake have a bit of common sense and just take it off if you're hot!

JoanofArgos · 24/03/2011 10:52

'at 15 you shouldn't have to, I mean!

prh47bridge · 24/03/2011 10:54

However, I have to say that there is always someone who tries to say it must be the fault of the pupil or the parent, even in extreme cases where there can be no possible justification for the school's actions. Unfortunately I have personal experience of this.

prh47bridge · 24/03/2011 10:57

Thanks for the correction JoanofArgos. I haven't come across that myself but happy to accept that it happens. And the OP hasn't told us whether her daughter's school says that jumpers are supposed to be worn at all times.

Still feels like an individual teacher deciding to go on a crusade to me.

elphabadefiesgravity · 24/03/2011 13:42

I have known the jumper rule too and I think it is blinking ridiculous.

At the dc's private school they have a school jumper but it is worn when the child feels cold. They still look smart without. And horror of horror they have abolished ties for senior girls.

JoanofArgos · 24/03/2011 13:44

Yes, I agree about the crusade bit!
I just said that about the jumpers because I couldn't believe it at first - that they had to ask to remove them - but then found they would actually be in trouble if they didn't. I think it's daft.

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