Shy child - huge secondary-any advice?

[dippymare]

Have very young (August born.) v. under confident dd on cusp of secondary school. Anyone any experience of sending similar to a huge secondary? Good school but massive - am I mad to consider it?

Not if it's a good school IMO.

One of the schools I'm considering for my shy DD is huge, but each year group is like a school on its own, so the children don't feel too lost in the crowd.

If you're happy with the school generally I wouldn't worry too much. I say I wouldn't worry - but that's a complete lie I'm a mess of worry at the moment but I think most of it is unfounded.

Whether she will be going up with some of her classmates from primary school might be more important than the actual size of the secondary school.

My DCs are a t a huge secondary, but its all very well managed. Year 7s are mainly kept together as a years (special lunchtimes, playground and form rooms all in one building). They have both said it is much easier to make friends because there are so many people, someone is bound to have the same interests as you.

I would visit the school and ask the questions you have then judge it by how it answers. I have known parents send their kids to the smaller local secondaries, and actually they have more confusing layouts, and are easier to get "lost" in.

I think often huge schools can be better for unusual children. Because the pool of peers is greater, they are more likely to find people very similar to them, or mates they can really connect with.

ds2 goes to a big secondary (210 in each year), but in yr7 they are taught exclusively in their form group, so settling in is not really particularly daunting.

As a new parent you can afford to be 'fussy' as school are sympathetic to new parents; and keen to tell you about their pastoral systems. Ask about form tutor and how they help pupils to settle in. (BTW You're not being fussy at all.) Mine was shy at a big school, but found great friends eventually. Agree that a big school means plenty of like-minded people, just may take longer to find them!

What does she think about going? Maybe excited as well as nervous. A good school will have lots to offer her.

My shy DD (yr 7 now) went from a primary school of 90 children to a secondary school of 1600 children last month. I was seriously stressed and I have to say it has been wonderful. She has fitted in, made friends, greats the Head like a long lost member of the family and is altogether a new lovely child. You may be pleasantly surprised. She has completely exceded my expectations.

Forgot to say - July born

Yes, it's not the size of the school that matters, it's the organisation. FAR more important.

Big schools have all the advantages as detailed by others above plus the sort of critical mass that buys more facilities, greater GCSE choice, more clubs and sports.

You'll be amazed how much more 'ready' your DC will be once the primary has worked its Y6 magic on her. My DS wasn't Mr Popular at primary (started there beginning of Y6) and of course has found starting secondary a bit daunting (280 child intake into Y7!)as he's not very good at making friends but he's coping really well and likes the more grown-up atmosphere. He hasn't made a 'best friend' yet but he seems perfectly happy, as will your DD.