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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

New Y7 school choice

7 replies

tenacious · 08/09/2010 23:27

My middle son has just started Y7 at comprehensive. He and his older brother went down the route of taking the grammar school exams, but after looking round the schools, each one of them decided it was not for them. They wanted to sit the exam, but did not want to go. As a result, we put the grammar schools further down the priority list on the application form, and the comprehensive further up. As it turned out, they both gained places at the grammar schools, but were offered places at the comprehensive because it was further up the list, obviously. Some people I speak to think I am absolutely nuts as I did not insist on them going to grammar school even if it was against what they wanted. However, others think I am right to have given them the choice and put their feelings above those of my own. I chose to put them first, not me. I am sure they will do well. They are both bright boys and have a lot of respect from their teachers, tutors and friends. They have a lot of serious hobbies outside of school, and have achieved highly in music exams and in sport independently. Am I right or wrong in this decision?

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admission · 08/09/2010 23:41

To me it is far better to be at the top of the tree at the comprehensive than be near the bottom of the tree in a grammar.

As long as they are willing to put the work in they will succeed.

I think you were right, but I am sure others will disagree.

DancingHippoOnAcid · 08/09/2010 23:57

You have definitely done the right thing.

I have decided not to go for the local grammar for my very bright DD as it has a very definite emphasis on maths/science and she loves the arts/ drama/ music which are really neglected there.

Am instead looking very seriously at local comp - still has very good rep, and great for drama etc.

You know your DCs and well done for choosing what will suit THEM and not caring about what others think you SHOULD have done.

mummytime · 09/09/2010 08:09

DCs should be involved in choosing secondary schools. Mine both choose the school I wanted in the end, it was close with DD, but actually she'd have ended up there if she'd choosen her other choice; it would have been second and she wouldn't have got into the other school.

snorkie · 09/09/2010 09:51

I think assuming it's not a complete sink school that you have done the right thing. Children who feel in control are likely to achieve better.

They sound like lovely boys who know their own minds to me. And hats off to them for sitting the exam anyway - good esteem booster for them and it alerts their new school to their potential as well.

yearsevenmum · 09/09/2010 13:53

We also turned down a grammar school and got lots of "advice", "opinion" and "comment" that we were "absolutely mad" to do so.
It wasn't so much my ds's choice as ours as parents. He was keen to go to the grammar as some of his best friends were doing so but we looked very carefully at the schools to see what would suit him best, where he would be happiest etc.
After a week at school he is absolutely loving it and we have no regrets at all.

Of course, we are very lucky in that we had the option of a good non-grammar school which we recognise not everyone has.

Kez100 · 09/09/2010 16:30

The able children at our comprehensive secondary do very well. 10 children this year (10% of the year) gained 88 a* and handful of A's as well between them. Plus they all the other activites available that go with an Arts School and were living on the doorstep of their home (instead of a hour trip each way).

If you children are happy, they will be more willing to work.

tenacious · 09/09/2010 22:47

Thank you all so much for your comments. I feel so much more reassured and happy with the decision as a result of getting your feedback.

Many of your thoughts are what I've always thought too, but have had niggling doubts because of adverse comments, and perhaps my own strict "you will do as I say" upbringing.

School is fairly close, in a lovely location with good results and my boys are happy being there. The grammars are an hour on the bus with a population that I do not think is a true reflection of the real world.

My niggling doubts are gone now. I think the best thing is to push on, give my sons lots of encouragement and support, and I really hope they turn out to be well rounded, happy guys with a good education.

Same will go for my Y3 daughter when it's her turn.

Thanks to you all for your help as I am brand new on here.

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