Children joining in parents night

[Mozartine]

Just had an online booking form for my child’s parents night and again the school suggests the child is present. We have a number of questions we would like to ask that we couldn’t ask with our child present and a lot of other parents must be in a similar position. What benefit would there be to the child being there? In primary o wanted to ask whether they were at all to blame for the beatings they seemed to attract, why they were given the main part in the school show when they didn’t want it. In secondary I would like to know what grades they are likely to get in higher so I can guide their uni aspirations accordingly. All important things, but inappropriate to ask in front of a child.

The only benefit I can see is that annoyed parents would be less inclined to raise things that annoy them in front of their child. Is that it?

Intruiged. There. Are lots of teachers on this. Anyone with an answer?

As corporal punishment has been banned in Scottish schools for a very long time, I'm assuming you mean your child is being bullied by others? It would be inappropriate to bring that up at a parent's night meeting which is primarily to focus on your child's achievements and next steps. If your child is being bullied, I urge you to contact the school for a meeting specific to that. In secondary school S1-S3 similarly your child's achievements within a broad education and next steps will be discussed. If senior school, the teacher cannot with certainty say what grade your child will achieve. They can give a good estimate if your child is working hard and passing internal assessments. It would be in your child's interest to attend that meeting with you, particularly if there are areas they could improve upon but aren't focusing as much as they should. However, tracking is done monthly in most subjects and if they are on track they are obviously coping with the demands of the course. I would be surprised if parents weren't aware of reporting criteria as schools are usually strong on communicating that to parents. If you don't understand it, I would ask for someone to explain it to you. It's possible that the message isn't clear and schools will normally be grateful if that is pointed out.

S4 is normally when you get the predicted grades.

i can agree it seems a bit wishy washy before that - I have 2 and for one performing as expected meant he was getting 90% in assessments and tests and for the other he was getting 50 - 60%

I think at secondary school, they have so many different kids to teach, it helps for them to be there so they know who they're talking about! You'll never convince me that's not the reason.

What age are we talking about?

the tracking reports in the Scottish high school my Dd goes to have had what level they are working at and where they are within that level 4 different stages since S1
She is now in S4 and tracking reports predict for national 5 either a strong pass (A/B) a pass or needs work to pass, parents evening always encourages the child to attend, we had ours last week and they gave exact marks on test and say whether on track for whatever grade and whether they should contemplate doing a higher in that subject
parents evenings are subject based and not really for issues not relating to that, an apointment to see their guidance teacher would be more appropiate for concersn re bullying or getting into fights etc

I treat parents evening as a three way conversation. Me to support the teachers message and vice versa.

I would not have waited to parents evening to raise anything that couldn't be discussed in front of my child.

At our school the children join from year9 which is 13/14.

Quite right. They need to engage with their own future at that point. And head any difficult discussions.

I’m really surprised at this. I have one child in first year Uni and we had a report once a year, a parents night once a year and were never at any stage given an indication as to what grade they’d get, unless it was cloaked in language I didn’t understand but was supposed to. We lucked out - she got 7 As and a B at Nat 5 and 4 As and a B at higher, but at all times it was a (pleasant) surprise.

We emailed school a handful of times when they were struggling with feeling under pressure and of the 5 times or so we got one response. That was only after we had re-emailed and asked for the guidance teacher to be cc’d too. That’s why parents night is a key time to ask anything we have to ask - trying to contact the school at any other time is nigh on impossible! I don’t have time to physically go to school reception (I work shifts that aren’t flexible for that). I have no option but to send emails they seem to just disappear into the ether.