November baby deferred.

[Jess5579]

Just wondering if anyone is deferring their November baby?

Another infant teacher here. I can see the dilemma if this is popular around you and your child will be very young. If the age group generally has not deferred I would not unless I had concerns re ASN.

Please consider why and how your child will be 'more' school ready after another year of nursery with younger children. Very critically evaluate the provision available in nursery- is group time only 'encouraged' if the children freeflow all day? If they do not want to draw/craft/ play turn taking games do they have to? Can they leave story time if bored? Unfortunately the nursery provision I've recently visited is not high quality enough to defer a neurotypical child.

I didn't defer my January DD. She was more than ready for school & has thrived - although one of the youngest in the year group it's never held her back. I didn't think about the other end though when she will be younger than all her friends at 17/18. But socially & academically she's done really well & even in nursery she always preferred playing with older kids, she's always been quite a mature child. If I had any inkling she would have struggled I would have deferred. Maybe worth asking the nursery their thoughts?

Both my sons have November birthdays and I deferred both (no SEN). We’ve personally never come across any downsides to deferring and as teens it's definitely shown the positives of being that bit older.

It all about high school imo and those milestones.

I wouldn't defer November babies. They will be far too old for their year if you do.

Except they won’t if the majority of other autumn/winter borns are also deferring.

There's a big difference between autumn/winter though. I would defer mid January/February babies but i wouldn't defer September-November babies. December to mid January babies I'd dither with!

Op how do you feel about them being 16 and able to leave school half way through 4th year before sitting any exams?

It wouldn't be my choice. I think it's crazy that the government are encouraging kids to start later but haven't upped the school leaving age to go with it.

Just because they are able to do doesnt mean you would let them leave school early. I have children with October and November birthdays and neither deferred as it was only really done if they had January/February birthdays. Both stayed on until 6th year and started Uni at age 17.

I myself have a November birthday and left school after 5th year at age 16 and went to Uni. Had graduated by the age of 20.

Just found this board.

I didn't defer my November daughter as that wasn't an option years back but I have wondered a few times if it would have been something I'd consider nowadays. She was more than ready to move from nursery (she is on the spectrum and really struggled with the chaos of nursery - sitting in nice quiet rooms learning really suits her!) but she's just started high school at 11 and is struggling a bit. She's smaller than lots of the other kids and a bit young emotionally and I wonder if this would actually have been the time where it would have all made more sense.

But she was super happy in primary school so maybe I would have just created a different problem - so I try not to think about it too much!

@dementedpixie It maybe doesn't mean they would, but if they aren't doing that great then it helps the schools stats not to encourage them to stay on.

My friend has the issue of school encouraging her DD to consider other options after 4th year.

I deferred my January born, it was the best thing I did for him.
I'm not sure if I would a November born though, they will be a lot older than others in their class.
Jan/feb deferments are common, sept-December less so.

Trust your instinct, you know your own child better than anyone.

I have 2 February children and deferred one and not the other. No regrets with either, decision was entirely based on each child and their development and personality at the time.
Good luck, I know it's not easy as you second guess your decision. FWIW, I am november born and not deferred (wasn't really a thing in my day) and can't say it was ever a problem for me.