Bit of a niche question about deferral/moving from state to private

[washrinse]

DS was 4 in December. We had always planned to defer him as we did our older two DC and he is currently down to stay another year at his private nursery. However, DH and I are both starting to feel a bit unhappy with the nursery and aren't really sure we want him there for another year.

He feels very ready for P1 both academically, emotionally and socially but I don't like the idea of him being the youngest in the year later on (I was the youngest in my year and it was absolutely fine at primary but not great at secondary). He has good friends in P1 at the school and as it's a P1/2 they would be with him if he started in the summer. DC are in the state sector but we plan to go private for secondary where the schools I know of do understandably like kids to defer. So I guess my question is - does anyone know if he could he repeat a year when moving into the private sector? Would that be crazy? It wouldn't necessarily be repeating P7 as we might move him earlier to make life less complex but that depends a bit on my career over the next few years.

Alternative is finding a different nursery for next year, but haven't come across one that we really like that also works time wise with school pick up/drop off.

I have a child with a December birthday who was state educated for primary and private for secondary. He wasn't made to defer. He is doing fine in his year.

But I'm sure your DS could repeat a year, particularly if he was no longer with a cohort of friends. I know kids who have done this (in Scotland and Englad).

He could very likely repeat the year when he moves to the private sector as they're used to lots of coming and going, children from overseas being older etc. I don't know about state sector without a very obvious academic/social reason.

At my DDs private school all the children who started there in P1 with birthdays after November were deferred.
Children with December birthdays who hadn't been deferred did join the school and seem to be fine but are a full year younger than some others in the year.

I'm not aware of anyone with Jan/Feb birthdays who have not been deferred and one of DD1s friends (Feb birthday) was put into P7 on joining the school when she was applying for S1.

Private sector generally prefer them to have the advantage of being older for the year for the S4-6 years and starting university.

Thank you, this is really good to know. Especially the bit about an S1 application being put into P7 - as this might be what we would ultimately be asking for.

I have deferred children so I’m all for that.

However I do wonder how your son would feel about deferring a year at that age. Being differed all through is one thing, but repeating a year when the peer group you have moved up with progress on might not feel very nice for him.

Just my thoughts.

Thing about deferral is it very dependent on individual schools /admission authorities agreeing to deferral at the time. So leaving it until he’s P7 is a bit of a risk because who knows what the schools approach will be by then.

However I do wonder how your son would feel about deferring a year at that age. Being differed all through is one thing, but repeating a year when the peer group you have moved up with progress on might not feel very nice for him.

Yes, this is on my mind.

I know two people who have moved school and gone back a year. I think they’re both ok. One repeated P7 (state to private) the other moved mid S2 I think (private to private). So some schools are fine with it.
My own DD doesn’t seem to have mentioned it as a massive issue (it’s her friends).
I think you’re fine to keep it in mind as an option.

If it were me I think I'd just do the deferral now and do another nursery year. DD is a Feb birthday and although she was very ready to start P1 in 2021 when she was 4, I deferred her because a) I didn't want her to be the youngest b) her pre-school was interrupted due to Covid and c) we are planning private secondary.

She did get a little bored at nursery but I switched her to term time as I have an older DS too at school and chucked her into random holiday clubs that year which spiced things up for her a bit.

I know a few people who went down a year when moving to private. They mostly went from end of P7 to beginning of P7. It seems quite common especially with students coming from different systems overseas. The private schools are happy as they get an extra year of fees as well as an extra year to bring them on before exams. And the private schools were different enough and had specialist subject teaching so it didn’t feel like a repeated year.

Thanks everyone - really good to know that it is a viable option, albeit one that needs a lot more thought. And we haven’t applied for school this year so not even sure we can do that…

If it were me I think I'd just do the deferral now and do another nursery year. This would definitely be my first choice if I still felt really happy with the nursery :(

Could he not join the school nursery at DCs' state primary?

@ostentatiousocelot There isn’t one unfortunately.

Oh that's annoying. Are there any council run early years centres nearby? They can be really good. I agree with PPs that if you're dead set on deferring I'd try to do it now, not in P7 - even if that means another year at the private nursery.

P1 is really play based now and not at all "academic" as it used to be so if you don't defer he will likely be fine.

Some private schools have the p7 year at the senior school so could he possibly do 7 years at state and then re-do p7 at a private school but at their senior school campus? It might feel less like a repeat of a year.

You don't have to be in catchment to apply for a place at a council/school nursery, ime they have been more educational and less childcare (having used four nurseries, two of each type)

Thanks for everybody’s thoughts. There is a possible council alternative - not sure we would get a place but I’m going to look into it. Having discussed with DH at length over the weekend we do want to go with our instincts and defer P1.