Advice on moving to Edinburgh

[NeverMindThatPie]

We currently live in a 3 bedroom semi in a semi rural village very close to the primary school which I have rented for 8.5 years in Midlothian. I have been single for 6 years, and have two sons, 8&12. 8 yo is on CAHMS waiting list for ASD assessment although the professionals involved, GP and school work as though his diagnosis is given. I primarily WFH to be there for youngest as he cannot attend wrap around care.

My LL has mentioned selling several times in the last year or so but hasn't given a concrete answer as to when.My grandmother has a 3 bedroom flat in southside of Edinburgh, opposite Green space with lots of trees, very close to our favourite swimming pool, with great school catchment, she has offered to give it to me, I'll pay some rent but no where near Market rate. Initially, I preferred the option of flat being sold and me being gifted money for a deposit, but I don't earn enough for a decent mortgage right now, although im hopeful that i will in a few years.

Due to several reasons I have taken months to decide what to do as I am so scared of upsetting the kids and I have never felt so single.I am taking the flat, it offers security and is a great place to live.I spoke to the primary school, and we agreed given that there are structures in place to support my 8yo, that he should stay in his current school, at least until next year. My eldest i know will also want to stay in his current high school. I will commute to and from, which will be around an 1.15 hour round trip. Its not ideal, and we will visit the new catchment school to prepare my youngest to move for p5.

They both like living in the countryside, I know they will be upset and won't see what a great opportunity this is.

I just wondered if anyone had any advice on selling moving to their children?If anyone had experience of commuting for school run and juggling working?Just any insight or advice would be hugely appreciated!

Congratulations on making your decision. Unless the catchment High is really poor or his existing school is an easy commute for him to do by himself, I'd move your eldest as soon as you move. He'll probably settle really quick and potentially 5 years of travelling will be a nightmare - worst case scenario is that you can put in a placing request for him to move back if after giving it a real try he is very unhappy.

Plan for the younger seems sensible but again, I'd work on pushing new school to prepare for him to move asap.

Kids are very adaptable and you will still have great access to the outdoors in south Edinburgh.

The main thing about the commute for school and working is that it will take you longer to get to school in the case of illnesses, forgotten items etc. It's perfectly possible and loads of people do it but it's obviously much more convenient for them to be nearby.

Both my DSs went to out of catchment High school with no reasonable public transport and I worked in the office so it was a case of dropping them at school very early and picking up after work. I had to reduce hours to do this. It was great when they were able to drive themselves but prior to that it was years and years of drop off and pick up and that's with a smaller commute than you are thinking. They didn't know anyone when they started high school and both made friends.

It might be worth finding out what sorts of things the new schools would have their existing doesn't. Maybe better clubs after, better football team? Easier access to the pool, single bus ride to the beach potentially? Anything in the area that they might want to try - scouts/sports club etc.

They can get to choose decorations for their new bedrooms? Big difference to owning from renting in terms of what you can do to the property.

You are giving them increased stability and security and that is a big thing.

Thank you so much @BigBoysDontCry that is such a helpful considerate reply.

I have phoned Gillespies HS and they have a waiting list for catchment pupils, so eldest will have to wait at current school anyway, and i cant put him on list until I have proof of address. There is no direct bus, so he will have to get 2 buses and walk, and of course I'm worried he'll miss the bus etc. So I can now see me doing the commute for longer than I had hoped.

I hope I've done the right thing.

I will put in a flexible working request and ask for staggered times to allow me to collect and drop off boys.

Also thinking about the higher potential for snow in Midlothian- depending on where you are - as there is an increased chance of disruption to public transport and driving conditions when you get past the by-pass. I lived in Penicuik many years ago and would battle to get into Edinburgh for work to find it completely snow free :)

Flexible working would definitely be a good idea just to save you stressing if the roads are busy.

We moved mid school year in primary school, DC not especially happy but it worked out fine. I've got a rough idea of where you're talking about moving to - great amenities, opportunities for social life when DC older, plenty of green space (and beaches) not that far away.

Get the 12 year old into JS's as soon as you can. He's at an age where they start getting their independence, going into town etc. - much harder to do if all his mates are in Midlothian.

This piece about commuter towns near Edinburgh might be a good place to start - it gives an idea of commute times and prices and ESPC is probably the best place to look for properties once you decide where to focus on (apologies for the long URL though) https://espc.com/news/post/where-are-the-best-places-for-commuters-to-edinburgh-to-live?utmsource=facebook&utmmmedium=social-paid&utmcampaign=area-focus&utmmcontent=commuters-to-edinburgh&fbclid=IwAR07gSueOKHilBHi3LYG4Ux3UXcWRDJ9E5aYFxQ5GelnZRm1GUqkQqOFaDUaemmAQewg-g5e4HWkDsZ2iB2EbcKgJM19GzT5N5GpwYqsWcEmk2nrId2Ho1EyZcgfpW3glahMIudMXvECoTTS7QI7DfX6BSduk-8OgXoBh38LBfzOjrvkzcsQAEnHHJvO6oo_k

When I moved with primary age DC, I explained that we HAD to move (landlord wanting to sell) but focussed on the benefits of the new place. I suggested every Friday we would go swimming and have ice cream after, trying out ice cream shops in the new city to find our new favourite. And that they could still have play dates / hang out with their old friends at weekends.
Emphasise two lots of friends (old school plus new school) rather than losing friends. Allowing them to choose paint colours for their new bedrooms, and space for old friends to visit and sleep over. Most 12 year olds from Midlothian will be glad of an excuse to visit the big city!
It sounds like an amazing opportunity to build security for your family, and sure it will be the right decision in the long run.