English person moving to the Highlands

[CindyTrevaskis]

So DH and I are planning to move to the Highlands in a few years. We want to open a B&B somewhere in the countryside.

We have been told that we will not be welcomed by locals from others. I have said I find this ridiculous and that this idea of ‘get out of my village’ is an outdated and judgemental view. I’ve never found an issue whenever I’ve stayed up there for holidays, everyone is always lovely.

Please tell me I’m right and that it won’t be a problem? I’ve loved Scotland since I was a little girl and this is my absolute dream.

Depressingly my eldest daughter has found she gets a lot more stick for her English accent in secondary school than she did in primary school. And we live in a very nice area with lots is nationalities. I don't think it amounts to bullying but makes her feel very awkward at times. Lots of people don't believe she has lived here for 10 years!

@Grumpycatsmum yep, my boy too and he’s half Scottish and has never lived anywhere else.

Sorry but if an electrician/plumber doesn't bother turning up, while I may not 'get all shouty and demanding' I will certainly let them know I'm not impressed. Whatever the culture is, that's just shite.

@IntermittentParps you can call it shite if you want, and maybe it is, but it's how things are here. Local people expect it, and it's part of a really laid back approach to life which is definitely not shite at all - it's lovely! Not rushing about like a blue-arsed fly! Who wants to do that? Just chill out and accept that non-emergency jobs are going to take ages.

Yeah, I knew you or someone would respond along those lines. It's quite patronising.
Many things about a laid-back approach to life are lovely, but not that.

I'm not recognising Scotland here at all and I've lived here 20 years with an English accent!

@CindyTrevaskis im in a very small village (well outside) up at the very top of Scotland . I married in. The village I'm in is very much little England and 80 % of accents in the village are English. Some of the worst sentiments probably come from my in-laws and extended family 'bloody English, you don't count you married in'. Anti English feeling seemed much higher in lockdown and was questioned a few times in tesco as to why I'd travelled and how long I'd be staying.
Anywhere on the North Coast is becoming very saturated with B and Bs thanks to the NC500. The only thing with it is the seasons are short and the winters are hard. Worth visiting a few times in the off season to see if it's something you can cope with. The other bit is access to health care and if you need access to schools. Nearest hospital for consultants/ICU is nearly 3 hours for me and more specialist clinics are 6 hours

My DM is English has lived in Scotland for almost fifty years.
She will tell you that Scotland is welcoming, that she is regarded as Scottish by everyone.
This is and always has been untrue, she just doesn't hear what is said behind her back.
But she is happy living there believing she is Scottish and welcomed.

We considered moving back to Scotland but I was concerned about the abuse my English dc would get in school even in a larger city like Glasgow.
Ironically I would be much less concerned with almost any other accent.

@IntermittentParps

Sorry but if an electrician/plumber doesn't bother turning up, while I may not 'get all shouty and demanding' I will certainly let them know I'm not impressed. Whatever the culture is, that's just shite.

Depends though...

It took me 3 weeks to get hold of my mechanic not long ago because it wasn’t urgent, ended up bumping into him at his mum’s and got it sorted then.

We’ve had a problem with our roof, the roofer plays football with my DP, so while he came out straight away to stop water coming in, it then took him about 6 weeks to come back.

I don’t even live in the highlands anymore, it’s just a small town... and it works differently when you know people. In a small town in the highlands, you know everyone so the electrician isn’t just the electrician, you went to school with him or you’re friends with his sister, or you’re related to him...and you’ll know the other customers too.. so things just work a bit differently and they’ll prioritise jobs by what needs doing first rather than who called first.

My friends here are all Scottish, I doubt v much they talk about me being English behind my back.
Dd is born and brought up here and fits in as Scottish but has a slight English twang, as does her BF, neither have had issues and they now live in a rough part of Glasgow!

FeistySheep, it sounds bigoted to me. Excluding people cause they might not get your sense of humour cause they are not from these parts. I hope you read that back and are embarrassed. I would hope that there are lots of people in Scotland living in small villages in the highlands that are not so small minded.

I was wondering about this as we’re also planning a move. I was born in Scotland and have close family there but grew up outside so have no accent. I’m worried about the Indy ref and nationalism and what that may mean for English people in Scotland. Certainly I’ve never experienced anything (and we go often) but there is def a bit of ‘if you’re not 7th generation to live in the village then you’re not a true local’ kind of thing going on.

The areas you listed are not the highlands. The highlands are really Inverness and surrounding and all the way north.

Any problem you have will be based on your business more than anything. For example having luxury accommodation will compete with local hotels which provide a lot of employment in these more rural places. Make sure you do plenty research.

@Iwouldratherbesailing I didn't say I thought like that, or would behave like that! I was trying to explain how it might feel to a generic local person, whether or not their actions and behaviour are correct. If you want to move into an area, it is wise to be aware of what people are feeling, even if their feelings are wrong.
I would not personally exclude anyone from a friendship group. I might not go to a huge effort to befriend someone, if I was happy with my current friends. It hard work making friends! But I would be welcoming generally. I have both local friends and 'incomer' friends. I love them all, but can relax more with the people who have always been here. Whether that's right or wrong is not really relevant - it's how I feel. I will always be nice to everyone, and therefore don't believe I'm doing anything wrong. But I don't owe anybody a deep friendship - I will be friends with people I get on with, as I'm sure most people will.
I genuinely like individual 'incomers' and many of them bring lots of good things to the community. But you have to acknowledge that if large quantities of people of culture X move into the home of culture Y, culture X will change. Whether you think that's good or bad is a matter of opinion, but I wouldn't judge people of culture Y for disliking it, even if they actually like the individual people from culture X.

FeistySheep, it sounds bigoted to me. Excluding people cause they might not get your sense of humour cause they are not from these parts. I hope you read that back and are embarrassed. I would hope that there are lots of people in Scotland living in small villages in the highlands that are not so small minded.

What's bigoted about choosing to be friends and spend more time with people who share your view on life and your sense of humour? Surely that's just natural, you gravitate towards people you click with, regardless of where they are from, however sense of humour and attitude/approach to life may be impacted by where you grew up and so there's a correlation there. It doesn't make it bigoted unless you disregard people purely because of where they come from, but that's different to what Feistysheep said.

My experience of living in Scotland has been mixed. Born in Scotland, I speak with an English accent because my parents, one English and one Scots, relocated to England for work. I went to school and university there. I relocated back to Scotland several years ago and never gave it any thought because I was such a frequent visitor and have a large family here and never encountered anti-English rhetoric before. I live in coastal town in the east. I haven't encountered any anti-English rhetoric where I live except 'banter' related to international football matches (which I have absolutely no interest in) and around the referendum. However, I have experienced it at work where I am employed by a public sector body in a specialist role. I expect it to raise its head again when there is another referendum. Some of it is veiled, dressed up as banter but sometimes it is downright nasty. It is a minority but it is there. So be prepared. My neighbours are lovely as are people in our local shops and the environment is second to none so I am happy here and will stay.

It has made me reflect on how many in the UK treat foreigners both historically and in present times, so it is not limited to Scotland.

Thank you @Honeycombskl ! That is exactly what I was trying to say

Sadly you may find it to be true. You are welcomed when you are on holiday as you are seen as a cash cow. Living there, you are seen as taking a home and a job from a local and forcing a local out.

@Mincepiesallyearround

I was wondering about this as we’re also planning a move. I was born in Scotland and have close family there but grew up outside so have no accent. I’m worried about the Indy ref and nationalism and what that may mean for English people in Scotland. Certainly I’ve never experienced anything (and we go often) but there is def a bit of ‘if you’re not 7th generation to live in the village then you’re not a true local’ kind of thing going on.

No accent? You must have an accent.

I mean no Scottish accent, I have an English one.

I still have my English accent, but my English friends tell me I sound Scottish.
The Indyref was awful, and I don't welcome the next one, but I refuse to talk politics with anyone.
I was asked once during the first one and I said, "I've lived in Scotland for many years, raised my daughter here and don't want to leave"
It told him nothing, but he seemed happy.

Feisty, I get what you're saying but in England people were denigrated for saying immigration was impacting local culture, called racist and accused of xenophobia, yet in Scotland it seems to be acceptable because it's maintaining tradition and culture. Also, people from outwith the area may be able to pay more for housing, and it obviously isn't being turned down by the locals selling the property, so it's OK to sell to 'outsiders' if they're paying enough.

IHaveBrilloHair

I do too. I don't discuss Independence with anyone. I keep my head down on the subject. The last one was unpleasant but not only for people like me who speak with an English accent. My neighbours fell out too. I am dreading the next IndyRef.

I have Brillo Hair as well. Curly but frizzy and the Curly Girl method does nothing for me!

@FeistySheep that's precisely the kind of insular behaviour that puts me off - seriously, is there no appreciation that people are different or may have a different culture or any type of welcoming vibe?

@Mincepiesallyearround

I mean no Scottish accent, I have an English one.

Thanks