Where to shop for Mother of the Bride outfit?

[IM0GEN]

I’m helping my sister shop for an outfit for her DDs wedding in the summer.

So far we have been recommended to try

Catherine’s of Partick in Glasgow
Lady G in East Kilbride
Gina Smart in Ayr
Frox of Falkirk
Catwalk in Falkirk ( who knew there were so many weddings in Falkirk )

We’ve only scanned websites so far and a lot of them look ...ahem....a bit frumpy. Maybe all their cool dresses are just in store

We are also looking for a shop in Edinburgh, where DSis lives, but without success. Apparently the best known shop there for MoB has just closed.

For avoidance of doubt, we are looking for an off the peg outfit, her budget doesn’t stretch to designer.

There's a boutiquey type place called Vanity Fair in Bearsden which does that sort of thing.

Also don't discount the big department stores like John Lewis or House of Fraser which stock brands like Gina Bacconi.

So many questions ...

You indicate that you don’t want ‘frumpy’ - but you seem to be looking for outfits specifically labelled as suitable for the Mother of the Bride. My observation is that any such outfit will be, frankly, nasty.

How does your sister usually dress? What is she most comfortable in. Does she want to look edgy and stylish or quietly conventional?

I don’t quite understand your distinction between off the peg and designer clothes. Surely you decide on a budget and browse as widely as possible?

What exactly is your sister’s budget? And will the specific location have any bearing on what people wear?

The sales have just started so it’s a really good time to shop online everywhere.

Does it have to be a high street shop or can you look online. Someone in the Style and Beauty topic linked to Nancy Mac dresses yesterday. They are beautiful and I’ll definitely be ordering one from their sale stock (my step children might be getting married within the next couple of years so I’m looking for non-frumpy mother of the bride type outfits too!)

Try Mcelhinneys in Donegal..they have a great selection and on sale at the moment

@SurpriseSparDay - My sister usually dresses in a smart casual style, I’d say contemporary but not high fashion.

So yesterday she was wearing wide cropped trousers, leather boots, a shortish wool jumper, scarf and wool coat. She doesn’t wear jeans / trainers / fleece / hoodie/ anorak. To work she wears dresses and trousers, not suits.

Neither of us do “ occasion wear “ , so we are both a but out of our depth on the whole MoB thing.

I think she would prefer to look slightly edgy rather than quietly conventional , at least that’s more her usual style.

However I suspect she feels a bit pressurised to go down the conventional MoB look. Hence my willingness to trek all over the country with her - I think her DD will push her into a look that isn’t her.

Re off the peg - she can’t afford to have a dress made for her ( I don’t think ) . I’m assuming that costs a great deal, although I’ve never done it.

Re location - it’s a hotel wedding ( no church ) in the south of England in the summer, so it’s safe to assume that it will be warmer than here.

@PineappleDanish - thank you, I will add these to the list.

@catwithflowers - yes she’s happy to look online but it’s hard to know what suits you if it’s something very different from your usual style.

Budget??

I got a lovely dress from ChiChi London to wear to my stepson's wedding. His mum wore a dress from Debenhams. You don't have to wear specific brands to look lovely in my experience.

Ooh budget - I’m not sure exactly, I’ve not asked her directly . Just because we’ve shared details of TTC our kids/ childbirth / episiotomies, I don’t think I could just ask her that directly .

I would guess about £500 ish.

@Nannyamc - thanks for the suggestion, their website looks good but I dont think it’s the kind of thing to buy without trying it on. And Donegal is a long way from Edinburgh .

Ok. Well that’s an ample amount to find something cool and elegant.

Spend an afternoon browsing

Matchesfashion. com

And

Net-a-Porter

Both huge websites with countless brands to consider. It really is worthwhile, at this time of the year, seeking out something beautiful in the sales rather than buying more ordinary stuff in less expensive shops.

I'd try John Lewis, Coast, Hobbs and LK Bennet as well as small local boutiques rather than specific "Mother of the Bride" places - which seem to charge extra for an outfit that isn't even "you", simply for the privilege of being labelled "mother of the bride"

As a Mother of the groom I've just got something from Nancy Mac, great customer service. I also tried on but returned some great outfits from Palones and SilkFred (lots on this website).

What age is your Dsis? I am approaching MOB age as DD1 is doing a post grad and living with her lovely BF. But I am 45 and recently was horrified at MOB outfits when ball gown shopping with DD4. Some of stores up thread seemed better suited to customers in their 60s than 40s.

I know when it is my turn (4DDs) I am going to struggle . I think it will be a dressmaker for me

How old is your friend OP? what is her normal style? What is her build/height? What season is the wedding? Does it have a "theme" she needs to fit in with?

I agree with previous posters and go with John Lewis etc as a starting point. A nice fitted dress with accessories will be fine, it doesn't need to be "mother of the bride".

Thanks for all these suggestions

@Lidlfix - she’s mid 50s, size 10 and not ready for beige lace and chiffon yet . But lots of MoB / MoG must also be young, slim and fashionable. I don’t think she’s an outlier among our age group.

Hell, there’s lots of fashion conscious grannies of the bride !

In this case, parents of the groom seem quite bossy/ controlling I mean decisive and seem to be dictating lots of things without consulting the bride / my sis and BIL. I think the pressure for a trad style outfit is coming from them via the bride. As you can guess, she’s young and easily influenced.

For example, the wedding is in England where groom lives and not in Edinburgh where the bride lives. There’s to be no ceilidh band because “people won’t know the dances “. Guest list is already more than 60% his side.

All the usual wedding drama. Sigh.

I’m going to bribe my own children to elope and save all the hassle that is the modern wedding.

I'm guessing then that MoG is trying to lead her down the frumpy path so that she can shine outshine the bride instead?

I'd go for something elegant, classy and understated with some quality accessories.

Hi wax on

My sis is 50 something , normal style is smart casual, 5’5” size 10 . Summer wedding in south of England so may be warm. Well warmer than Stirling

She needs to avoid pale pink as MOG has already chosen that . Otherwise a free hand. She doesn’t normally wear pastel colours but they appear to be compulsory .

My estimated budget of £500 ish max is for the whole outfit BTW, incl shoes, bag , hat.

I will look at all these websites tonight and bombard her with links.

How is your DD getting on in Dundee BTW?

This is quite weddingy:

www.johnlewis.com/gina-bacconi-jillian-chiffon-cape-crepe-dress/potpourri-pink/p4085141

I'm guessing then that MoG is trying to lead her down the frumpy path so that she can shine outshine the bride instead?

No danger , as we say in Glasgow. DN is very pretty #unbiasedauntie

I confess I’ve never met MoG but she sounds more like a bossy woman who believes she’s posher than our family. So she needs to show us how things are done properly. Etiquette and all that.

Of course, if she had read the Debrette’s guide to weddings she would know that the MoB gets first dibs on colours. You will be pleased to know I’ve resisted the urge to point that out.

My skills of smiling, nodding and saying “ oh really “ and “ hmm interesting” have improved since I became the mother of teenagers.

Hi IMOGEN, (waves back) ignore the pale pink then - didn't see the update :)

They do that in Fushia....

Maybe start with a hat and work from there? Not everyone is a hat person so that might be the more difficult part. Sounds like getting a dress might be fine as she has a great figure. Maybe look at some of the outfits people wear to the races?

Wearing pastel is not compulsory

She should choose a colour that suits her

Is she going wear a hat? Again, it's not compulsory: my mum didn't (she didn't want "hat hair", which I was fine with). MIL did complain about a good friend wearing a glorious hat that MIL described as a " mother of the bride hat " which was probably her code for disapproval that my mum wasn't wearing one (although as dh and I agreed, it did make it the perfect wedding as she'd found something to complain about )

Look at fascinators from Pearls and Swine.... Definately not frumpy!

www.johnlewis.com/browse/women/occasion-hats-fascinators/_/N-7hm4

Definitely avoid those labelled MoB they are awful stiff styles. Also regards colour, the MoB should choose her colour before MoG. Better to find something in her own style, I’ve been horrified by these wedding shops, styles are aimed at 65+ at least.

“But lots of MoB / MoG must also be young, slim and fashionable. I don’t think she’s an outlier among our age group.”

Yeah, but I think they just shop for wedding outfits not mother of the bride ones...

Patricia Forbes in Broughty Ferry, Dundee have some beautiful outfits.