Looking for advice from stay at home mama’s who have had experience with their partner which has made them feel less than…
My 22m/o is a dream. When my mat leave was over I decided to leave teaching and stay at home with her whilst pursuing my career as a women’s empowerment coach on the side (pretty ironic tbh). My fiancé was actively encouraging about this, especially as my mental health had gotten so bad since having KiT days etc.
My fiancé’s job means that he is away a lot. We’re currently coming to the end of a three month period during which he was only home for 10days. We spent 7 of them on holiday by the coast.
I’m a recovering people pleaser and the only area of my life where I still succumb to behaviours triggered by that part of me is in my relationship.
I often feel guilty that I have to spend money on food, am made very uncomfortable when I have to ask him to lend me cash for things like car insurance, and I never know if it’s ok for me to buy coffee or get dinner.
He’s also been really critical in the past of the way that I let things ‘slip’ at home, re housework, laundry etc.
He recently suggested that ‘all’ I do is play with my daughter and meet up with friends, and said he didn’t understand why there weren’t always clean towels and fresh sheets.
and of course with him having been away for so love there are things around the house that aren’t up to his standards because I’ve been overwhelmed by solo parenting…
Our communication is an issue, and we’re about to start couples therapy, but in two days I am flying solo with my little one to meet him in Switzerland for a few days. My daughter has never flown before so it’s stressful enough, but because our relationship feels so rocky right now, I’m also so so anxious about seeing him. Like I want to vomit.
Any advice, anicdotes or words of wisdom apeeciated x