Hostility!

[lavendersbluedillydilly12]

I have one son and a daughter on the way. My son is 16 months. I was a teacher of RE in a local comprehensive. We arranged our lives so we can just about survive on one salary. I've received an astonishing amount of hostility and suspicion about my decision to give up work. I really really don't get it. I'm 37 years old and know my own mind. Has anyone else had it?

I'm stopping for a while having had a third baby a while ago. So far most people understand but have had a few comments. The cost of nursery where we live is so expensive that financially there isn't much benefit

I never had this, who is making comments? It's none of their business, you have made it work for your family. Only you is living your life. Fuck them. Btw enjoy it, I loved my 7 years as a SAHM

@Disturbia81 my mum mostly! She worked all the time. I'm the eldest of four and she stayed home the longest with me and I was four months when she went back to work. It never troubled me before (truly!) but I had no idea she was so ideologically opposed to being a SAHM.

My SIL - tbh she just seems really jealous because she's the main breadwinner.

A couple of friends. One of them thought it was awful I'd started a new job pregnant.

I'm just really surprised. I got married at 34 and had my first baby at 35 and I'm 37 now and having my second baby. I feel so lucky and I just want people to see that I'm happy and I've got the life I chose. But I guess that's stupid!

@lavendersbluedillydilly12 you find that your decision to stay home is sometimes seen as a judgement on those that work, well some people take it like that which is possibly why you are receiving those comments.

Just remember to pay into a pension and have access to the family money. It worked well for us, absolutely no regrets.

Maybe they think that yeah! My mother certainly does but surely not everyone is as toxic as her. All our money is shared. I was a teacher so I earn a bit through marking. I'm 37 already so I don't expect to have babies forever! I expect I'll go back to work once they're all in school.

@lavendersbluedillydilly12 I endured comments in the primary school playground for 10 years, mainly a what do you do all day? with a head tilt. My response was sit on the sofa, eat bonbons and flick through a magazine because it wasn't a genuine question really was it.

My Mum was really supportive because she wanted to be a sahm but had to work for financial reasons. Your teaching job is great because it is fairly easy to get back into too. Don't feel like you have to defend or explain yourself to anyone about being a sahm. No one does that about a job.