Anyone else feel being a SAHP is mind numbing?

[yogibear0]

Everyone I've got a 3 & 4 yr old. Been a sahm since my oldest was born and I'm finding the whole thing pretty mind numbing! My day literally consists of me repeating the same things day in and day out. My kids also constantly fight! One min they get along the next they're bloody killing one another. The loudness is my home is driving me insane. I love my kids dearly and it took me a very long time to have them but the experience I thought I'd have with them doesn't exist.
I'm constantly scolding them for fighting, climbing things, breaking thing, shouting at each other. It just never seems to end. I also try to get what I can done round the house but I've no sooner tidied something until they undone my hard work minutes (sometimes seconds) later! I'm finding everything i do extremely pointless. I only get a min to myself when they go to bed and even then I'm spending that time wondering how I'm going to do it all tomorrow again. Is it normal to feel like this because I'm starting to question if I'm actually cut out for this.
I see other parents who seem to be managing just fine but I feel very alone. I cant even hold a conversation with anyone when my kids are with me because I'm constantly being called or demanded by them or watching them instead of listening to what someone is talking to me about. My entire existence now feels like it's just to be a mother and don't get me wrong I wouldn't change it for the world but I'm finding things really tough and repetitive.

Why don't they use their free nursery places?

only my oldest is in nursery and that's until 11.45 my other child is entitled to a free place and I can't afford it

sorry isn't entitled to a free place until Sept

Are you in the UK?

& are you eligible for any benefits?

Do they not go to nursery?

I hated being a SAHM, I lasted a year and then happily skipped back to work.

Don't feel bad about not enjoying it, lots of people don't. You'll probably find that you enjoy them more once they get to a different age/stage.

I was a sahm for a while and hated it for the same reasons more so at that age.

Things that helped was to have friends over with similar age children and at least be able to chat over the chaos.

In the end I got a part time evening job which was great as it meant I avoided the whole bedtime palaver a couple of times a week and got to have a bit of adult conversation and have an actual break in peace!

Sympathies though. Some people love being a sahm but I really struggled with it.

You should get 15hrs a week each, no?

all the best op

Are you a single parent?

You sound like me! I have a 3yo and 5yo and have been a sahp since my eldest was born (and, like you, it took a long time to have them so I think I built up very high expectations of what life would be like with them). The days can be very repetitive and mind-numbing. I often say to my dh that I'm really busy but really bored at the same time - I'm almost 40, I don't want to be spending my days playing cars and setting up tea parties lol! So I totally get where you're coming from and just wanted to say you're not alone. Things have become easier for me since my eldest started school and my youngest now does a couple of days at preschool too. I have time to properly tidy and clean up and recharge my batteries a bit. I've also tried to do a bit more self-care in the evenings as well so have been trying to do things like face masks and paint my nails. That has helped me get out of feeling like "just a mum" and an actual person instead.

Mum friends is the way to get through. You need a tribe that you can meet at the park or at each others' houses.

If you're not happy in the SAHP role it's also an idea to work towards working, even part time can make a world of difference.

It depends on you on making your days more interesting. Exploring outdoors always is good for young children and for you as well. Change if scenery and wear them out. I used to spend quite a lot of time outside at those ages.
At home boundaries, rather then endless repetition, they re not exactly babies anymore. Same goes for conversations/phone calls, not easy but they cant be thought. Doesnt have to be horrible till you can dump them at nursery/school.
And take time for yourself, why u only get a minute in the evenings?

I hear you. Just don't do what I did and get a full time job, that really sucks too.

I honestly hated being at home with mine.
I found it easier to parent out of the house.
We went out everyday, regardless of the weather.

I’m not cut out to be a SAHM - there’s nothing wrong with feeling the way you do, and nothing wrong with you! Do you have the option of not being a SAHM?

I’ve nearly finished my maternity leave and looking forward to going back to work part time. Feel like I’ll enjoy my time with DS so much more when it’s not so relentless.

I found it boring too. What helped me was getting out of the house every day, even in bad weather to the park or just for a walk round the streets. Also had a toddler group or soft play to go to every day. That on top of also going to visit people made sure they were tired out and I got some stimulation too. I wasn't a sahm for long though, I wanted to work.