To ask your family’s disposable income

[sochicsocheap]

It’s looking more and more likely that I will not return to my job after mat leave. Decision now will be SAHM or try and find an evening job but am curious to know what other families budgets are. Anyone mind sharing how much money you have after bills and necessities

This is going to end well 😂
I would but I've been accused on here of making it up.

Depends what your lifestyle is, how much you want to sacrifice nice things you're doing.

How stable is your partners job?

It’s going to be different for everyone. Different relationship dynamics, financial set ups, incomes, outgoings.

For us, all our accounts are joint except we have a Monzo account each for spending money, which we each get £100 into every week. I never spend anywhere near that much. DH always does!

Joint accounts are for everything else - groceries, savings, petrol, clubs, investments, gift buying, holidays, bills, mortgage.

It is sensible to keep all bills (mortgage, council tax, insurances, car costs, phone/TV/utilities etc etc etc) plus supermarket shops and at least £50 a week of "spare" money all within one salary.

Then the other parent's income can be used for non-essentials, or saving.

So we don’t live the life of luxury now anyway but I’m not sure if we’ll be sacrificing too much with just 1 income. We’d be going from £2,500 net pm to around £1,900 pm. Mortgage is £900 so £1,000 for bills and what ever else. Doesn’t sound a lot but I wonder if it’s doable

Doesn't sound very doable to me sorry OP. You have no spare money with that income - what about birthdays, christmas, holidays, unexpected illness, household essentials breaking or unplanned job loss?
It would be too precarious for me to be comfortable with.
Saying that though I have survived with it being that tight - just felt life was surviving though rather than living.

How much would you be paying out for childcare if you went back? I assume if you worked you would be working for very little once you've paid for nursery/childminder, so it sort of balances out either way. £1k would have been very doable for me with only 1dc, but we were very frugal back then. Nowadays being a SAHM with a baby seems to involve lots of coffees/lunches out and baby groups. Make sure that you factor these sort of things into your budget.

@sochicsocheap

So we don’t live the life of luxury now anyway but I’m not sure if we’ll be sacrificing too much with just 1 income. We’d be going from £2,500 net pm to around £1,900 pm. Mortgage is £900 so £1,000 for bills and what ever else. Doesn’t sound a lot but I wonder if it’s doable

My entire income is about £1400 pcm. My rent is £800.

Is it doable? Yes.
Is it fun? No.
Would I do it if I didn't have to? No.

That sounds v tight. Do your bills include money for Christmas, birthdays, haircuts, dental treatment, MoT and repairs, boiler service, the inevitable rise in energy bills, etc?

Of cause it's doable. Will it be fun? No.

Single parent here. After all bills and food I have about 6-800 a month, depending on any ad-hoc costs. Its tight and everything has to be budgeted for.

I don’t see how my disposable income would be relevant to your situation so no point sharing it…
What matters is whether YOU can live on that amount. I’d probably say yes, if you had to, and it was very short term. Would it be comfortable? No. Could you pay for birthdays, Christmas, unexpected repair bills, absorb rises to the cost of living? No I don’t think so.

That's going to be a squeeze - I wouldn't do it

Just to add it really depends on your lifestyle now. If you have local friends and a park and are happy to do free stuff (library, church baby groups with £1 entry fees) IKEA etc AND you are not concerned with luxuries at birthdays/Christmas (dc don't know what they get until at least 3) then it is doable if you really feel being a SAHM is important to you.
I know a few women who couldn't afford the coffees/lunches that their friends could and they were utterly miserable.

If we went with the cheapest childcare round here, I’d have £20 spare from my wage. So the money will not be there anyway. It’s a case of can we make do or not. I guess I won’t know until it happens 🤷🏻‍♀️

@sochicsocheap

If we went with the cheapest childcare round here, I’d have £20 spare from my wage. So the money will not be there anyway. It’s a case of can we make do or not. I guess I won’t know until it happens 🤷🏻‍♀️

Don't think of it being your wage. Think about the longer term value to your pension, salary and career progression.

@sochicsocheap

If we went with the cheapest childcare round here, I’d have £20 spare from my wage. So the money will not be there anyway. It’s a case of can we make do or not. I guess I won’t know until it happens 🤷🏻‍♀️

But you'll be increasing the number of years' of work experience? Meaning you could progress eventually and make more money. You will be earning pension.

You will be becoming more experienced so you could go get another better paid job.

There's no way I'd stay at home considering your income. Sitting at home not working whilst you can't afford a decent Xmas for your kids.

Ghat will be fairly grim to be honest. Council tax, utilities etc. But if you have no alternative will just have to make it work.

I would be looking for a part time job when your husband isn’t at work

Depending on where you live, I think that would be tough. We have a lot more coming in and things add up so fast. What sort of savings do you have?

Are you married?

I think you will need a weekend job in order to manage Christmas, birthdays etc. If I were you I would sign up for a few shifts at the local pub on Friday and Saturday nights which would give you a few hundred a month. I would also look at the £10 a day thread here on mumsnet. When I was staying at home I would make about £200 a month doing surveys and tests. That covered Christmas and a cheap 4 day break which was our holiday that year.

I don't think it sounds too tight at first glance, but you need to add it up. Make a spreadsheet and put everything on it; council tax, insurance, food, birthdays etc. I think either way is fine and you will get a lot from being home with your child if that's what you both want. If you are someone who relishes being at work and needs the break from home then that's fine too, it just depends what is right for you and your family.

Oh yes, please only consider doing this if you are married! If not then you cannot afford to ditch your career for three years as you are in a much more vulnerable situation

I don't think you'll have a disposable income OP. It's doable though, may not be much fun.

If you're inventive you could find a whole new way of doing stuff though.

Have you made a spreadsheet of every single outgoing you have? Be truthful, look at both bank accounts and write down everything.

I think it looks doable but you would need strict budgets and have to cancel a lot of luxuries.

We were on similar, with 2 small kids, when I was made redundant.

It was doable on one car, a cheap holiday, budgeting, no big spends. We had some savings. Fortunately nothing big happened re the car, boiler, etc.

This was sustainable for a couple of years before I found another job.