Groundhog Day

[Mamatotwo26]

Hi,

I am struggling. I need help.

There, I said it it’s out in the World.

I’m overwhelmed with everything, constantly screaming at my DC, fed up of the same shit routine everyday, resentful of DH, the list goes on.

For context, I’m currently a SAHM to DC. My work has slowly diminished over the years after being made redundant, no role has been ‘right’ for family life as we have no childcare options. I started a degree to give me some purpose in life, however that seems to come far down the pecking order in our Household so unless I grab 30 minutes around 9.30/10 then that’s failing also.

My youngest is ridiculously needy, I literally can’t be out of sight even to go to the toilet, my eldest has the attitude of a 16 year old, and it’s a constant battle to do anything without an arguement. My husband works 6 days a week, and is out of the house by 7am, then out by 8am on Sundays for club with eldest. Once he’s home on Sat/Sun it’s all about what eldest wants to do. If I suggest that I have time to do my own stuff it’s met with a guilt laden yeah fine, so I end up going along despite my own to do list being a mile long.

I have no idea what to do, or where to turn. All I know is with each passing day the idea of running away seems more and more appealing.

Thank you if you got this far, I don’t really know what I was intending to write!

How old are the kids ?

@GoodnightGrandma

6 & 1

I feel your pain. Sounds like you're having a really crappy time of it at the moment. It's hard to offer advice because I know you'll have thought of every possible way to solve this.

And I do recognise by the time you've got to the point of writing this, that half an hour on a Saturday morning isn't going to cut it.

What are your thoughts on what would help?

Sometimes I think the problem with burnout, is that you're so far into the situation you forget what life was like when you weren't burnt out and you can let actually remember what it's like not to be perpetually knackered.

I know this is hard and I'd find this really difficult. But tell your husband that next Saturday afternoon he's taking the kids. It doesn't matter if he's in a mood, he can tough it out for 4 hours. Then, go get your hair cut, go for a swim, take a walk, book a cheap premier inn and read a book in it for 4 hours. Whatever. But take a break and get out the house. Get out of your office!

For me, personally, I needed to get a job. I was a SAHM too. I needed adult company, and for someone to say thank you every now and then.
I’d look for a job, any job, that fits in with childcare and take it.
And 3 hours to yourself at the weekend. Go shopping, get a coffee and sit alone, anything, just get out for yourself.