Parter completely lost respect for me

[Saraj09876]

Has anyone else felt this way as a stay at home mum?
My little boy is 10 months now, and my partner just treats me like a complete idiot even tho when we met we were both in the same job role with exactly the same qualifications?
Keeps saying about how his sister and his mum both managed to keep the house tidy and manage with no sleep without asking their other half's to help out, he literally won't lift a finger and makes out like I am incapable for not being able to manage alone
He was a really nice guy up until we had the baby and as soon as things got hard he turned quite selfish :/
My house is clean but I tidy it about 3 times a day and it just get messy again! I'm trying my best but just feel like a complete failure.
Also my little boy isn't crawling yet where lots of kids his age are and my other half thinks there is something I'm not doing with him that delaying him which is upsetting me as I spend so much time with my boy and working on his development :/

Go back to work.

Show him you are very capable of managing on your own by getting rid of him.

Most people with a little baby or toddler will not be able to keep a house tidy- that is part of having a child.
When your partner is back from work it should be a 50/50 split.
Are you planning on going back to work?

Go back to work. You can't be a SAHP in a shitty marriage like this.
Once you've got a job and back on your feet a little, kick him the fuck out.

his sister and his mum both managed to keep the house tidy and manage with no sleep without asking their other half's to help out

More fool them then! Why should they have to? It's not you being incapable, it's him being lazy. Ask why he feels entitled to be lazy. You'll probably get some flannel about how he works, and then you can say that you're also working looking after your boy.
Or just save time and say 'go back to your mum's then, I can just be housekeeper for one person instead of two'.

He sounds like an absolute prick. I agree with skiptheheartsandflowers he should go back to his mums and you and LO can live happily ever after! He's meant to be your partner in all this, working with you not against you, he's showing his true colours now so sorry OP, you and your baby deserve so much better

Go back to work and tell him he will be doing 50% of cleaning and childcare. He’s treating you appallingly.
You’re not his servant. And yes, nobody can keep a house clean and tidy with a young baby, it’s really hard!
As for the development, what is HE doing? And I’m sure your baby is fine

What an idiot. Please don't put up with this

Dump him and go back to work even if its hard. Xxx

Ps, snd his "having no respect for you" is nothing to do with you and everything to do with the poor character he has

Have you spoken to your Health Visitor or GP about your son''s development? If they don't have concerns I'd stop worrying.

As an unmarried SAHM you are potent quite vulnerable. What is your plan regarding working?

As for your partner... You can persevere for x number of years, till you are totally demotivated and your self esteem is torn to shreds, until you've come to detest him for his selfishness and uncaring attitude.

At which point, as happens every day here at Mumsnet, you'll start a thread about your deep unhappiness and asking for help to leave him.

Or you can do it now, which is what I would recommend. Get yourself back to work and leave him.

Aaaahhhh.... just noticed this is an old thread!!

How are you doing now, @Saraj09876?