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A place for stay at home mums and dads to discuss life as a full-time parent.

SAHP

SAHM Guilt?

7 replies

MillyMollyMandy12345 · 14/05/2021 16:43

I’ve been a SAHM since my twins were born 2 years ago. DH works full time in a job and earns about three times more than I would working full time.

We recently explored me going back to work part time and DC starting nursery. I’d be limited as to which day I could work as I provide childcare to DSD two days a week.

We did the maths and everything I earned and more would go on childcare and the nursery with availability wasn’t easy to get to.

We’ve decided to delay a year until we can get some funding and DSD starts school (she’ll be with us 50% of holidays). Groups have opened up again and I’m enjoying taking DC there and meeting other mums.

I just feel so guilty to DH...he doesn’t love his work and I know he’d rather be at home too.

I am in the process of buying a rental property so I will be having some financial contribution but I still feel bad!

Does anyone else suffer with guilt?!

OP posts:
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BluebellsGreenbells · 14/05/2021 16:51

Absolutely not!

They get tea breaks coffee breaks lunch breaks alone travel time sick days holidays and all the rest of it!

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Babyg1995 · 14/05/2021 16:56

I felt this when I wasn't working dp has a good paid job I have 3 young dc I've now been working pt for around 7 months wage isn't great but it definitely helped me mentally just getting out the house for a few hours its definitely harder being a sahp please don't feel guilty .

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Sleepingdogs12 · 14/05/2021 17:04

Why feel guilty? Someone has to do the childcare, you sound busy with your two and his. What you contribute is valuable, he is very lucky that you are just getting on with it. If you want to get back to work for your own well being or security that is a different matter .

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Fitforforty · 19/05/2021 06:51

Nope. I did used to work outside the home and earned more than childcare costs and when my private pension then I earned a lot more but as a family we are all much better off with me at home.

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PomegranateQueen · 19/05/2021 06:56

Please don't feel guilty. As well as everything else you are doing you are providing childcare for your stepchild too. Imagine the childcare bill if you were both working!
Does DH want you to work?

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MiddleParking · 19/05/2021 07:08

You feel guilty to your husband because you’re providing him with free childcare (stymying your career prospects and your pension) for a child that isn’t yours? That is...not how you should feel about that!

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Em2122 · 03/12/2021 21:12

I don't think being at home with the kids is the easy option

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