need to say don’t seek or validate yourself by other folk opinion
Do what you need to do,what’s right for your family,your sanity ,your needs
There is always a mummy martyr who’ll vociferously tell you it’s your duty to be switched on and available 24-7. Why have baby if you palm or off to someone else yadda yadda
And finally lose the mummy guilt it’s destructive & toxic. So long as baby Is loved,safe and you’re responsible it’ll be fine

My dc all went to nursery a few mornings a week from around 9 months (youngest they would take them) I didn't work but dh worked away a lot and I used the time for catching up and doing the boring things I couldn't do with a baby there (admin, phone calls etc)
My dc all loved it and really benefited, I think me not working took the pressure off as I knew if they didn't settle I could take them out and try again later but they all loved it.

Good lord, book her in and crack on with it.

Mum guilt is natural but don’t indulge yourself with it. It’s perfectly natural to want some space back, and perfectly good for her to start getting used to a different environment. Not to mention good practice for the both of you for when you do go back.

Do it and don’t look back. Nothing else is open.

When I took a day off from work, I usually kept DC in nursery as we don’t get any help from family and we needed a break now and then. I used to dress up in smart clothes and pretend I was going to work but then got home into PJs. I know I shouldn’t care but I do care about being judged.

Do it! Let go of the guilt.

At least they’ll be settled by the time separation anxiety kicks in, they will be so used to their two mornings a week at nursery it’ll just be what they do.

The time will go so so quickly each morning but I bet you’ll feel better for it (I used to).

Also it’s a good idea to start them a few months before you’re back at work, as they’ll catch loads of illnesses at first, might need to be off for the odd day. Plus you will feel less worried going back to work knowing they’re settled in.

Nothing at all to feel guilty about.

I worry I'm letting her down. That I'm not fulfilling the ideal of being a mother.

There's no one-size-fits-all 'ideal' - it's a fantasy image. We all muddle along as best we can, and we all cope in different ways.

By all means do it if you need the break - if you need it you need it.

But your 6 month old baby does not need to go to nursery to see other children - at this age all they really need is you. Baby groups will resume in the coming months and they will presumably see other children when they go to nursery once you’re back full time. I don’t think it will benefit them in any way to go at this age (which doesn’t mean it will harm them, or that you shouldn’t do it).

Everything big said - settling, illness... Plus if groups etc aren’t on it’s really hard to fill the days.

I didn’t because I had regular help from my mum

I’d really struggle without it and I wouldn’t judge

My 10m old is starting two days a week from next week. I work pt and can work around her but we want her to have the socialisation. In 10 months she's been swimming twice and that's it. As much as dropping her off will get me (can't stay for settling in etc), I know it will be the best for her.
Go for it OP!

Definitely do it. Don’t bother trying to say it’s hood for the baby because I believe it’s not good or bad for your baby. They don’t need to be there but it also won’t do any harm at all. Do it for you and be confident with that decision.

Do it! You will be a better mother for having a break... she will benefit from socialising. I actually can't see any cons.

You sound very hard on yourself. I used to write things like this down and imagine someone saying them to me about someone else, what would you think if that person?

Do it. All 3 of my children have been to nursery and loved it. You’ll be a better mother to her if you’re getting a break, you can’t fill from an empty jug.

@EmJM did you put her into nursery?

I have been a SAHM for over 15 years and I put mine into nursery or playgroup for several reasons, some for them and some for me. For them, socialising, getting used to a nursery setting, someone else being able to settle them. For me, a break, a chance to get on with stuff without having a baby attached to me.

You haven't locked her in the shed at the bottom of the garden, you have put her in a hopefully loving and caring environment with other children. She will be fine. There are no medals for I parented with no help blah blah blah. Yes I did do that, my Mum was finally able to help me when Ds1 was 5 and Ds2 was 2 but no medal for my time doing it alone. Stop feeling bad about it.

You don't need to justify your maternity leave at all by saying spending the time wisely studying etc and do whatever is best for you, if you feel you need a break, which Is completely understandable especially being a first time mum and having no help from family - do it -you need to look after yourself to be the best mum you can be to your baby and your baby needs that- I would take the time to catch up with jobs etc if you need to and definitely for an actual break for yourself don't feel you need to specifically fill the time with anything to justify to others

Don’t feel guilty about doing what is right for you and your family
I run a nursery and we’ve had 2 babies start this week, one is four months and one is 8 months old
They both came in with no tears and just settled really well. It’s so much easier to settle a baby before the separation anxiety starts at about 9-12 months