Can you play with me....

[andtellyouofmydreaming]

How much time do you spend actively doing things with your children/child on an average day?

I have a 3 year old and a baby. Normally we get ready in morning/breakfast/hang up washing and then go out for an hour's walk... Then for the rest of the day if we are doing something outside of house I am fully attentive, but if we are at home I struggle not to just spend the whole time doing chores at same time to try and scale the enormous mountains of laundry/million meals that need making and clearing up from etc.

At the moment my 3 year old asks me to play all the time and I feel guilty whenever I'm not playing when he wants me to be...

My friend has had a lot of fun using ideas from a Facebook page called playhooray.
Website is here.

Basically showing you how to use resources you already have at home to play with your children. You don't have to buy anything.

Then you can work up to a bit of independent play so you can get on a bit.

Hang on in there, a baby and a toddler is hard hard work.

Ps I know I didn't answer your question, sorry!

following with interest. not enough time and I always feel guilty.

Thanks for the link @FlibbertyGiblets and also for the words of reassurance!

It's not a problem of not knowing what to play with them, but more how to play attentively and also do enough chores to make sure they are in clean clothes/fed/playing in clean environment etc!!

@Ichangedmynameonce yes that's exactly how I feel. I don't know how to juggle and balance it. When we go out it's easiest as not surrounded by all the stuff to do. But at home my son wants me to play with his toys with him, and often I say no, or am always saying in a minute, because I need to put the wash on/cook dinner/clear up lunch etc etc. I do bare minimum of household tasks. Just looking for some perspective from others to work out whether I have the balance as far off as my guilt makes me feel!!

Can you include him with some of the chores? Pairing socks, getting him to wash the spoons while you load the dishwasher, stacking the cans on top of each other in the cupboard after you've been shopping etc?

I know that'll probably make every job twice as long, but at least you're doing an activity together rather than you both getting frustrated at not doing stuff together.

@Gazelda that's the difficulty : that's what I used to do - when he was 2 - 3 he loved helping me, so we 'played' at cooking, laundry etc etc. For the last 6 months though he doesn't want to do that anymore, just wants to play with his toys. He'll occasionally want to join in with chores, but mostly he wants me to construct Lego or play cars etc with him...

There's basically no answer to this. You're at such a tricky stage with two so young. Just try to say "yes" more often than you say "no/in a minute" and assure yourself that you're doing a great job. I remember the guilt well and it got me nowhere.

Just remembered one thing i used to do that was helpful. I used to make myself and kids a packed lunch in the morning (or night before) so that was one less job and we could eat picnic style on the mat or out in the garden if the weather was nice.

Thank you @whitianga , your advice of saying yes more often than no is actually so simple and so good... I've been trying that and it's really helping, even if I just go and play for ten minutes it means he's happier and I feel better too. So thank you !

It is really hard. I'm a single stay at home mum. On the indoors days when I have chores to get on with.. My little girl helps me load the washing machine and things like that.. But then she sits in the dining room so he can see me in the kitchen and does colouring and stickers.. I join in sporadically between chores. Peppa pig also helps sometime. I try not to feel too bad because we try to go out at least one day of the weekend whether it's soft play or the farm.. Independent play is also very good for them :)

Sorry I meant to say single working mum not stay at home mum 😁

F