Hello all.
I wanted to ask the opinions of SAHP about what you would do in my shoes 're return to work... I'm going mad! Wanted a SAHP opinion as normally on MN the consensus is always to work but I think that's because there s so many whop who recommend what they are doing.
Due back from 2nd mat leave soon. Have been offered 2 days a week (max I ever want to work til DD is at uni so I can still be there for them etc)
Pay - it technically costs me to go to work until next April when I get my 15 hrs. Then I just about break even. I could technically put my whole wage in my pension and pay out of DH's wages though which would be a break even of sorts.
dh earns decent salary so my salary doesn't really come into it (and will stay out of mortgage stuff etc as I'm thinking if I need to pay for private school at some point I can just go FT and pay for it out of my wage, which I don't want to ideally as prefer state and not FT work!!)
Job - nothing spectacular but I have lots of friends there. My boss is keen to make it work for me to return as I've had good reviews etc. No room for promotion really but I plan to study a bit when DD is at nursery school and maybe something more interesting after.
Reasons to return
1 To give me some "me time",
2 a sense of this is the thing I do- does that make sense? Not a purpose but similar
3 Gives me motivation to be really full on the days I have the kids as I don't get stuck in a "meh" rut
4 socialising with colleagues, esp if I can have Friday as a working day.
5 a rest!
6 won't feel too guilty shopping as I'm technically earning,
7 DS needs to do at least 1 day a week at nursery anyway as it really helps his speech delay so I don't need to factor him in (he currently does 2 full days).
8 Gives my brain a workout
9 Can use the gym at lunch
10 Healthcare included which is mildly useful
11 dd is very clingy, maybe this will be good for her?
12 I always stress about money even though we don't need to so this might help me not stress
Cons -
1 time will go too quick and my baby will be grown up,
2 I'll miss her too much, she will miss me too much,
3 If I return I might forget to evaluate if I want to leave or not and Ill just stick with the status quo and then realise I've missed out
4 I might decide to have another baby because I've missed out on DD's baby hood (nearly 1 atm) - I do acknowledge this last point is crazy btw.
Basicslly I'm thinking to return for a month or 2 and see how I feel as it's easier to quit than find a new job. But what would you do??? I keep having sleepless nights as I HATE deciding things lol
I'm just not sure if I want to keep DD my baby forever as she s my last so maybe that's clouding my judgement.... she still seems so tiny 
When I was working between the DC I felt mildly depressed as i missed him.so much but j was pregnant so was focusing on "powering through", also was FT.