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A place for stay at home mums and dads to discuss life as a full-time parent.

SAHP

How do you get your partner presents as a SAHP?

12 replies

Youngmamaa2 · 01/12/2019 16:05

I'm a SAHM to a 2 and half year old and a 9mo. Id usually spend £100/£200 on DP but this year I have non of my own money, he's the sole earner! Previous years we where where entitled to family tax/working tax credits which i would use for myself but we don't get that this year.
So my question is how do SAHP get their other halfs presents? Do you just their money and get them something small? Or do you not get them anything?

OP posts:
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Wildorchidz · 01/12/2019 16:08

Do you have access to the money your partner earns ? Without having to ask? If you do then use that.
Which is what I did.

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Youngmamaa2 · 01/12/2019 16:09

Yeah I can usually just chip in to what I need , just feels odd, like he's buying his own presents 😂

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Spudlet · 01/12/2019 16:12

We have a joint account so I use that. We don’t spend as much on one another as we did once, but that’s only to be expected as we have a child now, and less income.

I also sometimes make things - last year I made DH a ‘corpse run counter’ (a corpse run being what you do when you die in a computer game we both play). It wasn’t expensive to make but it was personal, and he likes it very much and still resets it every time one of our group bites the dust Grin

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shocking8655 · 01/12/2019 16:12

Well he's not really paying for his own gifts as your working too to raise his children and allowing him to continue in his career, Therefore what he earns is also yours to share.

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GruffalOH · 01/12/2019 16:14

I consider the money that he earns and that goes into our joint account as my salary for looking after his kids all day ;) so I just use the part that is my salary Grin

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merryhouse · 01/12/2019 16:15

Sounds like you need to have a system for each of you to have Spending Money.

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ParkheadParadise · 01/12/2019 16:23

I have my own bank account. I have a direct debit transfer every month from the joint account into my own.

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Mabbers · 01/12/2019 16:30

It's family money isn't it?
But this is why we don't buy presents, we're both pretty shite at them and I hate the idea I'm wasting half my money on the shite.

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ColdRainAgain · 01/12/2019 16:31

I just spend on the credit card.
He is only earning the money he does because I quit my job to deal with the majority of the child and house stuff.

When I was earning, I still just shopped on the credit card...

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carbo · 01/12/2019 21:46

I just use money out of our joint account. Technically he has earned it but as other posters have said I work hard all day with our children and running our house so it's my money too. I don't go overboard, I'd spend €100 max on his Christmas present.

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Coughy4u · 15/01/2020 04:21

I would do something myself like a craft or a diy gift or his fav meal.

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LolaSmiles · 15/01/2020 10:19

A lot depends on how your finances are structured in your family.

If you both have separate account then it would come from there with whatever is transferred to the SAHP
If you have a joint account then it comes from there
If you have credit cards then it can come from there

There's no one way to arrange finances in a relationship so you're best speaking to your DP about what's right for finances and birthdays in your family.

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