Do you ever regret giving up work?

[joanne1062]

Since returning from maternity leave for the second time I have decreased my hours significantly which means I have to squash a lot into a little time. I’m really struggling with the work life balance and feel like I can’t find a happy medium. I’m thinking of handing my notice in. My husband earns enough to support us and I also run a self catering unit which earns a good amount annually.
I just don’t know if the right thing is to hand my notice in, I wonder if i will regret it in the long run. So basically has anyone regretted leaving work or was it the best thing for your family?

Anyone go back to work and regret it and wished they had stayed a SAHM?

If you decide to become a SAHM, what would happen in the future if your DH decided he would like to either decrease his hours or become a SAHP? Could you pick up your career again quickly?

@Parker231 I'm already a SAHM and want to go back to work. See my earlier posts

@IdiotInDisguise good point, although our lives are worlds away now from what they used to be (on all levels) and we've somehow managed to maintain a close bond

Well, I’m a politics nut but exDH was more interested in technology, which was one of the interests I lost when I decided to stay at home.

I remember him coming home talking about all his adventures working abroad, just for me to proceed to narrate how I had taught the new puppy to sit with a digestive.

Although we are both former academics the gap between his intellectual interests and mine grew too big, and then he became a man in Lycra... by that time I was already back at work but someway he assumed it was my job to take fully on the care of DS and the house to allow him to do his “hobby” every night and the whole weekend.

So we split, he is worth several millions, while I and his child been scraping by in a combination of not so well paid jobs. But each to their own

I was a sahp for 12 years. Now back in the workplace. I don't regret it for a second. It is really important to keep your work skills current somehow (volunteering, freelance etc) I was able to go back to my old job on the same level at the same salary when the kids were at high school.

@joanne1062 what would happen to your pension? Would you and your dh continue to Prioritise it and pay into one for You at a good rate?

@IdiotInDisguise I completely see your point. After 4 years as a SAHM I feel like DP finds me boring as (to be fair) I have nothing else to talk about apart from DC-related stuff

I regret giving up work as I'm now finding it hard to get back into the jobs market, both from a skills point of view and a confidence one - find it hard to believe that someone would actually pay me for doing something! I only gave up as I was made redundant whilst on maternity leave and couldn't afford childcare.

Similar to some other PP, DP is quite financially controlling and will spend his time moaning asking what we need more money for; doesn't seem to realise that it costs money even to take the bus into town and let them play at the (free) creche. Then he will simultaneously say "why don't you ever have new clothes? You've been wearing those ones for years!"

Honestly, if I had skills to do a part time/ self employed job, I'd love to do it (working on that at the moment). But DP works long hours and sometimes shifts too and we have no family childcare which doesn't help. I feel completely stuck most of the time.

I’ve been a sahp for 8 years since my eldest was born. My youngest is 5.
I love it. No intention to go back.
Very fortunate that my husband earns enough and he pays into my pension which was set up when I was at work (I was a solicitor who out earned him).
I didn’t want to miss out on anything with my kids and don’t value a flashier car, designer clothes etc over being at home. I like that I’m not permanently frazzled from juggling job and kids/home. I volunteer, exercise, cook, see pals.