Mums judging me ?

[dawn96]

I’m probably being anxious but nobody’s ever made any effort with me at baby group I have to really go out of my way to speak to them it’s like getting blood from a stone and then they cancel when we do make plans ,I try to make friends with people similar in age to me as I’m 23 and I have no friends my own age,Anyway I wondered why for so long getting so upset about it and I think I know why. One of them mentioned in the online group how annoying those people are who have it all together ,They were all commenting saying how annoying it is when there’s those mums who breastfeed and blw at 6 months and have gender neutral clothing and don’t give McDonald’s and just think they’re better than everyone and I do all of those things (except think I’m better obviously) is this why they don’t like me ! Has anyone experienced hostility for being one of those parents ? Even if you’ve never blabbed on about it ☹️ I can’t think why else they don’t like me and in this case even if that’s not the reason it’s still hurtful that they all take the mick out of people like me

You're better off without people like that

How old is your little one? It took me ages to find like minded mums, and my friendships increased once dd was playing with particular children, aged about 2, 2.5ish

My god, they sound absolutely vile. Better to stay away if they're so judgy.

Although it's nice to have mum friends it's fine to have friends that aren't mothers. Having a mum friend doesn't automatically mean that the children will be friends.

How old is your baby? I've been going to toddler groups for years now and they vary a lot. Try a few (and maybe some classes)until you find a nice bunch. Also, keep going back, even if no one talks to you the first time.

It is incredibly hard to make 'Mum' friends. I met a woman who's child gets along great with mine but her schedule means she's only available after 5 pm (no weekends)... I have 3 kids and 5 pm is my busiest time of the day so I just get the feeling she isn't interested which is unfortunate for our DC's.

It's natural for people to judge, it's usually a sign of their own insecurities and what they perceive as failures in their own actions. I totally empathise with you OP, it's soul crushing to feel so alone and unwanted. I'm sure things will look up soon, and you'll find your people, just keep persevering. :-)

I understand where your coming from at baby group's some are very clucky I was judge at one for not bf and doing blw but I was like meh if you don't bother with me I won't bother with you

Why don't you have any friends your own age?

Find another baby group to go to. I went to three before I found one that I liked and gelled with me. The first one was incredibly cliquey, the second one I just didn't like the people running it, and the third was fine.

You need to remember though, that the only thing you have in common with other mums or carers at baby groups is that you are all there with babies. That's all. They're just a random selection of other people, and aren't necessarily the sort of people you would seek out as a friend in other circumstances.